"Funny quotes from 'less informed' pre-meds," On-Topic Edition

[freak7]

i won't be able to sleep until someone explains this joke to me

"Would she have to basically be a 10?"

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[Matthew9Thirtyfive]

i won't be able to sleep until someone explains this joke to me

It's a proof using the epsilon-delta definition of limits on functions of a single variable to show that a limit exists (or doesn't exist). So he's asking if there is a delta small enough that for every epsilon greater than zero, a PA student at a community college would have to be a 10 (or around a 10).

 

[JB50]

Some of you need to get off the computer for a while

 

[Neuro25_]

Not uninformed, but still funny. This one's courtesy of that "Timehop" app from which everyone's been posting things (at least on my Facebook feed). A year ago today I was but an enthusiastic unregistered SDN lurker, so I wouldn't have posted this in the other thread.

Orgo friend: "Yeah, doesn't cyanide mess with your midi-chlorians?"
Me: "Midi-chlorians."
Orgo friend: "Yeah. The electron transport—"
Me: "Midi-chlorians are from Star Wars."
Orgo friend: "...mitochondria. I'm tired, okay?"

He actually was just tired. Orgo friend beat me on the MCAT by three points, and it was deserved.

Not surprised, cyanide

Less funny and more of a strange trend I've noticed recently with people not understanding that medical school=training to be a physician (as opposed to nurse, MA, etc)

Young bartender: So what do you do?
Me: Right now I do research at a children's hospital, but I'm starting medical school in August
Her: Really?? I'm in medical school too!
Me (she had just said she was 20 and didn't strike me as the brightest pint glass on her bar's shelf, so I was skeptical): No way! What school?
Her: Suffolk Community College (something like that)
Me (probing): I didn't know they had a medical school.....
Her: Yeah, I'm in the medical assistant program
Me: Ahhhhhh

It just blows my mind that some people don't know this. Even before I knew anything about healthcare I feel like my friends/extended family and I at least understood the basic concept of medical school= you are going to be a physician

I got a job at an insurance company after acceptance to get some money before moving to med school. The training process consisted of me sitting next to one of the team members in the company and shadowing what they do. This team Member asks me what my goals were and my past work experience:

Team Member: what did you do before coming here?
Me: I graduated from college, volunteered a little and am going to medical school in the fall.
Team Member: I went to medical school!
Me: Cool, what school? (now with extreme skepticism because A) why are you here now? B) this particular girl had been with the company for 2 years C) She was in the position beneath the one i was hired for))
Team member: Community college had it, was only 14 months! You should look into it!
Me: (gently smiles) no thank you

*she went to Med Tech school ☹️

 

[bioboy23]

Team member: Community college had it, was only 14 months! You should look into it!
Me: (gently smiles) no thank you

I would've cringed so hard they probably would've fired me on the spot

 

[sweepsingle33]

Not surprised, cyanide


I got a job at an insurance company after acceptance to get some money before moving to med school. The training process consisted of me sitting next to one of the team members in the company and shadowing what they do. This team Member asks me what my goals were and my past work experience:

Team Member: what did you do before coming here?
Me: I graduated from college, volunteered a little and am going to medical school in the fall.
Team Member: I went to medical school!
Me: Cool, what school? (now with extreme skepticism because A) why are you here now? B) this particular girl had been with the company for 2 years C) She was in the position beneath the one i was hired for))
Team member: Community college had it, was only 14 months! You should look into it!
Me: (gently smiles) no thank you

*she went to Med Tech school ☹️

I don't understand how people are so naive. It makes my soul cringe.

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[mfrey28]

Not surprised, cyanide


I got a job at an insurance company after acceptance to get some money before moving to med school. The training process consisted of me sitting next to one of the team members in the company and shadowing what they do. This team Member asks me what my goals were and my past work experience:

Team Member: what did you do before coming here?
Me: I graduated from college, volunteered a little and am going to medical school in the fall.
Team Member: I went to medical school!
Me: Cool, what school? (now with extreme skepticism because A) why are you here now? B) this particular girl had been with the company for 2 years C) She was in the position beneath the one i was hired for))
Team member: Community college had it, was only 14 months! You should look into it!
Me: (gently smiles) no thank you

*she went to Med Tech school ☹️

I work as an MA and even some people in healthcare don't understand that med school=physician. When I told people I worked with that I was pursuing med school the assumption was that I wanted to go to PA school. Some people assumed that meant nursing school, but there is also the idea where I work that all MA's secretly wish they were nurses and want to go to nursing school.

 

[SydSing]

I work as an MA and even some people in healthcare don't understand that med school=physician. When I told people I worked with that I was pursuing med school the assumption was that I wanted to go to PA school. Some people assumed that meant nursing school, but there is also the idea where I work that all MA's secretly wish they were nurses and want to go to nursing school.

I worked in an office where I was close with a lot of the MAs. That idea was common there too. Though, I would say that at least 70% of them were trying or had tried to get into nursing school.

 

[PatchA]

I work as an MA and even some people in healthcare don't understand that med school=physician. When I told people I worked with that I was pursuing med school the assumption was that I wanted to go to PA school. Some people assumed that meant nursing school, but there is also the idea where I work that all MA's secretly wish they were nurses and want to go to nursing school.

If I had a dollar for every time a patient asked me (in response to finding out that I am going to Med school) "That's nice. To do what? Nursing? NP?" I could pay for Med School.

One pt also told me that her son was in Med school. Later turned out~vet school. Like, what? Cool, but just not the same thing.

Edit: subject- verb agreement

 

[Runner500]

Not really about an uniformed premed, but extremely funny nonetheless...

I was volunteering at a clinic when a resident asked me if I would serve as witness during a prostate exam. Try and put yourself in the already awkward situation that is a prostate exam.

I'll paint the picture... small clinic room, 3 dudes, one of which is preparing to bend over and pull his pants down.

Resident: "have you ever had this test done before?"
Patient: "yeah, a while ago"
Resident: "Ok, well I'm just going to explain the procedure real quick. You're going to lean over on this table, I'm going to put the lube on my finger, you're then going to bear down, and then I'll insert my penis."
Me:

Seconds later laughing ensues for a minute or more. The resident wasn't making a completely inappropriate joke, it just came out, and it sounded so serious and in context I didn't catch it immediately. Needless to say, I was unexpectedly happy I got to be in the room to witness it. I hope this wasn't a "had to be there" kind of moment.

 

[P0ke]

Resident: "Ok, well I'm just going to explain the procedure real quick. You're going to lean over on this table, I'm going to put the lube on my finger, you're then going to bear down, and then I'll insert my penis."

I must've missed that section in Bates

 

[Breonna]

I'm a second freshman semester I just finished . First semester I made All As and one B , this semester I made two As , one B, and Two Cs. Gpa was a 3.7 first semester and now it will possibly be a 3.3 , isnthere anyway I can raise my gpa back up ?

 

[Runner500]

I'm a second freshman semester I just finished . First semester I made All As and one B , this semester I made two As , one B, and Two Cs. Gpa was a 3.7 first semester and now it will possibly be a 3.3 , isnthere anyway I can raise my gpa back up ?

 

[Matthew9Thirtyfive]

I'm a second freshman semester I just finished . First semester I made All As and one B , this semester I made two As , one B, and Two Cs. Gpa was a 3.7 first semester and now it will possibly be a 3.3 , isnthere anyway I can raise my gpa back up ?

Wrong thread. Start a new thread or do a search. Unless this was an ironic post.

 

[pseud0]

Resident: "Ok, well I'm just going to explain the procedure real quick. You're going to lean over on this table, I'm going to put the lube on my finger, you're then going to bear down, and then I'll insert my penis."

this kind of slip of the tongue mistake actually scares me because what if you say something like that by accident and then the patient gets mad

 

[B_52]

People have gotten a Ph.D in a month before. It's not impossible

IN A MONTH?? just purely out of curiosity do you happen to have a periodical or some sort of reference on this?

 

[B_52]

agreed, but I feel like @Jalby was being targeted by the closing of the other thread. Whatever decision is made - there should be consistency

Maybe one of the mods is/was a member of one of the administrations that were being bashed and they took it personally lol. This one has probably stayed open because it's just the "rabble rabble" among the nobody from nowhere premeds and not potentially damaging to any institutions that co-benefit with SDN.

 

[B_52]

Once had a class with someone who wanted to go to the local state medical school, but didn't have the grades as it's a pretty competitive one. Instead of taking a post-bac or making concrete effort to establish and upward trend he said "I'm just going to go to the Caribbean for a year and transfer back". To give this a bit of context he was speaking with the assumption that transferring between medical schools is the same and as common/easy as it is to move around UG institutions. What's worse is he got super defensive and metaphorically plugged his ears when I tried to inform him otherwise.

 

[B_52]

. typo*

 

[DoctorSwagger]

Friend- " dude Have you considered DO, I know a couple of kids who are robots at slu and washu and none got into an MD program"

Me- "there is more to an application than just the gpa, how was everything else in their application?"

Friend-"..................you don't understand these kids where the best in high school, you won't get in"

Me- "ok"



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[DoctorSwagger]

One more-

Another friend- "dude what the heck why did you take the bio credit, medical schools really don't want you to skip that"

Me-" I'm majoring in bio dude, I'm skipping gen bio and taking more difficult bio classes instead"

Friend- " let's face it your not our friend (enter smart dude here) you can't get away with skipping gen bio your gonna have to take it at some point "

Me-


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[Lawpy]

Chemistry can be fun!

 

[Neuro25_]

I would've cringed so hard they probably would've fired me on the spot

To be honest were I an adcom I would actively look for someone experiencing a significant setback. Whether that's a low grade (not a string of them of course but a setback) or a personal failure. I have serious doubts in a decent chunk of premeds that they can handle failure, and medicine will certainly be filled with personal, heartbreaking failures.

After having gone through an interview cycle, I can honestly tell you that schools DO look for resilience and perseverance. It is very obvious who has it and who does not.

 

[Neuro25_]

Just some background: There are 4 MD schools in our state and 1 DO school. The "X" school mentioned below is the 3rd best school in our state, which any informed pre-med from our university would be ecstatic to get into.

Oh btw this girl is a junior and is I think one year older than me. I think she's 21 or something. One would think she would have figured out how hard it is to get accepted into even one med school by now...

After our Kaplan on site MCAT course:
Me: So what medical schools are you going to apply to?
Pre-med girl: Y and Z schools (1st and 2nd med school in our state)
Me: You're not going to apply to X school?
Pre-med girl: No, I asked them and was told they don't do research so I'm not applying.
Me: Oh okay....

The X school does have research at their medical school, they're just not research-focused like some medical schools are. And she got a 482 (equivalent to a 10 on the old mcat I think) on her mcat diagnostic....

MCAT diagnostic score means absolutely nothing.

 

[emmyb]

Ran into this guy that all of us pre-med majors can't stand in the hall the day of an exam in Organic Chem.
Keep in mind that he hasn't showed up to class since the last exam and we all figured he was going to take an F so he could retake.

Him: Hey, are you ready to fail this ochem exam?
Me: No, I've been studying hard and feel pretty good. Why haven't you come to class lately?
Him: Oh, I have been trying to focus on the classes I can get A's and B's in so I haven't had time to come to class. Anyways, Ochem isn't that important.
Me: Hmmm, well you know Ochem is on the MCAT?
Him: It's fine, I don't need to do well on the MCAT anyway...That's not that important for med school.

Found out he has a 2.2 GPA and is failing ochem, so I'm not sure when he is going to realize that med school is not in his near future...

 

[DoctorSwagger]

Ran into this guy that all of us pre-med majors can't stand in the hall the day of an exam in Organic Chem.
Keep in mind that he hasn't showed up to class since the last exam and we all figured he was going to take an F so he could retake.

Him: Hey, are you ready to fail this ochem exam?
Me: No, I've been studying hard and feel pretty good. Why haven't you come to class lately?
Him: Oh, I have been trying to focus on the classes I can get A's and B's in so I haven't had time to come to class. Anyways, Ochem isn't that important.
Me: Hmmm, well you know Ochem is on the MCAT?
Him: It's fine, I don't need to do well on the MCAT anyway...That's not that important for med school.

Found out he has a 2.2 GPA and is failing ochem, so I'm not sure when he is going to realize that med school is not in his near future...

I bet he's also gunning for pediatric neurosurgery


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[Neuro25_]

Freshman Pre-med: So what schools are you going to apply to?
Me: I'm only going to apply to the 10 Texas medical schools.
Pre-med: That's it?! My minimum is going to be 60.
Me:

Good luck not shooting yourself during all of those secondaries...[/QUOTE

& Good luck paying a trillion dollars for not reason.

 

[JB50]

Ran into this guy that all of us pre-med majors can't stand in the hall the day of an exam in Organic Chem.
Keep in mind that he hasn't showed up to class since the last exam and we all figured he was going to take an F so he could retake.

Him: Hey, are you ready to fail this ochem exam?
Me: No, I've been studying hard and feel pretty good. Why haven't you come to class lately?
Him: Oh, I have been trying to focus on the classes I can get A's and B's in so I haven't had time to come to class. Anyways, Ochem isn't that important.
Me: Hmmm, well you know Ochem is on the MCAT?
Him: It's fine, I don't need to do well on the MCAT anyway...That's not that important for med school.

Found out he has a 2.2 GPA and is failing ochem, so I'm not sure when he is going to realize that med school is not in his near future...

Dat MCAT line was weak. OChem is about 0.05% of the MCAT boss.

But lol at his logical thinking 10/10

 

[CharlieBillings]

Dat MCAT line was weak. OChem is about 0.05% of the MCAT boss.

But lol at his logical thinking 10/10

Wow has it really changed that much? I took the old MCAT and it was 50% of one entire section. Which makes it like 15% overall content!

 

[Neuro25_]

Wow has it really changed that much? I took the old MCAT and it was 50% of one entire section. Which makes it like 15% overall content!

Yes but the misconception that there is little Orgo is not actually true. Now that the MCAT has biochem there are plenty of integrated organic chemistry questions in both Chen/phys and biological science, you may even see it in the psych section! It's crucial to overall understanding of passages. The only subject that one could safely skate by without a good foundation is physics because it is localized to one section.

 

[JB50]

Yes but the misconception that there is little Orgo is not actually true. Now that the MCAT has biochem there are plenty of integrated organic chemistry questions in both Chen/phys and biological science, you may even see it in the psych section! It's crucial to overall understanding of passages. The only subject that one could safely skate by without a good foundation is physics because it is localized to one section.

The other misconception is that you need to hammer home ochem because it's on the MCAT and will show up in every section.

It's found outright in one section, in which it will be advantageous to be simply familiar with it. The other sections are more or less "I've heard of this before."


Even then the AAMC says orgo is like 15% of the material that MAY be covered in questions on the exam...



Just don't freak out about Ochem everyone and you'll be totally prepared by just studying biochemical concepts.


Also I'm just going to throw in that physics is a lot more than people realize on the exam

 

[Neuro25_]

The other misconception is that you need to hammer home ochem because it's on the MCAT and will show up in every section.

It's found outright in one section, in which it will be advantageous to be simply familiar with it. The other sections are more or less "I've heard of this before."


Even then the AAMC says orgo is like 15% of the material that MAY be covered in questions on the exam...



Just don't freak out about Ochem everyone and you'll be totally prepared by just studying biochemical concepts.


Also I'm just going to throw in that physics is a lot more than people realize on the exam

I understand what you are saying but I am speaking from experience as my specific test and a few of my collueges tests were orgo concept based/biochem heavy.

In terms of overall science comprehension, organic chemistry and it's ability to build from gen Chem and into biochemical processes, is much more relevant than physics, for the MCAT.

In my opinion, much more important to understand orgo.

 

[Blessthefall]

I understand what you are saying but I am speaking from experience as my specific test and a few of my collueges tests were orgo concept based/biochem heavy.

In terms of overall science comprehension, organic chemistry and it's ability to build from gen Chem and into biochemical processes, is much more relevant than physics, for the MCAT.

In my opinion, much more important to understand orgo.

I can recall only two questions that explicitly asked about OChem- the rest were BioChem. Just my experience.

 

[JB50]

I understand what you are saying but I am speaking from experience as my specific test and a few of my collueges tests were orgo concept based/biochem heavy.

In terms of overall science comprehension, organic chemistry and it's ability to build from gen Chem and into biochemical processes, is much more relevant than physics, for the MCAT.

In my opinion, much more important to understand orgo.

We disagree mane it's a free world. Not every exam is the same too so most of us have n=1 or 2. I was able to go from a 503 to a 512 and that didn't consist of studying orgo.

 

[DOCzilla15]

I went back to my undergraduate university for st Patrick's day and after the festivities our group stopped at a restaurant where I had the pleasure (sarcasm) of sitting across from a current pre-med junior.

Him after talking about how he's a genius and has the stock market figured out: yeah you know I made 16,000 last month and it's easy it's so easy I could be a millionaire by the end of the year but I just really wanna help people you know.
Me: wow how noble of you, so are you maintaining a good gpa? And doing ecs?

Him: ha yeah I have a 4.0 I barely study honestly I study the stock market more and I don't really feel I need ecs

Me: oh wow that's great who did you have for Orgo I couldn't imagine getting an A with professor x... also if you wanted to help ppl why not volunteer and show your interest?

Him: oh well yeah I mean Orgo was my one A- besides that I have a 4.0

Girl next to him: what about biochem? Didn't you get a B

Him: yeah just those two besides that I have a 4.0... and I mean when schools see I gave up the potential for easy millions in the stock market they'll know I'll really want to help people

Me: uhhhmmmm I don't know about that but have you started studying for the mcat/ know when you're going to take it?

Him: ahh I'll probably take it in the summer sometime and I'm not gonna study I don't really believe in studying for a specific text

Me: do you know what the mcat is? I wouldn't do that

Him: listen you wouldn't understand it's not that big of a deal ...

The whole time he was speaking so confidently and arrogantly at the end I didn't even have it in me to tell him I had just been accepted myself. Oh the other thing was, he ordered no food just talked about how he knew people would finish theirs and that he could get a free meal out of it... all of this from a guy who supposedly made 16,000 just last month from the stock market....

 

[sweepsingle33]

I understand what you are saying but I am speaking from experience as my specific test and a few of my collueges tests were orgo concept based/biochem heavy.

In terms of overall science comprehension, organic chemistry and it's ability to build from gen Chem and into biochemical processes, is much more relevant than physics, for the MCAT.

In my opinion, much more important to understand orgo.

+1 I agree with this. Just because a small fraction of the test is questions that are exclusively orgo based doesn't mean that it isn't crucial to understand the concepts of orgo that lay the foundation for understanding biochem which is easily the most heavily tested subject on the exam. Biochem is applied orgo so the two are not mutually exclusive entities.

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[jqueb29]

I understand what you are saying but I am speaking from experience as my specific test and a few of my collueges tests were orgo concept based/biochem heavy.

In terms of overall science comprehension, organic chemistry and it's ability to build from gen Chem and into biochemical processes, is much more relevant than physics, for the MCAT.

In my opinion, much more important to understand orgo.

And neither of them will be relevant once you're in medical school. Got to love the pointlessness that is most of the pre-med process.

 

[sweepsingle33]

And neither of them will be relevant once you're in medical school. Got to love the pointlessness that is most of the pre-med process.

There is biochem in medical school lol

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[sammiesings]

Geez people, there are plenty of MCAT threads where you can debate which of you is right. This thread, however, not the place for it.

 

[Neuro25_]

It was a horrible experience. Kind of terrified to live with classmates during medical school for this reason, I will most likely live alone... Do most students do this?

No, in fact study groups are highly recommended in medical school and most students do cling to one another easily. The pre med numbers based hubris culture is very silly because MOST (I can only speak for the ones I have researched during my cycle) medical schools try very hard TO repeatedly foster teamwork which strongly correlates to the team setting that is crucial in the healthcare field. (nurses, scrub techs, PA's, doctors, you name it)

 

[jqueb29]

There is biochem in medical school lol

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Sorry didn't notice the biochem part, the 'both' I was referencing were organic chem and physics, which as someone about to finish up MS3, I have encountered precisely zero situations where an O chem or physics course was necessary. There are rudimentary physics concepts here and there, but nothing at all that requires an actual college physics course (i.e., I didn't need 2 semesters of physics to comprehend when I was taught in my cardiovascular course that blood flows from high pressure to low pressure). As for O chem? Lol literally never encountered anything where even a shrivel of knowledge was needed. Definitely do have to remember a bunch of biochem pathways for your metabolism course and Step 1, but not even one time have I needed the associated O chem knowledge that goes along with the pathways.

 

[Princeton Medical Student]

I went back to my undergraduate university for st Patrick's day and after the festivities our group stopped at a restaurant where I had the pleasure (sarcasm) of sitting across from a current pre-med junior.

Him after talking about how he's a genius and has the stock market figured out: yeah you know I made 16,000 last month and it's easy it's so easy I could be a millionaire by the end of the year but I just really wanna help people you know.
Me: wow how noble of you, so are you maintaining a good gpa? And doing ecs?

Him: ha yeah I have a 4.0 I barely study honestly I study the stock market more and I don't really feel I need ecs

Me: oh wow that's great who did you have for Orgo I couldn't imagine getting an A with professor x... also if you wanted to help ppl why not volunteer and show your interest?

Him: oh well yeah I mean Orgo was my one A- besides that I have a 4.0

Girl next to him: what about biochem? Didn't you get a B

Him: yeah just those two besides that I have a 4.0... and I mean when schools see I gave up the potential for easy millions in the stock market they'll know I'll really want to help people

Me: uhhhmmmm I don't know about that but have you started studying for the mcat/ know when you're going to take it?

Him: ahh I'll probably take it in the summer sometime and I'm not gonna study I don't really believe in studying for a specific text

Me: do you know what the mcat is? I wouldn't do that

Him: listen you wouldn't understand it's not that big of a deal ...

The whole time he was speaking so confidently and arrogantly at the end I didn't even have it in me to tell him I had just been accepted myself. Oh the other thing was, he ordered no food just talked about how he knew people would finish theirs and that he could get a free meal out of it... all of this from a guy who supposedly made 16,000 just last month from the stock market....

My bet is that you wont find him on the deans list lol

 

[DOCzilla15]

My bet is that you wont find him on the deans list lol

It was one of the most insufferable moments of my life lol

 

[BamaNicole]

And neither of them will be relevant once you're in medical school. Got to love the pointlessness that is most of the pre-med process.

I've used O Chem in med school.

 

[libertyyne]

I've used O Chem in med school.

What did you use it for ?

 

[SpaceyWacey]

No, in fact study groups are highly recommended in medical school and most students do cling to one another easily. The pre med numbers based hubris culture is very silly because MOST (I can only speak for the ones I have researched during my cycle) medical schools try very hard TO repeatedly foster teamwork which strongly correlates to the team setting that is crucial in the healthcare field. (nurses, scrub techs, PA's, doctors, you name it)

But there is a very clear difference between living with classmates and doing group work with them. You can live alone as a medical student and still be a wonderful teammate during group work.

 

[JB50]

What did you use it for ?

Ethanol breakdown...

Cuz we already learned itt that it's related to biochem lol

 

[BamaNicole]

What did you use it for ?

Pharmacological mechanism of a drug.

 

[Lawpy]

I've used O Chem in med school.

Pharmacological mechanism of a drug.

Did you focus on how stuff like how functional groups move during the metabolic processes? Or did you have to recall any specific organic chemistry reactions and mechanisms?

 

[B_52]

I dated a fellow pre med once. She used to lay around all day in bed watching Netflix (no idea how she looked so good with that kind of lifestyle).

I ended up breaking up with her for the obvious conflict in lifestyle right after we sent out our primaries. She berated me for my practical list of state and DO schools and how I was only going to drag her down because she applied only to ivy leaguers. Needless to say I checked in on her Facebook the other day and she has finally been given a "prestigious offer" at AU Antigua after "turning down Penn for personal reasons" last year.


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