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Only happens on r/tinder
Not sure why I'm getting quoted there, I didn't say that...
Only happens on r/tinder
lol what do you even mean? (bolded)more like 8.5 . But any boost for men is welcome. options go up exponentially after lag phase up to say 7 or 7.5
Also a lot of dating is based on friend family referral, especially more serious stuff. Seen doctors recommended way more often and more strongly. It's just an easier sell.
I think your reasoning is off. I've seen way too many drop dead gorgeous women married to below average looking guys. And the guys arent rich. Even in my class, the best looking dudes are dating down if you just consider looks. Looks only get you a look, and to be honest as long as your average looking youll be fine, its more your personality/sociability. take me for example. i have basically no friends (my social life is literally talking to the residents im on service with), a good number of the girls in my class think im weird, i have minimal social skills, and have been told i look and act like a sociopath by my classmates, yet have been hit on by 4 girls and 1 guy in the past 2 years inside the hospital im at. it means im at least somewhat attractive if i get hit on in the workplace, yet those interactions went no where because im ******ed, and i have no idea how to talk to women even when theyre interested. looks alone dont work. Even on tinder thats how it is- you can be attractive but if you have bad photos or give off a bad vibe you wont match- I saw this happen to a really good looking guy i know. my ex girlfriend of one week (literally) was very attractive, but she was possibly even weirder than me, which is why we worked out. but i dumped her because im ******ed, never even had sex with her, and then when i tried to get her back she rejected me. forget dating a hot girl, even the ugliest girl probably wont date me until i fix my social skills which i have no idea how im going to do. i can keep it together in a professional environment so ill get into my specialty, and im one of the richest people in my class, yet im in this predicament.lol what do you even mean? (bolded)
And sure but referrals to who? Girls who can't find a guy on their own? That only happens if they're unattractive or carry red flags. Any half decent girl can have a few dozen options within one hour on tinder. These will include plenty of educated men + men with lots of money + very good looking guys. You don't think she'll be picky? Now imagine how picky a very attractive girl is if she also has a decent personality/job. And the first thing she's picky about is the man's looks.
I think your reasoning is off. I've seen way too many drop dead gorgeous women married to below average looking guys. And the guys arent rich. Even in my class, the best looking dudes are dating down if you just consider looks. Looks only get you a look, and to be honest as long as your average looking youll be fine, its more your personality/sociability. take me for example. i have basically no friends (my social life is literally talking to the residents im on service with), a good number of the girls in my class think im weird, i have minimal social skills, and have been told i look and act like a sociopath by my classmates, yet have been hit on by 4 girls and 1 guy in the past 2 years inside the hospital im at. it means im at least somewhat attractive if i get hit on in the workplace, yet those interactions went no where because im ******ed, and i have no idea how to talk to women even when theyre interested. looks alone dont work. Even on tinder thats how it is- you can be attractive but if you have bad photos or give off a bad vibe you wont match- I saw this happen to a really good looking guy i know. my ex girlfriend of one week (literally) was very attractive, but she was possibly even weirder than me, which is why we worked out. but i dumped her because im ******ed, never even had sex with her, and then when i tried to get her back she rejected me. forget dating a hot girl, even the ugliest girl probably wont date me until i fix my social skills which i have no idea how im going to do. i can keep it together in a professional environment so ill get into my specialty, and im one of the richest people in my class, yet im in this predicament.
As for the nurse, i think she thinks im taken or not interested, because shes no longer looking at me. i think i might ask the female resident im on service with to help me out with her.
So youre saying that every attractive girl whos with an average or below average guy has baggage/issues? I dont buy that.You're getting a couple things wrong. A lot of men look very masculine (even without any facial hair) which makes them look unappealing to males but very appealing to females.
You're right that social skills are very important and that you fail without them. But if you aren't above average in looks or masculine looking, you have virtually zero chance with an attractive girl unless she has issues (ex. insecurity, common). You see mismatched couples but don't realize that the woman is carrying serious baggage along with other major issues.
As for the nurse, i think she thinks im taken or not interested, because shes no longer looking at me. i think i might ask the female resident im on service with to help me out with her.
You're getting a couple things wrong. A lot of men look very masculine (even without any facial hair) which makes them look unappealing to males but very appealing to females.
You're right that social skills are very important and that you fail without them. But if you aren't above average in looks or masculine looking, you have virtually zero chance with an attractive girl unless she has issues (ex. insecurity, common). You see mismatched couples but don't realize that the woman is carrying serious baggage along with other major issues.
I'm saying that attractive girls with those guys are very infrequent (and yes those ones do usually have issues). You probably just pick them out sharply then remember them while ignoring the fact that almost every attractive girl you see is with an equally attractive guy.So youre saying that every attractive girl whos with an average or below average guy has baggage/issues? I dont buy that.
I think your reasoning is off. I've seen way too many drop dead gorgeous women married to below average looking guys. And the guys arent rich. Even in my class, the best looking dudes are dating down if you just consider looks. Looks only get you a look, and to be honest as long as your average looking youll be fine, its more your personality/sociability. take me for example. i have basically no friends (my social life is literally talking to the residents im on service with), a good number of the girls in my class think im weird, i have minimal social skills, and have been told i look and act like a sociopath by my classmates, yet have been hit on by 4 girls and 1 guy in the past 2 years inside the hospital im at. it means im at least somewhat attractive if i get hit on in the workplace, yet those interactions went no where because im ******ed, and i have no idea how to talk to women even when theyre interested. looks alone dont work. Even on tinder thats how it is- you can be attractive but if you have bad photos or give off a bad vibe you wont match- I saw this happen to a really good looking guy i know. my ex girlfriend of one week (literally) was very attractive, but she was possibly even weirder than me, which is why we worked out. but i dumped her because im ******ed, never even had sex with her, and then when i tried to get her back she rejected me. forget dating a hot girl, even the ugliest girl probably wont date me until i fix my social skills which i have no idea how im going to do. i can keep it together in a professional environment so ill get into my specialty, and im one of the richest people in my class, yet im in this predicament.
As for the nurse, i think she thinks im taken or not interested, because shes no longer looking at me. i think i might ask the female resident im on service with to help me out with her.
lol what do you even mean? (bolded)
And sure but referrals to who? Girls who can't find a guy on their own? That only happens if they're unattractive or carry red flags. Any half decent girl can have a few dozen options within one hour on tinder. These will include plenty of educated men + men with lots of money + very good looking guys. You don't think she'll be picky? Now imagine how picky a very attractive girl is if she also has a decent personality/job. And the first thing she's picky about is the man's looks.
He fits the profile of a crystal meth dealer ....just saying
But if you aren't above average in looks or masculine looking, you have virtually zero chance with an attractive girl unless she has issues
This is something all decent men need to truly hear and understand.
When it comes to actual serious relationships there are lots of factors that can actually give the “average dude” a good chance at attractive women.
and women as well
“I think the American public has heard so much about the sexual activities and the sex lives of these individuals, and we’ve sort of become cynical and sort of said, ‘Well, if he did it, maybe that’s OK; they all do it.’” - Anita Hill, USA Today
Anita Hill is not Hollywood’s answer to Harvey Weinstein. 'They all do it' defense of Clinton doesn't fly.
There is so much more to a successful LTR other than looks. Yes looks initiate the transaction but what comes out of the mouth and eventually their heart, assuming they have one, allows the young relationship to proceed.
If anything Tindr and the many other hookup apps have proven that looks dont lead to a successful LTR.
OP you might consider that the Nurse you are eyeing might find you attractive for reasons other than looks.
Well like I said shes not eyeing me anymore. And she was always busy/running around when I wasnt with my team (shes new), so I never really got a chance to talk to her. I dont think flirting with a nurse would have looked good in front of the attending or residents. I will update you guys if I find another cute nurse, since my hospital is full of them. Btw, on an unrelated note the patient care associates are pretty cool. I was thirsty for cranberry juice so I asked him for one and he came back with cranberry juice and ginger ale.
Well shes not eyeing me anymore. And she was always busy/running around when I wasnt with my team (shes new), so I never really got a chance to talk to her. Its really unfortunate that I have to meet women this way, because Im in a small city without a very good night life, and tinder just doesnt work for me. I will update you guys if I find another cute nurse, since my hospital is full of them. Btw, on an unrelated note the patient care associates are pretty cool. I was thirsty for cranberry juice so I asked him for one and he came back with cranberry juice and ginger ale.
Because she was working and he was just chilling at the nurses station. He was so good about it though. Got me a cup filled with ice too, and then saluted me after I thanked him. Hes got a career in the service industry for sure. I did another cam show today for kicks, and I've realized I could probably make decent pocket money doing this.So you have given up on women and now you switched to men?
Why didnt you ask the Nurse for Cranberry Juice, Ginger Ale or KY Jelly?
Make sure to use Truvada
Because she was working and he was just chilling at the nurses station. He was so good about it though. Got me a cup filled with ice too, and then saluted me after I thanked him. Hes got a career in the service industry for sure. I did another cam show today for kicks, and I've realized I could probably make decent pocket money doing this.
Dude, that quote is from the Office.So many SDN feminist extremists are being triggered as they read this comment. I, on the other hand, am dying of laughter.
LMAO
Tell her casually "I need help with my diagnosis. My heart beats fast when I see you, but it subsides when you're not around. Can you tell me what I have".
Because she was working and he was just chilling at the nurses station. He was so good about it though. Got me a cup filled with ice too, and then saluted me after I thanked him. Hes got a career in the service industry for sure. I did another cam show today for kicks, and I've realized I could probably make decent pocket money doing this.
Well today was my last day on the rotation and unfortunately it was super busy, but I finally talked to her after I asked her a question about a patient, and she was nice and smiled and showed me the info in the chart. Later I was working at the nurses station and she was working at a mobile station, and I guess she made a mistake because she cursed pretty loudly, and I just look at her and laugh, and she starts blushing hard and laughs. I got called away by my resident on consults and her shift ended, but it wasnt a complete loss. If I had a couple more days I think I would have asked her out. You have to realize I'm socially autistic, and shes really hot (she looks like leighton meester), so this was progress and talking to hot nurses in the future wont be hard anymore.What's going on here? Stop derailing your own thread!
So all I read here is that you let an opportunity slip through your fingers... it’s all right, there will be other pretty women to cross your path.Well today was my last day on the rotation and unfortunately it was super busy, but I finally talked to her after I asked her a question about a patient, and she was nice and smiled and showed me the info in the chart. Later I was working at the nurses station and she was working at a mobile station, and I guess she made a mistake because she cursed pretty loudly, and I just look at her and laugh, and she starts blushing hard and laughs. I got called away by my resident on consults and her shift ended, but it wasnt a complete loss. If I had a couple more days I think I would have asked her out. You have to realize I'm socially autistic, and shes really hot (she looks like leighton meester), so this was progress and talking to hot nurses in the future wont be hard anymore.
Well today was my last day on the rotation and unfortunately it was super busy, but I finally talked to her after I asked her a question about a patient, and she was nice and smiled and showed me the info in the chart. Later I was working at the nurses station and she was working at a mobile station, and I guess she made a mistake because she cursed pretty loudly, and I just look at her and laugh, and she starts blushing hard and laughs. I got called away by my resident on consults and her shift ended, but it wasnt a complete loss. If I had a couple more days I think I would have asked her out. You have to realize I'm socially autistic, and shes really hot (she looks like leighton meester), so this was progress and talking to hot nurses in the future wont be hard anymore.
Try thinking about it this way next time: whats the worst that can happen if you try? You get rejected. Maybe if shes a bitch other people will find out and talk about you.Well today was my last day on the rotation and unfortunately it was super busy, but I finally talked to her after I asked her a question about a patient, and she was nice and smiled and showed me the info in the chart. Later I was working at the nurses station and she was working at a mobile station, and I guess she made a mistake because she cursed pretty loudly, and I just look at her and laugh, and she starts blushing hard and laughs. I got called away by my resident on consults and her shift ended, but it wasnt a complete loss. If I had a couple more days I think I would have asked her out. You have to realize I'm socially autistic, and shes really hot (she looks like leighton meester), so this was progress and talking to hot nurses in the future wont be hard anymore.
But not as pretty as she was.So all I read here is that you let an opportunity slip through your fingers... it’s all right, there will be other pretty women to cross your path.
It sounds logical but from my perspective its foreign to me, and I realize I'll have to eventually do that.Try thinking about it this way next time: whats the worst that can happen if you try? You get rejected. Maybe if shes a bitch other people will find out and talk about you.
Whats the worst that can happen if you dont try?
You die alone.
You're probably right.But not as pretty as she was.
Check ur PM.I have to admit I had to google Leighton Meester.
You f'd up OP.
Sounds good, but I'm on break for a couple weeks now. I could just go up there afterwards and ask her about some random patient shes in charge of and ask her out then. But there are equally cute single nurses in the ICU, so I'll have more chances.Here's an idea:
Your rotation is over.
Go back to the floor where you were working, find her, say it was a pleasure working with her, and ask her if she would like dinner.
The bonus here is that if she says no, then you don't continue running into her, since your rotation is over.
So it wasn't about her at all.Sounds good, but I'm on break for a couple weeks now. I could just go up there afterwards and ask her about some random patient shes in charge of and ask her out then. But there are equally cute single nurses in the ICU, so I'll have more chances.
I’ve learned to not get too hung up on one person.
How?..I didn't sift through the entire thread so I don't know if this has been said, but this is a HIPAA violation.
And thus, be cautious.
How?..
I didn't sift through the entire thread so I don't know if this has been said, but this is a "mild harassment" violation according to the lessons I had in the hospital.
And thus, be cautious.
EDIT: Meant "mild harassment" by technical standards.
OP should just be cautious, that's all. If he goes about this the wrong way, things may just get a lot worse.
Having HR involved would definitely be a romance killer.
My apologies! I meant to say its technically considered a "mild harassment" policy, from what I had to learn at the hospital I work with.
I'm not saying the OP can't be a man and ask her out, but I am saying "be cautious".
The last thing you want is HR involved. Yuck!
Asking someone out on a date is never harassment. Ever. No HR would ever get involved with that.
It may be one of those interactions that HR would never actually care about, but I'm not kidding when I was specifically quizzed over harassment policies from HR and they said asking to date someone who works at your site could be considered harassment.
It might be a policy violation, but asking someone out in a friendly, normal way once is not harassment. Sexual harassment is defined as unwanted sexual advances or unwanted comments about the person’s sex or comments of a sexual nature. Unless you ask people out in a super creepy way, asking someone out on a date once does not qualify as harassment and cannot get you into trouble (again, unless it is against policy to date coworkers).
During the training on "sexual harassment", they say if the subject is offended by you asking them on a date, it can be taken up to HR.
They are either trying to scare you, or they are just misinformed. If they are saying that you can get in trouble because policy prevents dating in the workplace, that’s different. If you get terminated for asking out a coworker in a normal, casual manner, have fun with your wrongful termination suit.
Just make sure you stop if she says no. Repeated advances, even if they are just requests for a date, can be harassment.
Yea, what you're saying makes sense to me. I'm just reiterating what was told to me by HR.
I agree.Why is this thread still alive
How?Why does every thread here about relationships eventually devolve into some sketchy 4chan/Reddit/Misc dynamic?
Agreed that a hot girl has plenty of options to date.... but marriage is a whole different game. I'm a decent looking dude and have dated some hot girls. But I'm married to one that's a couple points below some of those hot ones, but is cute and sweet. There's a direct relationship between hot and crazy. There's such a thing as unicorn.
It is. Men who are appealing have endless options and they sleep around a lot. Girls don't like that and hence have to taper out their options and settle for someone who can be monogamous.
And to the OP, just strike up a little convo with that nurse and conclude the convo with asking her out for a drink or something casually. If she agrees, you win.
"The average dude" is probably above average to start off. Guys are horrible at judging other men's looks and always underestimate (always). Guys who look to be on the unattractive side actually make up what the average man looks like (by definition).Probably looks like this:
Bro, I’ve got so many anecdotes that say this is completely false. When it comes to actual serious relationships there are lots of factors that can actually give the “average dude” a good chance at attractive women. You are making sweeping generalizations.