Gifts from God.

[RustedFox]

I'm trying to offset the balance of threads on here as of late.
A lot of our energy (and rightfully so) is directed at the bleak aspects of EM, including adminstrative oversight, the proliferation of nonsense residencies, etc.
I posted that "good salsa is a gift from God" in a different thread.

This is your place to recognize your gifts from God, but you had better damn well make a good case as to why its a gift from God and not just state "I like Forntnite, lulz."

All submissions are to be judged by myself, and anyone else who wishes to.
But if you're going to judge, then you also best submit, as well.

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[Shabeer]

Duct tape. Great for half assed Sunday repairs at the house. Also treats warts. Obviously gift from God.

 

[thegenius]

Duct tape. Great for half assed Sunday repairs at the house. Also treats warts. Obviously gift from God.

Really? All I have to tell my wart friends who come into the ER is put on duct tape? What then, rip it off? The wart comes off with it?

 

[RustedFox]

Duct tape. Great for half assed Sunday repairs at the house. Also treats warts. Obviously gift from God.

Strong argument.
Approved.

 

[RustedFox]

Really? All I have to tell my wart friends who come into the ER is put on duct tape? What then, rip it off? The wart comes off with it?

For real, homey?
I have self-excised three warts on my thumbs/forefingers with simple duct tape and a boy-scout knife.

 

[Apollyon]

Really? All I have to tell my wart friends who come into the ER is put on duct tape? What then, rip it off? The wart comes off with it?

Yeah, you never heard of this? True story!!

 

[RustedFox]

Yeah, you never heard of this? True story!!

Duct tape for 2-3 days, then alcohol and the knife.
Great for plantar warts, especially.

 

[thegenius]

For real, homey?
I have self-excised three warts on my thumbs/forefingers with simple duct tape and a boy-scout knife.

I've never had a wart so I don't know.

So you just slide the knife parallel right along the skin and pop off the wart? What does the duct tape do?

Is there a youtube video for this? I'm gonna look

 

[RustedFox]

If my submission of 'good salsa' does not qualify me to judge (given, that was the item that generated the thread), then I submit:

The GIANT beanbags (Lovesac, etc, I don't care what brand you bought) are gifts from God when you come home at 6:12 AM and the wife is asleep and you can just climb up to the "office room" and just crash.

 

[RustedFox]

I've never had a wart so I don't know.

So you just slide the knife parallel right along the skin and pop off the wart? What does the duct tape do?

Is there a youtube video for this? I'm gonna look

Dude, dude, dude, dude.

Place duct tape over wart for 2-3 days.
Leave it there; don't eff with it.
Slide knife parallel to skin, slightly downward to "scoop" out the wart.
Works every time.

No joke. The duct tape starves the wart of blood supply (somehow) and renders it dead tissue.
Had a recurrent wart on my right thumb from age (8) to 15. Then, my boy scout homeys had my back.

Boom, suckah.

 

[thegenius]

Dude, dude, dude, dude.

Place duct tape over wart for 2-3 days.
Leave it there; don't eff with it.
Slide knife parallel to skin, slightly downward to "scoop" out the wart.
Works every time.

No joke. The duct tape starves the wart of blood supply (somehow) and renders it dead tissue.
Had a recurrent wart on my right thumb from age (8) to 15. Then, my boy scout homeys had my back.

Boom, suckah.

Man, you gotta make a YouTube presentation for that. I'm predicting close to 100,000 views and maybe even a little bit of money.

Or put it on InstaSnap or something.

 

[RustedFox]

Man, you gotta make a YouTube presentation for that. I'm predicting close to 100,000 views and maybe even a little bit of money.

Or put it on InstaSnap or something.

I hope you're freaking joking, man.

Every redneck kid growing up in Pennsyltucky knows this.

 

[PTPoeny]

A little salicylic acid under the duct tape makes it even more effective. I did do my residency in Pensyltucky... but this was totally covered!

 

[thegenius]

I hope you're freaking joking, man.

Every redneck kid growing up in Pennsyltucky knows this.

LOLZ

I swear I've never heard of this. I'm gonna try it on my 14 yo son.

 

[Apollyon]

LOLZ

I swear I've never heard of this. I'm gonna try it on my 14 yo son.

Dude - major props for a massive thread derailment (and I wrote a (the?) chapter on subway derailments).

 

[thegenius]

I will go.

A gift from God is the man who is my avatar.

A wonderful gift that brought happiness to millions and millions of people for decades, even after his death.

 

[Tenk]

Tacos.

 

[bravotwozero]

The wife. That she's an awesome cook is a plus. The munchkins, though they're annoying, help me stay sane. When I get home from work and they run to give me a hug, I don't give a damn about anything else, no matter how crappy my shift was.

Columbian supremo coffee. Freshly ground and brewed in my french press. No other coffee is as good. That and a little grit will get me through any shift.

 

[Mad Jack]

When I'm in the psych ED my patients seem to come in with meth that they "have no idea" how it got into their system. That sounds like quite the miraculous gift indeed

 

[Fox800]

Queso

 

[RustedFox]

Queso

Your submission is judged as "lamesauce" and needs elaboration.
We all like queso.

 

[RustedFox]

Tacos.

I frequently say:

"If I were left unsupervised, I would eat tacos for every meal."

 

[thegenius]

I like particularly stinky cheese like camembert or epoisses. I think epoisses is from God. Maybe directly from God's blessed rectum but nonetheless you'll take it. If God farted on you you'll take it.

 

[deleted109597]

I frequently say:

"If I were left unsupervised, I would eat tacos for every meal."

This is why Texas is awesome.
I can eat tacos for every meal.

 

[deleted859535]

Continuing with the food/drink theme for the last few posts: excellent beer on tap. Whatever one of your drinks of choice is, finding that on tap, at a well-maintained tap, appropriately chilled, ideally with good company.

Or opening one of your favorite bottles of wine.

 

[Rekt]

Honestly I want to hear more about this Salsa @RustedFox. Probably one of my favorite foods. I need some recs for more restaurant style salsa.

 

[RustedFox]

I will go.

A gift from God is the man who is my avatar.

A wonderful gift that brought happiness to millions and millions of people for decades, even after his death.

Your submission is judged as: insightful and compelling. Thank you for your contribution to this thread.

 

[RustedFox]

Tacos.

Your submission is judged as: incomplete. Please supply supporting details.

 

[RustedFox]

When I'm in the psych ED my patients seem to come in with meth that they "have no idea" how it got into their system. That sounds like quite the miraculous gift indeed

Your submission is judged as: Hilarious and Accurate. Thank you for your contribution to this thread.

 

[RustedFox]

Continuing with the food/drink theme for the last few posts: excellent beer on tap. Whatever one of your drinks of choice is, finding that on tap, at a well-maintained tap, appropriately chilled, ideally with good company.

Or opening one of your favorite bottles of wine.

Your submission is judged as: Accurate and Fulfilling. Thank you for your contribution to this thread.

 

[RustedFox]

Honestly I want to hear more about this Salsa @RustedFox. Probably one of my favorite foods. I need some recs for more restaurant style salsa.

I think the thing that makes the difference between regular salsa and "gift from God" salsa is wether or not you roast/blister your various ingredients before dicing them and combining them with the other ingredients. If you just chop up some peppers, onions, tomatoes, and throw in spices/cilantro, you get salsa rated as a 5/10. Nothing special; but it does the job.

Think this thru with me: Imagine yourself in front of a grill. Charcoal or gas; I don't care. Your entire grill is filled with blistering peppers of your favorite variety. You take one off the grill, blow on it until satisfactorily cool, and then pop the blistering skin-on pepper into your mouth.

That taste is unlike any other in the galaxy.

 

[Tenk]

Your submission is judged as: incomplete. Please supply supporting details.

Street tacos.

 

[RustedFox]

Street tacos.

Thank you for your repeat submission.
Your submission has been judged as: Adequate.
Street tacos are the freaking bomb, and are often made by abuelitas who have lots of "God Points", so anything coming from them is holy.
Thank you for your contribution to this thread.

 

[GeneralVeers]

PICC line nurses still in house when you can't get an IV on the morbidly obese (but completely stable) patient getting admitted.

 

[deleted836128]

I can stop a fight. Any fight. This is a true story of how I stopped my husband from getting into a fight with a drunken stranger who got in his face at a hotel after a wedding we went to. My joyful, tipsy husband and brother in law were in a hotel court yard trying to chase a javelina that was running amock. A drunken dude with a hotel patio nearby jumped in and got in their face and started yelling “Get off my property!” and pushed my husband. My husband jumped in defense mode. Brother in law about to throw down. Angry words flying. I tried pulling on my husband and realized he was pulling back so hard he was seconds away from smacking the dude. So I immediately laid on the ground right next to them and threw my hands and legs flailing in the air like a submissive dog or maybe a dead bug. My husband was confused and stopped what he was doing and the drunk dude was honestly so freaked out he immediately went into his hotel room and locked his patio door.

Works every time.

 

[southerndoc]

I would love to see a video of that.

 

[LaceyMD]

Noise canceling headphones. My neighbors have an uncanny knack for mowing their lawn, jackhammering their driveway, or whatever other hugely noisy nonsense they can think of about 3-4 hours after I get home from a night shift. Every. Freaking. Time. Those headphones are a gift from God.

 

[Shabeer]

I don't know about the street tacos. Really needs elaboration.

Chorizo? With guacamole? From where? I mean, c'mon. You ER guys are terrible with your history taking...

 

[gutonc]

While sitting in a mediocre hotel room on a locums assignment, missing my kid, my partner, my dogs and my cat, I went down a YouTube rabbit hole.

In the spirit of RF's 2 current hot threads, I've got 2 gifts from the Buddha, and both are named Bob.

Bob Mould - Husker Du, Sugar and Solo. Some of the best rock/pop songs of the late 20th century. Still killing it.
Robert Pollard - Guided By Voices. Great at baseline, even better when he puts down the Jack Daniels and just sings.

Seriously, if you're already down, you know what I'm talking about. If not, take 20 minutes and blow your mind.

 

[deleted109597]

I don't know about the street tacos. Really needs elaboration.

Chorizo? With guacamole? From where? I mean, c'mon. You ER guys are terrible with your history taking...

Literally all of them.
Look. I've had pig uterus. Eye. Head.
And while those are a bit "gamey", they're still good.
Nothing beats great pastor a la CDMX though.

 

[Tenk]

I don't know about the street tacos. Really needs elaboration.

Chorizo? With guacamole? From where? I mean, c'mon. You ER guys are terrible with your history taking...

Quit being so damn picky and eat them all.

 

[The Knife & Gun Club]

Credit card loyalty points - been saving them up for 6 years so me and the fiancé can fly first class to Bali for our honey moon.

 

[GeneralVeers]

Credit card loyalty points - been saving them up for 6 years so me and the fiancé can fly first class to Bali for our honey moon.

Make sure you spend them correctly. Don't redeem 600K Amex points for two business class tickets at $0.01 per point. Transfer them to an airline and then your business class ticket will be 50-80K points each.

 

[Groove]

Noise canceling headphones. My neighbors have an uncanny knack for mowing their lawn, jackhammering their driveway, or whatever other hugely noisy nonsense they can think of about 3-4 hours after I get home from a night shift. Every. Freaking. Time. Those headphones are a gift from God.

What kind are they? It's difficult for me to find headphones that are comfortable enough for me to fall asleep.

 

[Dred Pirate]

Good breweries - we have several where it is completely socially acceptable to bring your young chldren (they have playgrounds even) - and get toasted with good friends. Bonus points when the top food trucks show up,

 

[TooMuchResearch]

History taking? I think you mean CT scanning. Anyone here CT tacos?

I don't know about the street tacos. Really needs elaboration.

Chorizo? With guacamole? From where? I mean, c'mon. You ER guys are terrible with your history taking...

 

[RustedFox]

Gotta get back at this.

PICC line nurses still in house when you can't get an IV on the morbidly obese (but completely stable) patient getting admitted.

Your submission is judged as: demonstrably true.
Thank you for your contribution to this thread.

 

[RustedFox]

This will get some hate and I brace myself from the fox’s judgment, but I’ll say emergency medicine is quite a gift for me. Going through medical school feeling somewhat interested in everything but not enough in any one field left me wondering what specialty would continuously provide ridiculous stories, an interesting variety and breadth of medicine to learn about, but still feel like a real doctor making real differences once in a while. I hate this job sometimes. But this job has also saved my life in a way.

Your submission is judged as: nauseating in a Pollyanna fashion, but also entirely true.
Thank you for your submission to this thread.

 

[RustedFox]

I can stop a fight. Any fight. This is a true story of how I stopped my husband from getting into a fight with a drunken stranger who got in his face at a hotel after a wedding we went to. My joyful, tipsy husband and brother in law were in a hotel court yard trying to chase a javelina that was running amock. A drunken dude with a hotel patio nearby jumped in and got in their face and started yelling “Get off my property!” and pushed my husband. My husband jumped in defense mode. Brother in law about to throw down. Angry words flying. I tried pulling on my husband and realized he was pulling back so hard he was seconds away from smacking the dude. So I immediately laid on the ground right next to them and threw my hands and legs flailing in the air like a submissive dog or maybe a dead bug. My husband was confused and stopped what he was doing and the drunk dude was honestly so freaked out he immediately went into his hotel room and locked his patio door.

Works every time.

Your submission is judged as: Not at all a Gift from God, but clever nonetheless. And what the hell is a Javelina?
Thank you for your contribution to this thread.

 

[RustedFox]

Noise canceling headphones. My neighbors have an uncanny knack for mowing their lawn, jackhammering their driveway, or whatever other hugely noisy nonsense they can think of about 3-4 hours after I get home from a night shift. Every. Freaking. Time. Those headphones are a gift from God.

Your submission is judged as: A Gift from God. I bought my wife a similar pair, and she is thankful.
Thank you for your contribution to this thread.