Short and Asian for men is pretty much the kiss of death for dating in America

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Perhaps shameful is the wrong word. Sad or unfortunate would be better.
Sad that someone cannot get laid at all (too ugly, socially awkward, disabled)? Sure
Sure or unfortunate someone can't get laid with super attractive women? Not at all.
 
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If he's an Asian doctor and he wants to start a family why doesn't he just get an arranged marriage lol or at least some arranged meetings. If he just wants to bang someone I feel like all the options have been offered.

If I didn't feel like he was such a whiney rag I'd introduce him to some of the cute ladies I know.
 
If he's an Asian doctor and he wants to start a family why doesn't he just get an arranged marriage lol or at least some arranged meetings. If he just wants to bang someone I feel like all the options have been offered.

If I didn't feel like he was such a whiney rag I'd introduce him to some of the cute ladies I know.

I don't know why there's still this stereotype that if you're Asian, you can get an arranged marriage. I know a lot of Asian people and not one still follows that custom, and can't even if they wanted to. And I think that if you've gone 35 years without having sex, or even been on a real date, in a culture that ties self-esteem so tightly to the ability for a guy to "pull," and you've spent those 35 years watching other people do it seemingly without effort, you've got a right to complain. And be angry. And bitter. Is it helpful? No. But it's far from illogical, irrational, or unjustified.
 
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I don't know why there's still this stereotype that if you're Asian, you can get an arranged marriage. I know a lot of Asian people and not one still follows that custom, and can't even if they wanted to. And I think that if you've gone 35 years without having sex, or even been on a real date, in a culture that ties self-esteem so tightly to the ability for a guy to "pull," and you've spent those 35 years watching other people do it seemingly without effort, you've got a right to complain. And be angry. And bitter. Is it helpful? No. But it's far from illogical, irrational, or unjustified.
Yea this exactly
 
I don't know why there's still this stereotype that if you're Asian, you can get an arranged marriage. I know a lot of Asian people and not one still follows that custom, and can't even if they wanted to. And I think that if you've gone 35 years without having sex, or even been on a real date, in a culture that ties self-esteem so tightly to the ability for a guy to "pull," and you've spent those 35 years watching other people do it seemingly without effort, you've got a right to complain. And be angry. And bitter. Is it helpful? No. But it's far from illogical, irrational, or unjustified.
I just wanna add to that that for all we know he could have been going out nonstop for the last decade and have just fallen through the cracks and failed to meet the right woman. It is entirely possible since he wasn't dealt the best hand to start with and so much of it just depends on pure luck.
 
This thread is a major train wreck. Advising OP to solicit prostitutes? Hahaha.. Smgdh
 
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I don't know why there's still this stereotype that if you're Asian, you can get an arranged marriage. I know a lot of Asian people and not one still follows that custom, and can't even if they wanted to. And I think that if you've gone 35 years without having sex, or even been on a real date, in a culture that ties self-esteem so tightly to the ability for a guy to "pull," and you've spent those 35 years watching other people do it seemingly without effort, you've got a right to complain. And be angry. And bitter. Is it helpful? No. But it's far from illogical, irrational, or unjustified.

I can attest to that as an "Asian aborigine" who just moved to the U.S. one year ago. I am not aware of any of my classmates or friends in Asia is able get arranged marriage. I don't know about South Asia or West Asia though.
 
This thread is a major train wreck. Advising OP to solicit prostitutes? Hahaha.. Smgdh
Instead the OP should just focus on himself and "put himself out there" right? Maybe one day he'll get lucky and bang that 200lb fatty ;)
 
Instead the OP should just focus on himself and "put himself out there" right? Maybe one day he'll get lucky and bang that 200lb fatty ;)

You keep making jabs towards overweight people... and I really do not understand why.
 
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OP have you ever gotten close to having sex?
 
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You keep making jabs towards overweight people... and I really do not understand why.
Unless you have a fetish for that type of thing, you won't be attracted to fat chicks.
 
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I don't know why there's still this stereotype that if you're Asian, you can get an arranged marriage. I know a lot of Asian people and not one still follows that custom, and can't even if they wanted to. And I think that if you've gone 35 years without having sex, or even been on a real date, in a culture that ties self-esteem so tightly to the ability for a guy to "pull," and you've spent those 35 years watching other people do it seemingly without effort, you've got a right to complain. And be angry. And bitter. Is it helpful? No. But it's far from illogical, irrational, or unjustified.
I can attest to that as an "Asian aborigine" who just moved to the U.S. one year ago. I am not aware of any of my classmates or friends in Asia is able get arranged marriage. I don't know about South Asia or West Asia though.

Y'all I'm Asian and I've seen at least 6 arranged meetings that turned into 4 marriages in the last 10 years. I didn't say arranged marriage expressly like "here's this girl,marry her next month". I also said arranged meeting like" here's this nice girl, go on dates."

Especially in the 35 age range I think this is still a viable option. P sure one of my uncles was a huge loser virgin of 40 and he still married into my family somehow. My aunt is skinny btw since everyone here hates fatties so much apparently. Hatin asses


Also yeah there are some circumstances where it could be irrational and unjustified. Has anyone seen Lorde's boyfriend I mean she looks like a toad but he's ugly as sin. Guess what's different about him and op, he's getting laid. If he wants to **** out of his league visually he's gonna have to figure something out. I'm not saying **** 16 year old musicians I don't approve of that. If he's been approaching all types of legal girls I'm not gonna berate him. If he's been stuck up his ass thinking he deserves some imaginary goddess thennnn

Didn't someone else say it? not everyone gets to **** 9-10s get over it
 
Unless you have a fetish for that type of thing, you won't be attracted to fat chicks.

My point is that it is very disturbing to see someone holding such a superficial value of other human beings. People have a more intrinsic value than just their bodies, and the way you keep labeling women on some kind of number scale '4' vs '10' and talking about fatties... that seems so petty, and almost even misogynistic. It makes me sad to see this from a future physician, as kindness and compassion for others are important qualities.
 
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My point is that it is very disturbing to see someone holding such a superficial value of other human beings. People have a more intrinsic value than just their bodies, and the way you keep labeling women on some kind of number scale '4' vs '10' and talking about fatties... that seems so petty, and almost even misogynistic. It makes me sad to see this from a future physician, as kindness and compassion for others are important qualities.

Oh no you didn't. Physicians are people too, made up of the same nuts and bolts. Kindness and compassion don't have anything to do with attraction. Attraction is entirely amoral and says nothing about people's characters, as much as people want to think/pretend/make otherwise.
 
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My point is that it is very disturbing to see someone holding such a superficial value of other human beings. People have a more intrinsic value than just their bodies, and the way you keep labeling women on some kind of number scale '4' vs '10' and talking about fatties... that seems so petty, and almost even misogynistic. It makes me sad to see this from a future physician, as kindness and compassion for others are important qualities.

I'm never quite sure why people are always so offended when people talk about that stuff, though. I mean, sure, it's harsh, but it's only verbalizing what most people are thinking. In other words, if people didn't judge other people for being fat and then someone came around and started talking about how people hated fatties, then you'd be right. But people don't generally feel attracted to fat people, so I don't know that there's anything petty, or certainly misogynistic (since women aren't particularly attracted to fat men, either), about it. The same can be said for the "ranking" system. Even if you don't like that a woman is labeled a "4" or even a "10," people are doing that mentally already. All they're doing by verbalizing it is conveying to other people how attractive they find that person. It's no different than if I said "that person is unattractive to me," although you may feel it's more crass, because it's actually more accurate.

I dare say that women do the same with guys, but they're probably not as brutal. However, on the flip side, woman are said to be brutal about things like dissecting how a guy was during sex, which men aren't (e.g., here's how big he was, here's how good he was in bed with specifics, etc.). And women don't consider that crass or petty, but informative and titillating.
 
Maybe one day he'll get lucky and bang that 200lb fatty ;)

For someone who likes to lecture the rest of us about how we need to be non-judgmental, you're sure quick to mock anyone who doesn't have the same attractions you do.

Unless you have a fetish for that type of thing, you won't be attracted to fat chicks.

Or unless you evaluate a woman as a person, instead of objectifying her as a body for your lust. Your comments have hitherto made zero reference to a woman's character, attitudes, education, skills, or pretty much anything outside the bedroom. If you want to talk about unhappy men, let's start with the endless troop of medical guys who ignored those things in order to chase someone who reminded them of a model.

Kindness and compassion don't have anything to do with attraction.

If that's true of you, that breaks my heart.
 
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If that's true of you, that breaks my heart.

I think you misunderstood me. I don't mean that if someone is kind and compassionate, that it doesn't make me more attracted to them. It does. All else equal, I would certainly be more attracted to someone who is kind and compassionate over someone who is mean and selfish. But I'm not attracted to people because "I" am kind and compassionate. By that logic, the kindest and most compassionate person is attracted to a whole swarth of people, whereas the most mean and selfish is attracted to almost no one. That's not how it works.
 
My point is that it is very disturbing to see someone holding such a superficial value of other human beings. People have a more intrinsic value than just their bodies, and the way you keep labeling women on some kind of number scale '4' vs '10' and talking about fatties... that seems so petty, and almost even misogynistic. It makes me sad to see this from a future physician, as kindness and compassion for others are important qualities.
Some people are hotter and some are uglier. You can put them on a scale of 1-10 so that people know how ugly or hot you're talking about. :)
If you don't think that's how most people are... LOL
 
For someone who likes to lecture the rest of us about how we need to be non-judgmental, you're sure quick to mock anyone who doesn't have the same attractions you do.



Or unless you evaluate a woman as a person, instead of objectifying her as a body for your lust. Your comments have hitherto made zero reference to a woman's character, attitudes, education, skills, or pretty much anything outside the bedroom. If you want to talk about unhappy men, let's start with the endless troop of medical guys who ignored those things in order to chase someone who reminded them of a model.



If that's true of you, that breaks my heart.
Because the number one thing is attraction. If someone is a 4/10, you won't look any further (if you can do better that it). If someone is at least a 7 (assuming you're an attractive person yourself), then you proceed to investigate further into them.
 
I went to a med school interview yesterday and the women in med school are definitely a lot taller than average. We met the M1s and M2s and there were a few short girls but most of them were 5'7 and above. Most of the female doctors We met were really tall to. The 3 girls that did our tour were all above 6 feet. There is definitely some correlation between female height and going into medicine.
 
Because the number one thing is attraction. If someone is a 4/10, you won't look any further (if you can do better that it). If someone is at least a 7 (assuming you're an attractive person yourself), then you proceed to investigate further into them.
Although we all find certain things attractive there is still a degree of subjectivity. Each person has different tastes.

Although I personally think its a bad thing for most people, I have to agree with what you're saying here. Most average people will go for the best-looking partner they can get despite possible red flags or having other more compatible options.
 
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I went to a med school interview yesterday and the women in med school are definitely a lot taller than average. We met the M1s and M2s and there were a few short girls but most of them were 5'7 and above. Most of the female doctors We met were really tall to. The 3 girls that did our tour were all above 6 feet. There is definitely some correlation between female height and going into medicine.

Haha idk maybe. I'm 5 10 so I fit the bill
 
Although we all find certain things attractive there is still a degree of subjectivity. Each person has different tastes.

Although I personally think its a bad thing for most people, I have to agree with what you're saying here. Most average people will go for the best-looking partner they can get despite possible red flags or having other more compatible options.
Definitely. But most men prefer the same type of women for dating purposes and vice versa for women. Some people have specific tastes that they may seek out for casual fun (ex. one night stands) but not necessarily a long term relationship. Some men may want to have sex with a fat woman due to a specific taste/fetish... but they wouldn't actively want to pick out a fat chick to marry. But when you're not attractive yourself as a male, then you take the best you can get.
 
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Ok so I was talking with my old roomate today. He said that a mutual female friend of ours told him that she pitied me and wanted to set me up with some of her chronically single friends, but that they didn't want to date a short Asian. I kind of walked away from this feeling hurt and a bit disgusted. I hear women especially the nurses and techs complain all the time about how they can't find any guys to date. And before you trash me and other posters about complaining about obese women, obesity 90% of the time can be controlled (not everyone has a fricking hormonal disorder). Height cannot unless you think it is a prudent idea to get my bone broken in half and have metal rods inserted. I'm so sick of wanting to date and to be honest I'm coming to terms with the fact that I'll probably be alone forever. I just need to engage in hobbies, work and reading after residency is over.
 
roll with the punches, my friend. What you have is a case of what we clinically call bagingophobia. You will have to go thorugh a process called Systematic desensitization psychotherapy.
 
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Ok so I was talking with my old roomate today. He said that a mutual female friend of ours told him that she pitied me and wanted to set me up with some of her chronically single friends, but that they didn't want to date a short Asian. I kind of walked away from this feeling hurt and a bit disgusted. I hear women especially the nurses and techs complain all the time about how they can't find any guys to date. And before you trash me and other posters about complaining about obese women, obesity 90% of the time can be controlled (not everyone has a fricking hormonal disorder). Height cannot unless you think it is a prudent idea to get my bone broken in half and have metal rods inserted. I'm so sick of wanting to date and to be honest I'm coming to terms with the fact that I'll probably be alone forever. I just need to engage in hobbies, work and reading after residency is over.

Well given Darwinism is based on chance, we all end up with something out of luck. You ended up having high intelligence but you're shorter.

Did you take note on the first bit of advice in this thread (before the hooker thing)? I personally know 2 asian guys who are really jacked and they're about 5'5.. they've banged a couple decent chicks here and there and ended up in a relation with someone who's decent. Advice is, hit the gym extremely hard and aim for 185lbs or so at 8% body which would look terrific at your height. Wear tight clothing to compliment your physique... flaunt everywhere that you're a doctor.. and you'll definitely have a bit of success with women who are 5'5 and shorter.

But since all of that takes some time (not sure what your physique is like at the moment), visit a few expensive/pricey escorts who have tons of online reviews (which guarantees you that it's not a set up basically)... and you'll be good to go.

(Inb4 some guy that doesn't even lift comes in here saying physique/body doesn't matter)
 
Well given Darwinism is based on chance, we all end up with something out of luck. You ended up having high intelligence but you're shorter.

Did you take note on the first bit of advice in this thread (before the hooker thing)? I personally know 2 asian guys who are really jacked and they're about 5'5.. they've banged a couple decent chicks here and there and ended up in a relation with someone who's decent. Advice is, hit the gym extremely hard and aim for 185lbs or so at 8% body which would look terrific at your height. Wear tight clothing to compliment your physique... flaunt everywhere that you're a doctor.. and you'll definitely have a bit of success with women who are 5'5 and shorter.

But since all of that takes some time (not sure what your physique is like at the moment), visit a few expensive/pricey escorts who have tons of online reviews (which guarantees you that it's not a set up basically)... and you'll be good to go.

(Inb4 some guy that doesn't even lift comes in here saying physique/body doesn't matter)

Dude, are you serious? You know what that looks like? I'll give you an example of someone who's 5'5" and 185 lbs at below 10% body fat: Franco Columbu.

Franco_Columbu1.jpg


You are advising the OP to, at the age of 35, get the physique of a historically renowned champion bodybuilder?
 
Groce.

No, but really. The super low fat, jacked, veiny bodybuilder look is NOT attractive to they majority of women. Muscles? Sure, we like em. But not that extent.
 
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This bro needs tinder in his life.
 
Dude, are you serious? You know what that looks like? I'll give you an example of someone who's 5'5" and 185 lbs at below 10% body fat: Franco Columbu.

Franco_Columbu1.jpg



You are advising the OP to, at the age of 35, get the physique of a historically renowned champion bodybuilder?

Yea exaggerated the stats slightly.. make it 175-180lb at just over 10% body fat.That should be the goal.
 
Groce.

No, but really. The super low fat, jacked, veiny bodybuilder look is NOT attractive to they majority of women. Muscles? Sure, we like em. But not that extent.
LOL. Typical female response.

You have the image of an pro bodybuilder in your head (who's like 260lbs at <5% body fat and on extreme doses of a variety of steroids and peptides) and you're comparing that to typical jacked guys. For one, most guys will never get that big unless they want to get fat as well. Second, it is impossible to walk around with that low of body fat and maintain that much mass for anything more than a small period of time.
The guy in the picture also, I can guarantee you would find attractive if you had seen him in his daily look (since he doesn't walk around most of the year at that body fat level).

On an interesting side note (perhaps to the OP), the bigger I got... the more female attention I got. It was almost linear. But for some reason girls would always be like "oh don't get too big though! it'll look bad." *rolleyes*
Anyway, I'm no longer concerned with bulking/physique that much, I compete nationally/internationally in powerlifting now. :)
 
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Let's be realistic here, OP at 35 will not be that huge even if he puts his maximum effort into it. I bet he won't have half the muscle even if he starts doing heavy roids. Most guys like that start training way early and have the genes for it. Put it simply, OP should not be concerned about being too big. Just don't look fat and bloated like a balloon.
 
LOL. Typical female response.

You have the image of an pro bodybuilder in your head (who's like 260lbs at <5% body fat and on extreme doses of a variety of steroids and peptides) and you're comparing that to typical jacked guys. For one, most guys will never get that big unless they want to get fat as well. Second, it is impossible to walk around with that low of body fat and maintain that much mass for anything more than a small period of time.
The guy in the picture also, I can guarantee you would find attractive if you had seen him in his daily look (since he doesn't walk around most of the year at that body fat level).

On an interesting side note (perhaps to the OP), the bigger I got... the more female attention I got. It was almost linear. But for some reason girls would always be like "oh don't get too big though! it'll look bad." *rolleyes*
Anyway, I'm no longer concerned with bulking/physique that much, I compete nationally/internationally in powerlifting now. :)

You interpret my posts weirdly. I didn't have an image in my head, I was commenting on the image provided and people who also look like that. I said typical jacked guys are fine.
 
Let's be realistic here, OP at 35 will not be that huge even if he puts his maximum effort into it. I bet he won't have half the muscle even if he starts doing heavy roids. Most guys like that start training way early and have the genes for it. Put it simply, OP should not be concerned about being too big. Just don't look fat and bloated like a balloon.
175-180lbs at over just over 10% body fat isn't attainable? lol cmon now. It's 100% attainable with the right effort/routine/consistency/diet. And this being all naturally. He could get massive with a few steroid cycles.
 
You interpret my posts weirdly. I didn't have an image in my head, I was commenting on the image provided and people who also look like that. I said typical jacked guys are fine.
And I said you would definitely find that guy attractive in his every day body. The only reason you said that's gross is because you think guys looking as big/lean as that guy, walk around that lean and veiny looking all year round.. well they don't. It takes weeks of contest prep to cut down body fat levels (very low calorie intake combined with several steroid compounds to trim body fat while maintaining muscle), and you go through a process of carb deloading/loading.. dehydration, sodium intake changes, and then tanning/pump ups combined with lighting/camera angles etc. to attain 'that look" you're talking about.
It's just a funny misconception that people think magazine cover bodybuilders walk around looking like that... lol..

The take home point from my above message, was the worst advice to follow is when a woman says to not get too big etc.
 
And I said you would definitely find that guy attractive in his every day body. The only reason you said that's gross is because you think guys looking as big/lean as that guy, walk around that lean and veiny looking all year round.. well they don't. It takes weeks of contest prep to cut down body fat levels (very low calorie intake combined with several steroid compounds to trim body fat while maintaining muscle), and you go through a process of carb deloading/loading.. dehydration, sodium intake changes, and then tanning/pump ups combined with lighting/camera angles etc. to attain 'that look" you're talking about.
It's just a funny misconception that people think magazine cover bodybuilders walk around looking like that... lol..

The take home point from my above message, was the worst advice to follow is when a woman says to not get too big etc.

Headdesk. I wasn't talking about everyday body. I was talking about the picture that was provided. I'm well aware comp body does not equal everyday body. But I'll have to disagree, even at non-comp body fat %, that much mass on that body size is too much for me. It's cartoonish.
 
Headdesk. I wasn't talking about everyday body. I was talking about the picture that was provided. I'm well aware comp body does not equal everyday body. But I'll have to disagree, even at non-comp body fat %, that much mass on that body size is too much for me. It's cartoonish.
It came off that way, but either way it's a very common misconception... especially among women.

And are you talking about pro bodybuilders? If so, I agree. They don't do it for girls/women anyway.
Your typical jacked guy who's 180-220lb and lean? Anyone who says they don't like this range of size is most likely lying (I've seen and experienced it).

Anyone below that... well if it's not very obvious that you lift, then you're not by any means considered "jacked."
 
Typical jacked guy at that weight? Sure. But that weight (170-180 or so range even) nd 5'5'' or so is overkill IMO, regardless of BF%. It's all about proportion. My fiancé is about 6ft and 210 lbs, serious Crossfitter, and looks like a BAMF. Someone with his body mass on a small frame would just look bizarre.
 
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Typical jacked guy at that weight? Sure. But that weight and 5'5'' or so is overkill IMO, regardless of BF%. It's all about proportion. My fiancé is about 6ft and 210 lbs, serious Crossfitter, and looks like a BAMF. Someone with his body mass on a small frame would just look bizarre.
Yes which is why I gave a range. It varies based on height. At 5'5 ... being 175-180 would be fine at the top end range.
 
Yes which is why I gave a range. It varies based on height. At 5'5 ... being 175-180 would be fine at the top end range.

I dunno, still seems quite high to me. I dated a 5'7'' guy who was about 180 and even that looked a bit excessive. To each his own I suppose.

Then again I'm 5'4'' and about 120 in peak lifting condition (which is hard to even get to without protein loading, etc), more like 110 when not in training, so I'm easily intimidated in a bad way :laugh:
 
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I dunno, still seems quite high to me. I dated a 5'7'' guy who was about 180 and even that looked a bit excessive. To each his own I suppose.

Then again I'm 5'4'' and about 120 in peak lifting condition (which is hard to even get to without protein loading, etc), more like 110 when not in training, so I'm easily intimidated in a bad way :laugh:

I think we're gonna need to see some pics.
 
This thread has officially now converted into a niche thread. It's really ridiculous to act like people must lift in order to date, or even that lifting improves dating. Most people aren't jacked and, in fact, most people are barely in what I would term any decent shape. If women, for example, were all athletic, we wouldn't have these campaigns about "real" women and conniption fits about the unrealistic views of female beauty. Ditto for guys, most of whom have beer guts and are flabby, even the ones who are active. The argument may, therefore, be "so shouldn't being jacked improve your chances of getting a date?" Not really, since a lot of wimpy guys get dates, too. The past few pages of the thread are now a parody of any real type of advice: get a prostitute, start doing 'roid cycles, and lift. Sounds like you guys are trying to advise the guy into how to break into porn and get AIDS.
 
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hookers can be habit forming. Getting in shape and dressing well doesnt hurt, in fact it helps a ton.
May leslie chow be your guru. He is a doctor you see.
 
This thread has officially now converted into a niche thread. It's really ridiculous to act like people must lift in order to date, or even that lifting improves dating. Most people aren't jacked and, in fact, most people are barely in what I would term any decent shape. If women, for example, were all athletic, we wouldn't have these campaigns about "real" women and conniption fits about the unrealistic views of female beauty. Ditto for guys, most of whom have beer guts and are flabby, even the ones who are active. The argument may, therefore, be "so shouldn't being jacked improve your chances of getting a date?" Not really, since a lot of wimpy guys get dates, too. The past few pages of the thread are now a parody of any real type of advice: get a prostitute, start doing 'roid cycles, and lift. Sounds like you guys are trying to advise the guy into how to break into porn and get AIDS.
looking big and lean = more attractive = higher odds of getting a date
 
OP, if you're honestly thinking about a getting prostitute, you should try www.sponsorforme.com first. It's completely legal so you will not get in trouble and you will get the entire "girlfriend experience".
 
hilarious video about a philipino american explaining why he rides sportsbikes to get girls.
 
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OP, if you're honestly thinking about a getting prostitute, you should try www.sponsorforme.com first. It's completely legal so you will not get in trouble and you will get the entire "girlfriend experience".

I looked at the site and the couple of profiles I looked at were girls who were 21-22 who were willing to be matched up with men as old as 80. I lol'd. That site should just be called imaprostitute.com.
 
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