Advice on dating a nurse?

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She sounds like she may be interested in you, and is waiting for you to bust a move.

Find something you both may be interested in, or something that may interest her at least and ask her to come along. It's a lot easier than you think, you got this. IF anything goes wrong, you only have one week on the floor and you'll never see her again so that's a good thing.

You could also add her on Facebook, grab her #, or something to keep in touch.
 
TheIllusionist said:
more like 8.5 . But any boost for men is welcome. options go up exponentially after lag phase up to say 7 or 7.5

Also a lot of dating is based on friend family referral, especially more serious stuff. Seen doctors recommended way more often and more strongly. It's just an easier sell.
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lol what do you even mean? (bolded)

And sure but referrals to who? Girls who can't find a guy on their own? That only happens if they're unattractive or carry red flags. Any half decent girl can have a few dozen options within one hour on tinder. These will include plenty of educated men + men with lots of money + very good looking guys. You don't think she'll be picky? Now imagine how picky a very attractive girl is if she also has a decent personality/job. And the first thing she's picky about is the man's looks.
 
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MedicineZ0Z said:
lol what do you even mean? (bolded)

And sure but referrals to who? Girls who can't find a guy on their own? That only happens if they're unattractive or carry red flags. Any half decent girl can have a few dozen options within one hour on tinder. These will include plenty of educated men + men with lots of money + very good looking guys. You don't think she'll be picky? Now imagine how picky a very attractive girl is if she also has a decent personality/job. And the first thing she's picky about is the man's looks.
Click to expand...
I think your reasoning is off. I've seen way too many drop dead gorgeous women married to below average looking guys. And the guys arent rich. Even in my class, the best looking dudes are dating down if you just consider looks. Looks only get you a look, and to be honest as long as your average looking youll be fine, its more your personality/sociability. take me for example. i have basically no friends (my social life is literally talking to the residents im on service with), a good number of the girls in my class think im weird, i have minimal social skills, and have been told i look and act like a sociopath by my classmates, yet have been hit on by 4 girls and 1 guy in the past 2 years inside the hospital im at. it means im at least somewhat attractive if i get hit on in the workplace, yet those interactions went no where because im ******ed, and i have no idea how to talk to women even when theyre interested. looks alone dont work. Even on tinder thats how it is- you can be attractive but if you have bad photos or give off a bad vibe you wont match- I saw this happen to a really good looking guy i know. my ex girlfriend of one week (literally) was very attractive, but she was possibly even weirder than me, which is why we worked out. but i dumped her because im ******ed, never even had sex with her, and then when i tried to get her back she rejected me. forget dating a hot girl, even the ugliest girl probably wont date me until i fix my social skills which i have no idea how im going to do. i can keep it together in a professional environment so ill get into my specialty, and im one of the richest people in my class, yet im in this predicament.

As for the nurse, i think she thinks im taken or not interested, because shes no longer looking at me. i think i might ask the female resident im on service with to help me out with her.
 
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thatawkguy said:
I think your reasoning is off. I've seen way too many drop dead gorgeous women married to below average looking guys. And the guys arent rich. Even in my class, the best looking dudes are dating down if you just consider looks. Looks only get you a look, and to be honest as long as your average looking youll be fine, its more your personality/sociability. take me for example. i have basically no friends (my social life is literally talking to the residents im on service with), a good number of the girls in my class think im weird, i have minimal social skills, and have been told i look and act like a sociopath by my classmates, yet have been hit on by 4 girls and 1 guy in the past 2 years inside the hospital im at. it means im at least somewhat attractive if i get hit on in the workplace, yet those interactions went no where because im ******ed, and i have no idea how to talk to women even when theyre interested. looks alone dont work. Even on tinder thats how it is- you can be attractive but if you have bad photos or give off a bad vibe you wont match- I saw this happen to a really good looking guy i know. my ex girlfriend of one week (literally) was very attractive, but she was possibly even weirder than me, which is why we worked out. but i dumped her because im ******ed, never even had sex with her, and then when i tried to get her back she rejected me. forget dating a hot girl, even the ugliest girl probably wont date me until i fix my social skills which i have no idea how im going to do. i can keep it together in a professional environment so ill get into my specialty, and im one of the richest people in my class, yet im in this predicament.

As for the nurse, i think she thinks im taken or not interested, because shes no longer looking at me. i think i might ask the female resident im on service with to help me out with her.
Click to expand...

You're getting a couple things wrong. A lot of men look very masculine (even without any facial hair) which makes them look unappealing to males but very appealing to females.
You're right that social skills are very important and that you fail without them. But if you aren't above average in looks or masculine looking, you have virtually zero chance with an attractive girl unless she has issues (ex. insecurity, common). You see mismatched couples but don't realize that the woman is carrying serious baggage along with other major issues.
 
MedicineZ0Z said:
You're getting a couple things wrong. A lot of men look very masculine (even without any facial hair) which makes them look unappealing to males but very appealing to females.
You're right that social skills are very important and that you fail without them. But if you aren't above average in looks or masculine looking, you have virtually zero chance with an attractive girl unless she has issues (ex. insecurity, common). You see mismatched couples but don't realize that the woman is carrying serious baggage along with other major issues.
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So youre saying that every attractive girl whos with an average or below average guy has baggage/issues? I dont buy that.
 
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thatawkguy said:
As for the nurse, i think she thinks im taken or not interested, because shes no longer looking at me. i think i might ask the female resident im on service with to help me out with her.
Click to expand...

Bro, seriously? Have you not taken anything away from the 100+ posts on this thread? Do not ask some resident to help you out. Just ask the nurse out already.
 
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MedicineZ0Z said:
You're getting a couple things wrong. A lot of men look very masculine (even without any facial hair) which makes them look unappealing to males but very appealing to females.
You're right that social skills are very important and that you fail without them. But if you aren't above average in looks or masculine looking, you have virtually zero chance with an attractive girl unless she has issues (ex. insecurity, common). You see mismatched couples but don't realize that the woman is carrying serious baggage along with other major issues.
Click to expand...

Why are you so invested into this theory to make such sweeping generalizations? You have met a very tiny fraction of humanity after all.
 
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thatawkguy said:
So youre saying that every attractive girl whos with an average or below average guy has baggage/issues? I dont buy that.
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I'm saying that attractive girls with those guys are very infrequent (and yes those ones do usually have issues). You probably just pick them out sharply then remember them while ignoring the fact that almost every attractive girl you see is with an equally attractive guy.
It's also common sense. Why would she pick an average guy when she has several options that are much better in every way?
 
thatawkguy said:
I think your reasoning is off. I've seen way too many drop dead gorgeous women married to below average looking guys. And the guys arent rich. Even in my class, the best looking dudes are dating down if you just consider looks. Looks only get you a look, and to be honest as long as your average looking youll be fine, its more your personality/sociability. take me for example. i have basically no friends (my social life is literally talking to the residents im on service with), a good number of the girls in my class think im weird, i have minimal social skills, and have been told i look and act like a sociopath by my classmates, yet have been hit on by 4 girls and 1 guy in the past 2 years inside the hospital im at. it means im at least somewhat attractive if i get hit on in the workplace, yet those interactions went no where because im ******ed, and i have no idea how to talk to women even when theyre interested. looks alone dont work. Even on tinder thats how it is- you can be attractive but if you have bad photos or give off a bad vibe you wont match- I saw this happen to a really good looking guy i know. my ex girlfriend of one week (literally) was very attractive, but she was possibly even weirder than me, which is why we worked out. but i dumped her because im ******ed, never even had sex with her, and then when i tried to get her back she rejected me. forget dating a hot girl, even the ugliest girl probably wont date me until i fix my social skills which i have no idea how im going to do. i can keep it together in a professional environment so ill get into my specialty, and im one of the richest people in my class, yet im in this predicament.

As for the nurse, i think she thinks im taken or not interested, because shes no longer looking at me. i think i might ask the female resident im on service with to help me out with her.
Click to expand...

Not in my experience at all. I've seen plenty of hot decent girls introduced to people. Social connections ate huge. Hot girls don't just trust anyone even themselves at times, especially after rough break ups or divorces. And all this is all relative. I'm saying money gives a boost. You're trying to turn it into something extreme. Also, some of the most beautiful women I've had the opportunity to date have been introduced to me via mutual friends. It's ramped after med school for sure.

Basically lag phase is 80 20 rule. 20% of the guys take 80% of the attention. So a marginal gain in looks has much bigger reward at some levels rather than others. I for example have a good face, but I was like a 6 let's say. I worked out a whole lot and added 40lbs to my frame in 4 years. I've definitely seen a rapid rise in attention, going from a 6 to say a 7.5 than when I went to a 4 to a 6 (completed puberty late because was a late bloomer so looked like a 4 at beginning of college and I worked on my game the most then too).

I simplified the above to a gain in looks because that is mostly what it was in my situation. Overall, attraction is based on sexual market place value. The same level of gains can have much bigger impact at different transition states; for example, going from a 1 to a 3 is not going be nearly as big as going from a 6 to an 8. Sexual market place value depends on stuff like looks, money power, and social connections. It can also be faked well with confidence or charm aka what is conventionally known as (sometimes in weird spaces that I don't support in many ways, spaces like the manosphere) as game.
 
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MedicineZ0Z said:
lol what do you even mean? (bolded)

And sure but referrals to who? Girls who can't find a guy on their own? That only happens if they're unattractive or carry red flags. Any half decent girl can have a few dozen options within one hour on tinder. These will include plenty of educated men + men with lots of money + very good looking guys. You don't think she'll be picky? Now imagine how picky a very attractive girl is if she also has a decent personality/job. And the first thing she's picky about is the man's looks.
Click to expand...

Agreed that a hot girl has plenty of options to date.... but marriage is a whole different game. I'm a decent looking dude and have dated some hot girls. But I'm married to one that's a couple points below some of those hot ones, but is cute and sweet. There's a direct relationship between hot and crazy. There's such a thing as unicorn.

And to the OP, just strike up a little convo with that nurse and conclude the convo with asking her out for a drink or something casually. If she agrees, you win.
 
arcus said:
He fits the profile of a crystal meth dealer ....just saying
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Probably looks like this:

D410C7DF-2ED5-4B7D-983D-02A334E6CBB5.jpeg


MedicineZ0Z said:
But if you aren't above average in looks or masculine looking, you have virtually zero chance with an attractive girl unless she has issues
Click to expand...

Bro, I’ve got so many anecdotes that say this is completely false. When it comes to actual serious relationships there are lots of factors that can actually give the “average dude” a good chance at attractive women. You are making sweeping generalizations.
 
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DokterMom said:
This is something all decent men need to truly hear and understand.
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and women as well

“I think the American public has heard so much about the sexual activities and the sex lives of these individuals, and we’ve sort of become cynical and sort of said, ‘Well, if he did it, maybe that’s OK; they all do it.’” - Anita Hill, USA Today

Anita Hill is not Hollywood’s answer to Harvey Weinstein. 'They all do it' defense of Clinton doesn't fly.
​

AnatomyGrey12 said:
When it comes to actual serious relationships there are lots of factors that can actually give the “average dude” a good chance at attractive women.
Click to expand...

There is so much more to a successful LTR other than looks. Yes looks initiate the transaction but what comes out of the mouth and eventually their heart, assuming they have one, allows the young relationship to proceed.

If anything Tindr and the many other hookup apps have proven that looks dont lead to a successful LTR.

OP you might consider that the Nurse you are eyeing might find you attractive for reasons other than looks.
 
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arcus said:
and women as well

“I think the American public has heard so much about the sexual activities and the sex lives of these individuals, and we’ve sort of become cynical and sort of said, ‘Well, if he did it, maybe that’s OK; they all do it.’” - Anita Hill, USA Today

Anita Hill is not Hollywood’s answer to Harvey Weinstein. 'They all do it' defense of Clinton doesn't fly.
​



There is so much more to a successful LTR other than looks. Yes looks initiate the transaction but what comes out of the mouth and eventually their heart, assuming they have one, allows the young relationship to proceed.

If anything Tindr and the many other hookup apps have proven that looks dont lead to a successful LTR.

OP you might consider that the Nurse you are eyeing might find you attractive for reasons other than looks.
Click to expand...

Well shes not eyeing me anymore. And she was always busy/running around when I wasnt with my team (shes new), so I never really got a chance to talk to her. Its really unfortunate that I have to meet women this way, because Im in a small city without a very good night life, and tinder just doesnt work for me. I will update you guys if I find another cute nurse, since my hospital is full of them. Btw, on an unrelated note the patient care associates are pretty cool. I was thirsty for cranberry juice so I asked him for one and he came back with cranberry juice and ginger ale.
 
thatawkguy said:
Well like I said shes not eyeing me anymore. And she was always busy/running around when I wasnt with my team (shes new), so I never really got a chance to talk to her. I dont think flirting with a nurse would have looked good in front of the attending or residents. I will update you guys if I find another cute nurse, since my hospital is full of them. Btw, on an unrelated note the patient care associates are pretty cool. I was thirsty for cranberry juice so I asked him for one and he came back with cranberry juice and ginger ale.
Click to expand...

Cmon man
 
thatawkguy said:
Well shes not eyeing me anymore. And she was always busy/running around when I wasnt with my team (shes new), so I never really got a chance to talk to her. Its really unfortunate that I have to meet women this way, because Im in a small city without a very good night life, and tinder just doesnt work for me. I will update you guys if I find another cute nurse, since my hospital is full of them. Btw, on an unrelated note the patient care associates are pretty cool. I was thirsty for cranberry juice so I asked him for one and he came back with cranberry juice and ginger ale.
Click to expand...

So you have given up on women and now you switched to men?
Why didnt you ask the Nurse for Cranberry Juice, Ginger Ale or KY Jelly?

Make sure to use Truvada
 
arcus said:
So you have given up on women and now you switched to men?
Why didnt you ask the Nurse for Cranberry Juice, Ginger Ale or KY Jelly?

Make sure to use Truvada
Click to expand...
Because she was working and he was just chilling at the nurses station. He was so good about it though. Got me a cup filled with ice too, and then saluted me after I thanked him. Hes got a career in the service industry for sure. I did another cam show today for kicks, and I've realized I could probably make decent pocket money doing this.
 
thatawkguy said:
Because she was working and he was just chilling at the nurses station. He was so good about it though. Got me a cup filled with ice too, and then saluted me after I thanked him. Hes got a career in the service industry for sure. I did another cam show today for kicks, and I've realized I could probably make decent pocket money doing this.
Click to expand...

Wtf bro!
 
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thatawkguy said:
Because she was working and he was just chilling at the nurses station. He was so good about it though. Got me a cup filled with ice too, and then saluted me after I thanked him. Hes got a career in the service industry for sure. I did another cam show today for kicks, and I've realized I could probably make decent pocket money doing this.
Click to expand...

What's going on here? Stop derailing your own thread!
 
A nurse called me down to the ED when I was a resident to see a patient. That was the first time I met her. We are married 33 years. Things happen like that. Of course back then there was no internet, no online dating, and no cell phones. OP has so many options, I am not sure why he is stressing about this. If OP is afraid of rejection, then forget about it. Dating is about putting yourself out there.
 
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boogaaloo said:
What's going on here? Stop derailing your own thread!
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Well today was my last day on the rotation and unfortunately it was super busy, but I finally talked to her after I asked her a question about a patient, and she was nice and smiled and showed me the info in the chart. Later I was working at the nurses station and she was working at a mobile station, and I guess she made a mistake because she cursed pretty loudly, and I just look at her and laugh, and she starts blushing hard and laughs. I got called away by my resident on consults and her shift ended, but it wasnt a complete loss. If I had a couple more days I think I would have asked her out. You have to realize I'm socially autistic, and shes really hot (she looks like leighton meester), so this was progress and talking to hot nurses in the future wont be hard anymore.
 
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thatawkguy said:
Well today was my last day on the rotation and unfortunately it was super busy, but I finally talked to her after I asked her a question about a patient, and she was nice and smiled and showed me the info in the chart. Later I was working at the nurses station and she was working at a mobile station, and I guess she made a mistake because she cursed pretty loudly, and I just look at her and laugh, and she starts blushing hard and laughs. I got called away by my resident on consults and her shift ended, but it wasnt a complete loss. If I had a couple more days I think I would have asked her out. You have to realize I'm socially autistic, and shes really hot (she looks like leighton meester), so this was progress and talking to hot nurses in the future wont be hard anymore.
Click to expand...
So all I read here is that you let an opportunity slip through your fingers... it’s all right, there will be other pretty women to cross your path.
 
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thatawkguy said:
Well today was my last day on the rotation and unfortunately it was super busy, but I finally talked to her after I asked her a question about a patient, and she was nice and smiled and showed me the info in the chart. Later I was working at the nurses station and she was working at a mobile station, and I guess she made a mistake because she cursed pretty loudly, and I just look at her and laugh, and she starts blushing hard and laughs. I got called away by my resident on consults and her shift ended, but it wasnt a complete loss. If I had a couple more days I think I would have asked her out. You have to realize I'm socially autistic, and shes really hot (she looks like leighton meester), so this was progress and talking to hot nurses in the future wont be hard anymore.
Click to expand...

Sigh
 
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thatawkguy said:
Well today was my last day on the rotation and unfortunately it was super busy, but I finally talked to her after I asked her a question about a patient, and she was nice and smiled and showed me the info in the chart. Later I was working at the nurses station and she was working at a mobile station, and I guess she made a mistake because she cursed pretty loudly, and I just look at her and laugh, and she starts blushing hard and laughs. I got called away by my resident on consults and her shift ended, but it wasnt a complete loss. If I had a couple more days I think I would have asked her out. You have to realize I'm socially autistic, and shes really hot (she looks like leighton meester), so this was progress and talking to hot nurses in the future wont be hard anymore.
Click to expand...
Try thinking about it this way next time: whats the worst that can happen if you try? You get rejected. Maybe if shes a bitch other people will find out and talk about you.
Whats the worst that can happen if you dont try?
You die alone.
 
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Newyawk said:
Try thinking about it this way next time: whats the worst that can happen if you try? You get rejected. Maybe if shes a bitch other people will find out and talk about you.
Whats the worst that can happen if you dont try?
You die alone.
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It sounds logical but from my perspective its foreign to me, and I realize I'll have to eventually do that.

PashaOdesit said:
But not as pretty as she was.
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You're probably right.

VincentAdultman said:
I have to admit I had to google Leighton Meester.

You f'd up OP.
Click to expand...
Check ur PM.
 
Here's an idea:

Your rotation is over.

Go back to the floor where you were working, find her, say it was a pleasure working with her, and ask her if she would like dinner.

The bonus here is that if she says no, then you don't continue running into her, since your rotation is over.
 
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aProgDirector said:
Here's an idea:

Your rotation is over.

Go back to the floor where you were working, find her, say it was a pleasure working with her, and ask her if she would like dinner.

The bonus here is that if she says no, then you don't continue running into her, since your rotation is over.
Click to expand...
Sounds good, but I'm on break for a couple weeks now. I could just go up there afterwards and ask her about some random patient shes in charge of and ask her out then. But there are equally cute single nurses in the ICU, so I'll have more chances.
 
thatawkguy said:
Sounds good, but I'm on break for a couple weeks now. I could just go up there afterwards and ask her about some random patient shes in charge of and ask her out then. But there are equally cute single nurses in the ICU, so I'll have more chances.
Click to expand...
So it wasn't about her at all.

Sent from my [device_name] using SDN mobile
 
I didn't sift through the entire thread so I don't know if this has been said, but this is a "mild harassment" violation according to the lessons I had in the hospital.

And thus, be cautious.

EDIT: Meant "mild harassment" by technical standards.

OP should just be cautious, that's all. If he goes about this the wrong way, things may just get a lot worse.

Having HR involved would definitely be a romance killer.
 
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Newyawk said:
How?..
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My apologies! I meant to say its technically considered a "mild harassment" policy, from what I had to learn at the hospital I work with.

I'm not saying the OP can't be a man and ask her out, but I am saying "be cautious".

The last thing you want is HR involved. Yuck!
 
Guys, stop worrying about a woman liking you. Just have some values, try to stand for them, do what you think is the right thing, and if women don’t like you, you weren’t what they wanted or what they think they deserve but that doesn’t make you a worthless person. Keep life simple. It makes it less miserable.
 
Why is this thread still alive
 
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Robin-jay said:
I didn't sift through the entire thread so I don't know if this has been said, but this is a "mild harassment" violation according to the lessons I had in the hospital.

And thus, be cautious.

EDIT: Meant "mild harassment" by technical standards.

OP should just be cautious, that's all. If he goes about this the wrong way, things may just get a lot worse.

Having HR involved would definitely be a romance killer.
Click to expand...

Robin-jay said:
My apologies! I meant to say its technically considered a "mild harassment" policy, from what I had to learn at the hospital I work with.

I'm not saying the OP can't be a man and ask her out, but I am saying "be cautious".

The last thing you want is HR involved. Yuck!
Click to expand...

Asking someone out on a date is never harassment. Ever. No HR would ever get involved with that.
 
AnatomyGrey12 said:
Asking someone out on a date is never harassment. Ever. No HR would ever get involved with that.
Click to expand...

It may be one of those interactions that HR would never actually care about, but I'm not kidding when I was specifically quizzed over harassment policies from HR and they said asking to date someone who works at your site could be considered harassment.
 
Robin-jay said:
It may be one of those interactions that HR would never actually care about, but I'm not kidding when I was specifically quizzed over harassment policies from HR and they said asking to date someone who works at your site could be considered harassment.
Click to expand...

It might be a policy violation, but asking someone out in a friendly, normal way once is not harassment. Sexual harassment is defined as unwanted sexual advances or unwanted comments about the person’s sex or comments of a sexual nature. Unless you ask people out in a super creepy way, asking someone out on a date once does not qualify as harassment and cannot get you into trouble (again, unless it is against policy to date coworkers).
 
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Matthew9Thirtyfive said:
It might be a policy violation, but asking someone out in a friendly, normal way once is not harassment. Sexual harassment is defined as unwanted sexual advances or unwanted comments about the person’s sex or comments of a sexual nature. Unless you ask people out in a super creepy way, asking someone out on a date once does not qualify as harassment and cannot get you into trouble (again, unless it is against policy to date coworkers).
Click to expand...

During the training on "sexual harassment", they say if the subject is offended by you asking them on a date, they can take up to HR, and HR can decide.
 
Robin-jay said:
During the training on "sexual harassment", they say if the subject is offended by you asking them on a date, it can be taken up to HR.
Click to expand...

They are either trying to scare you, or they are just misinformed. If they are saying that you can get in trouble because policy prevents dating in the workplace, that’s different. If you get terminated for asking out a coworker in a normal, casual manner, have fun with your wrongful termination suit.

Just make sure you stop if she says no. Repeated advances, even if they are just requests for a date, can be harassment.
 
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Matthew9Thirtyfive said:
They are either trying to scare you, or they are just misinformed. If they are saying that you can get in trouble because policy prevents dating in the workplace, that’s different. If you get terminated for asking out a coworker in a normal, casual manner, have fun with your wrongful termination suit.

Just make sure you stop if she says no. Repeated advances, even if they are just requests for a date, can be harassment.
Click to expand...

Yea, what you're saying makes sense to me. I'm just reiterating what was told to me by HR.
 
brocephalic said:
Agreed that a hot girl has plenty of options to date.... but marriage is a whole different game. I'm a decent looking dude and have dated some hot girls. But I'm married to one that's a couple points below some of those hot ones, but is cute and sweet. There's a direct relationship between hot and crazy. There's such a thing as unicorn.
It is. Men who are appealing have endless options and they sleep around a lot. Girls don't like that and hence have to taper out their options and settle for someone who can be monogamous.
And to the OP, just strike up a little convo with that nurse and conclude the convo with asking her out for a drink or something casually. If she agrees, you win.
Click to expand...


AnatomyGrey12 said:
Probably looks like this:




Bro, I’ve got so many anecdotes that say this is completely false. When it comes to actual serious relationships there are lots of factors that can actually give the “average dude” a good chance at attractive women. You are making sweeping generalizations.
Click to expand...
"The average dude" is probably above average to start off. Guys are horrible at judging other men's looks and always underestimate (always). Guys who look to be on the unattractive side actually make up what the average man looks like (by definition).
Men also overestimate women's looks when it fits their narrative. Semi-cute girl with lots of makeup? Suddenly she's an 8-9 and the decent looking guy with her is 5/10 flat average. If you actually knew sorority girls in undergrad, go to parties/clubs or even scroll through instagram - you'll realize a true mismatch in looks is quite uncommon.

Now I do agree other factors play a big role in a real relationship. But it can swing to the other side as well. Just like some men like to sleep around with any girl, plenty of women do as well. This means lots of average-ish looking guys get shots at hook ups but aren't appealing for actual dating/showing off to friends & family. Girls don't want to bring home a 5'6 plain average guy when they can easily bring home the 6'3 jock.
 
Aren’t girls looking at the complete package (secure job, earning ability, lack of bad habits like sleeping around, boozing, drugs, brushes with the law and then looks) when picking a mate. That is unlike men who are looking superficially at looks alone. I see plenty of good looking women married to modest looking but financially and mentallly stable guys.
 
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