How do you keep your marriage/LTR going well while in pharmacy school?

[aboveliquidice]

Back when I hung around people who cared about religion, I heard a rather profound statement.

"A woman will follow a man anywhere... Assuming that man knows where he is going."

In modern times, I'm not sure how completely true this statement is. Part of any healthy relationship is the buy in. If you don't buy in, meaning to sacrifice time or effort or whatever, there is little incentive to stay when things get difficult.

The successful marriages I see amongst my peers are those that have a classical (read old school) perspective of marriage. The guy is the bread winner and head of the home, the women work part time and raise kids. Almost all of them are made up of MDs, DMD, PharmDs, ODs, etc. for BOTH parents.

The ladies are all hard working / successful... they just want to be mom's too. I am pretty sure that last statement is changing too.

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[rxlea]

For what its worth, look up Northampton, Massachusetts. Claim to fame is that is the most LGTB friendly town in the whole US of A. I went to school in Amherst, an adjacent town, and I can attest to it ( I like me some fine woman tho)

Rachel Maddow lives there as well.

Thanks for the support. I heard the same about Northampton. It might be an option after pharmacy school if my gf gets into Harvard Med. She definitely stands a chance at that so we will see where life takes us.

 

[PharmDstudent]

When it comes to moving a relationship, family, etc., women should make the decision. Why? Because womens' lives typically revolve around social networks, i.e. they require a solid network to thrive.

 

[Tinkerbell22]

Am I a bad person if I find the relationship woes of others amusing?

I mean, some people get annoyed when people complain about not being able to find a pharmacy job in an area. 3.5 billion members of the opposite (or same) sex and you can't find someone? It's not even affected by the recession, ya bums.

I could find myself another 20 wives in the next week easier than I could find a job in the NYC-DC corridor right now.

Not a bad person. lol

See...all the talk about not wanting to go to school "in a place like" WV. You could be going to school in a surprisingly progressive college town and have marriage rights. Ha.

That is how I feel about Georgia. Funny how gay couples can't even adopt in Florida, but they are able to do it across state lines in one of the most conservative states in the union.

lol @ marriage

I'm with you on that one... and no I haven't been single in 3-4 years. lol

For what its worth, look up Northampton, Massachusetts. Claim to fame is that is the most LGTB friendly town in the whole US of A. I went to school in Amherst, an adjacent town, and I can attest to it ( I like me some fine woman tho)

Rachel Maddow lives there as well.

ehhh i dunno...

this is my hometown's trash dump...

 

[rxlea]

I was never a big fan of the rainbow thing except when I was in high school...but then again, we tend to be on the more conservative side of the spectrum.

 

[DrPepsi]

When it comes to moving a relationship, family, etc., women should make the decision. Why? Because womens' lives typically revolve around social networks, i.e. they require a solid network to thrive.

So you would sacrifice a better business deal and a better location for a "social network"? LOL

That's grounds for divorce right there. In no way would I let my wife be in charge of the decision, either we come to a consensus or we compromise. That's how a relationship works, it's not a one way street.

 

[PharmaTope]

Back when I hung around people who cared about religion, I heard a rather profound statement.

"A woman will follow a man anywhere... Assuming that man knows where he is going."

In modern times, I'm not sure how completely true this statement is. Part of any healthy relationship is the buy in. If you don't buy in, meaning to sacrifice time or effort or whatever, there is little incentive to stay when things get difficult.

The successful marriages I see amongst my peers are those that have a classical (read old school) perspective of marriage. The guy is the bread winner and head of the home, the women work part time and raise kids. Almost all of them are made up of MDs, DMD, PharmDs, ODs, etc. for BOTH parents.

The ladies are all hard working / successful... they just want to be mom's too. I am pretty sure that last statement is changing too.

what if the women are the big bread winners and the guy takes care of the kids?

 

[PharmDstudent]

what if the women are the big bread winners and the guy takes care of the kids?

house husband FTW!

 

[PharmDstudent]

So you would sacrifice a better business deal and a better location for a "social network"? LOL

That's grounds for divorce right there. In no way would I let my wife be in charge of the decision, either we come to a consensus or we compromise. That's how a relationship works, it's not a one way street.

A better business deal is useless if all your wife has to do, in this wonderful new frontier you've picked out for her , is to spend money. Purses and shoes anyone?
A better location for who?

Compromising is important. However, if she doesn't have a decent social network, then just wait and see what'll happen...

 

[rxlea]

Yeah wait and see how long it takes before she's asking for a "refill too soon" on her Xanax. Heh.

 

[PharmDstudent]

Yeah wait and see how long it takes before she's asking for a "refill too soon" on her Xanax. Heh.

It's funny that you bring up anxiety. I didn't even think of that...

I can relate to being depressed.

I lived in a couple of big cities during pharmacy school where my boyfriend and I met wonderful people and had a lot of good times. However, when it was all said and done, I missed my good friends and family, especially my 2 year old nephew... to the point of it being depressing.
So, when I moved back home to work, I started hanging out and doing things with them on my time off that I would've never been able to do while living far away. My best friend and I went out to dinner, I've played with my nephew a few times, I've gotten close to my mom again, and I've had a couple of stellar girls night out.

Sure, nothing beats watching the Saints parade and hanging out my wonderful neighbors during Jazz Fest and Mardi Gras, but gahlee... I missed my old friends and family! I missed our connection.

 

[DrPepsi]

A better business deal is useless if all your wife has to do, in this wonderful new frontier you've picked out for her , is to spend money. Purses and shoes anyone?
A better location for who?

Compromising is important. However, if she doesn't have a decent social network, then just wait and see what'll happen...

You're not married and you aren't even 30 I presume, what do you know about social networks and being with a significant other?

You are exactly the type of woman I avoided like the plague when I dated. It's all me me me and not us us us. You want us to bow at your feet and do whatever you tell us to do. Sorry bud, it doesn't work like that and especially not with men like me. Just because you found a man that is silly enough to let you drag him around with you doesn't mean you're a marriage or relationship expert. It almost makes you a slave owner.

 

[PharmDstudent]

You're not married and you aren't even 30 I presume, what do you know about social networks and being with a significant other?

You are exactly the type of woman I avoided like the plague when I dated. It's all me me me and not us us us. You want us to bow at your feet and do whatever you tell us to do. Sorry bud, it doesn't work like that and especially not with men like me. Just because you found a man that is silly enough to let you drag him around with you doesn't mean you're a marriage or relationship expert. It almost makes you a slave owner.

He follows me... not the dollar, his boss, or the thousands of other skirts that he could be chasing.

If 6 years isn't long enough, then please, tell me how long I need to be in a relationship for it to be considered significant.

 

[DrPepsi]

He follows me... not the dollar, his boss, or the thousands of other skirts that he could be chasing.

If 6 years isn't long enough, then please, tell me how long I need to be in a relationship for it to be considered significant.

He's willing to follow you but not willing to marry you?


That's all you need.

 

[PharmDstudent]

He's willing to follow you but not willing to marry you?


That's all you need.

You obviously haven't been around here long enough... because if you had been around, you would know that I'm not interested in getting married.


After telling him about the thread, he just said: "I like being your love slave".

 

[aboveliquidice]

He's willing to follow you but not willing to marry you?


That's all you need.

The ladies that frequent here are a special group. They are all different, unique, but very cool. They definitely cross the spectrum of backgrounds and opinions though.

 

[DrPepsi]

You obviously haven't been around here long enough... because if you had been around, you would know that I'm not interested in getting married.


After telling him about the thread, he just said: "I like being your love slave".

You realize you don't need a boyfriend to get sex, right? It makes no sense to me why someone who has no interest in getting married would call anyone a boyfriend. Are you that lonely that you need companionship by dragging someone around like that?

 

[Momus]

It makes no sense to me why someone who has no interest in getting married would call anyone a boyfriend.

This post fails in so many different ways...

 

[DrPepsi]

This post fails in so many different ways...

How so? What's the point of not wanting that sense of commitment if you're gonna call someone a boyfriend? Call them what they are: booty calls.

Or call them a boyfriend if you're that lonely.

 

[SpirivaSunrise]

The ladies that frequent here are a special group. They are all different, unique, but very cool. They definitely cross the spectrum of backgrounds and opinions though.

LOL! You make us sounds like some real pieces of work!

 

[aboveliquidice]

You realize you don't need a boyfriend to get sex, right? It makes no sense to me why someone who has no interest in getting married would call anyone a boyfriend. Are you that lonely that you need companionship by dragging someone around like that?

Companionship - Check
Marriage - Expensive endeavor with few benefits for modern couples.

If you aren't going to have kids - getting married makes little sense nowadays.

 

[aboveliquidice]

LOL! You make us sounds like some real pieces of work!

Do I not speak the truth?

 

[DrPepsi]

Companionship - Check
Marriage - Expensive endeavor with few benefits for modern couples.

If you aren't going to have kids - getting married makes little sense nowadays.

I agree but why do you need a boyfriend? What's wrong with having a booty call?

 

[aboveliquidice]

I agree but why do you need a boyfriend? What's wrong with having a booty call?

I don't think my soon-to-be-wife would appreciate a booty call on the side.

Honestly, there is no real benefit to being married (aside from kids). It is a financial liability. People that would have been married 20 years ago are now content to simply live with / love someone without the certificate.

It's a brave new world.

 

[DrPepsi]

I don't think my soon-to-be-wife would appreciate a booty call on the side.

Honestly, there is no real benefit to being married (aside from kids). It is a financial liability. People that would have been married 20 years ago are now content to simply live with / love someone without the certificate.

It's a brave new world.

How is that relevant? PharmDstudent doesn't want to get married, you do. My statement can't be applied to you if you want to get married.

edit: Or wait, now it reads as if you don't want to get married. Your response to me is completely confusing.

 

[aboveliquidice]

How is that relevant? PharmDstudent doesn't want to get married, you do. My statement can't be applied to you if you want to get married.

edit: Or wait, now it reads as if you don't want to get married. Your response to me is completely confusing.

You quoted me and asked about my boyfriend... I was correcting your confusion. Read your post above again.

I am explaining how the concept of marriage is a bit outdated. I happen to believe in it, but I can certainly understand why people would choose not to do it.

 

[DrPepsi]

You quoted me and asked about my boyfriend... I was correcting your confusion. Read your post above again.

I am explaining how the concept of marriage is a bit outdated. I happen to believe in it, but I can certainly understand why people would choose not to do it.

Oh, well I was continuing the conversation that was going on.

So if you don't believe in it then why do you need a boyfriend unless you're completely lonely?

 

[PharmDstudent]

Oh, well I was continuing the conversation that was going on.

So if you don't believe in it then why do you need a boyfriend unless you're completely lonely?

Because we're best friends who love each other. There have been significant bumps in the road (here and there), but beyond that, we're here for each other- not necessarily an institution.

 

[FarscapeGirl]

I don't think my soon-to-be-wife would appreciate a booty call on the side.

Honestly, there is no real benefit to being married (aside from kids). It is a financial liability. People that would have been married 20 years ago are now content to simply live with / love someone without the certificate.

It's a brave new world.

I don't know; I think there are a few benefits to getting married. Socially, in many parts of the US, people respond to you differently if you say you're married. Think about someone picking up a prescription for their husband or wife vs. their boyfriend or girlfriend. I imagine you get a different picture in your head?

The whole celebration sets up a distancing from your previous family and a beginning to your new one. I didn't think this would be the case, but two years after I've been married, I can see the changes. My mom, who's much more conservative than my dad, really changed in how she related to me, too.

And there can be financial benefits. Being married is paying for my health insurance. However, there certainly can be detriments; I also get much less in student loans because my husband is employed and not a student, even though he makes not much more than he did as a student (and all that extra goes to paying off his student loans!).

 

[FarscapeGirl]

I made a deal with my SO. She follows me to pharmacy school and then I follow her to medical school. Hopefully she gets into medical school somewhere that I can get a job and/or residency.

There's a good chance that you should be able to find something. Pharmacy's nice like that. Right now, my husband found a post-doc in Seattle and will hopefully find another one here while I'm finishing pharmacy school. Then, his career will dictate where we go next, provided I can find some sort of job (although we are hoping to stay in the Pacific NW if we can).

I don't think I'd want him nor would he want me to do something totally out of sync with our career goals. He had talked about possibly doing industry instead of an academic post-doc while I was in school, but I know he'd be completely unhappy, and he might not be able to later get the career he'd want.

 

[Tinkerbell22]

You realize you don't need a boyfriend to get sex, right? It makes no sense to me why someone who has no interest in getting married would call anyone a boyfriend. Are you that lonely that you need companionship by dragging someone around like that?

Are you that dense? People have boyfriends because they might want the security and comfort level of a monogamous relationship, not booty calls with random a-- people. In my eyes that would give a girl a repuation and possible other issues that I personaly don't agree with or want to have. Plus having a boyfriend, especially one who lives with you is about much more than a physical relationship. Its practially the same thing as marriage except we will probably last longer. Lol. I'm not lonely at all, in fact I love being single and having all my friends around and being able to do anything I want, but having a relationship benefits me and I prefer to have one if I do find the right person... I just don't agree that we still need marriage now days, esp in this society, I really think marriage has potential to shorten a relationship rather than make it last in a healthy/happy state.

 

[DrPepsi]

Are you that dense? People have boyfriends because they might want the security and comfort level of a monogamous relationship, not booty calls with random a-- people. In my eyes that would give a girl a repuation and possible other issues that I personaly don't agree with or want to have. Plus having a boyfriend, especially one who lives with you is about much more than a physical relationship. Its practially the same thing as marriage except we will probably last longer. Lol. I'm not lonely at all, in fact I love being single and having all my friends around and being able to do anything I want, but having a relationship benefits me and I prefer to have one if I do find the right person... I just don't agree that we still need marriage now days, esp in this society, I really think marriage has potential to shorten a relationship rather than make it last in a healthy/happy state.

What? Are you that dense that you can't read my posts? Don't you have friends and family to give you comfort? Why do you need a man or a woman to give you that? If you really feel that marriage is a useless institution then you shouldn't be having a boyfriend. Reputation for what? Doing what every American does....sex? Please.

Whether or not you agree with me, your status is "pre-pharmacy". You're too immature for a relationship anyway (not in the sense of being childish but in the sense that you haven't even accomplished the goals you've set out to achieve). But that's just my opinion, if you haven't accomplished your goal in life then you are too immature for a serious relationship. Too many people let that false sense of "security" drive them away from what they want to do with their life and it's really sad to me. You're no more or less secure in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship than you are in a husband/wife relationship. You are not special.

edit: Marriage only shortens it when you think that being married means you have to act a different way to each other. The situation was right and we both had the same outlook on goals and dreams, that's why I got married. Plus it helps that I get tax benefits and hospital visitation rights compared to people that aren't married so more money in my pocket. But that's only a bonus to getting married, not a reason to get married.

 

[The Poet Sings]

What? Are you that dense that you can't read my posts? Don't you have friends and family to give you comfort? Why do you need a man or a woman to give you that? If you really feel that marriage is a useless institution then you shouldn't be having a boyfriend. Reputation for what? Doing what every American does....sex? Please.

Whether or not you agree with me, your status is "pre-pharmacy". You're too immature for a relationship anyway (not in the sense of being childish but in the sense that you haven't even accomplished the goals you've set out to achieve). But that's just my opinion, if you haven't accomplished your goal in life then you are too immature for a serious relationship. Too many people let that false sense of "security" drive them away from what they want to do with their life and it's really sad to me. You're no more or less secure in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship than you are in a husband/wife relationship. You are not special.

edit: Marriage only shortens it when you think that being married means you have to act a different way to each other. The situation was right and we both had the same outlook on goals and dreams, that's why I got married. Plus it helps that I get tax benefits and hospital visitation rights compared to people that aren't married so more money in my pocket. But that's only a bonus to getting married, not a reason to get married.

 

[rxlea]

What? Are you that dense that you can't read my posts? Don't you have friends and family to give you comfort? Why do you need a man or a woman to give you that? If you really feel that marriage is a useless institution then you shouldn't be having a boyfriend. Reputation for what? Doing what every American does....sex? Please.

Whether or not you agree with me, your status is "pre-pharmacy". You're too immature for a relationship anyway (not in the sense of being childish but in the sense that you haven't even accomplished the goals you've set out to achieve). But that's just my opinion, if you haven't accomplished your goal in life then you are too immature for a serious relationship. Too many people let that false sense of "security" drive them away from what they want to do with their life and it's really sad to me. You're no more or less secure in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship than you are in a husband/wife relationship. You are not special.

edit: Marriage only shortens it when you think that being married means you have to act a different way to each other. The situation was right and we both had the same outlook on goals and dreams, that's why I got married. Plus it helps that I get tax benefits and hospital visitation rights compared to people that aren't married so more money in my pocket. But that's only a bonus to getting married, not a reason to get married.

You DO realize that a status of "pre pharmacy" has no bearing on life experience. Not everyone that is pre-pharmacy is 22 years old. Some of us have had "real" jobs and have had long-term successful relationships prior to our decision to pursue our "goal in life". Some people never get to accomplish their goal in life for various reasons...does this mean they are too immature for a serious relationship?

Besides, what we want to get out of life can change depending on our circumstances. I think you are just making too many generalizations here...everyone is different. Some people can have commitment outside of marriage and that works for many, many people. Some people choose to get married for whatever reason and others don't. For some, it is part of their religion. Depending on the culture, it can be a rite of passage. But to say that people shouldn't be in a relationship just because they don't want to get married is absolutely absurd. Their relationships can be just as strong, if not stronger, than those who are married.

 

[Farmercyst]

You DO realize that a status of "pre pharmacy" has no bearing on life experience. Not everyone that is pre-pharmacy is 22 years old. Some of us have had "real" jobs and have had long-term successful relationships prior to our decision to pursue our "goal in life". Some people never get to accomplish their goal in life for various reasons...does this mean they are too immature for a serious relationship?

Besides, what we want to get out of life can change depending on our circumstances. I think you are just making too many generalizations here...everyone is different. Some people can have commitment outside of marriage and that works for many, many people. Some people choose to get married for whatever reason and others don't. For some, it is part of their religion. Depending on the culture, it can be a rite of passage. But to say that people shouldn't be in a relationship just because they don't want to get married is absolutely absurd. Their relationships can be just as strong, if not stronger, than those who are married.

Marriage has been transformed into the joke society plays on itself for it's own amusement. If marriage were treated as the lifelong commitment it was meant to be, your last statement would be ridiculous. Unfortunately, because it's more commonly treated as a joke, financial arrangement, security blanket, or other worthless cause, your last statement is far more correct than it should be.

 

[rxlea]

Marriage has been transformed into the joke society plays on itself for it's own amusement. If marriage were treated as the lifelong commitment it was meant to be, your last statement would be ridiculous. Unfortunately, because it's more commonly treated as a joke, financial arrangement, security blanket, or other worthless cause, your last statement is far more correct than it should be.

Exactly. With a 50% divorce rate, I just don't see how marriage is anything "special" anymore outside of getting a bunch of additional rights/privileges. However, I don't see how things like finances, visitation, etc are a worthless cause. The idea that marriage occurs for the purpose of commitment/romantic love is relatively new when you look at the history of human civilization. It was originally treated as an arrangement for the exact reasons you have mentioned. I would just like to, at the very least, have the option either way. Those added benefits are important to me in addition to having my relationship legally recognized for many reasons.

 

[TemSirolimus]

What? Are you that dense that you can't read my posts? Don't you have friends and family to give you comfort? Why do you need a man or a woman to give you that? If you really feel that marriage is a useless institution then you shouldn't be having a boyfriend. Reputation for what? Doing what every American does....sex? Please.

Whether or not you agree with me, your status is "pre-pharmacy". You're too immature for a relationship anyway (not in the sense of being childish but in the sense that you haven't even accomplished the goals you've set out to achieve). But that's just my opinion, if you haven't accomplished your goal in life then you are too immature for a serious relationship. Too many people let that false sense of "security" drive them away from what they want to do with their life and it's really sad to me. You're no more or less secure in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship than you are in a husband/wife relationship. You are not special.

edit: Marriage only shortens it when you think that being married means you have to act a different way to each other. The situation was right and we both had the same outlook on goals and dreams, that's why I got married. Plus it helps that I get tax benefits and hospital visitation rights compared to people that aren't married so more money in my pocket. But that's only a bonus to getting married, not a reason to get married.

you are beginning to sound like a bitter-

different people, different livelihoods, different opinions on different things. There are many reasons why people choose not to get married and yet co-exist happily.

 

[Tinkerbell22]

What? Are you that dense that you can't read my posts? Don't you have friends and family to give you comfort? Why do you need a man or a woman to give you that? If you really feel that marriage is a useless institution then you shouldn't be having a boyfriend. Reputation for what? Doing what every American does....sex? Please.

Whether or not you agree with me, your status is "pre-pharmacy". You're too immature for a relationship anyway (not in the sense of being childish but in the sense that you haven't even accomplished the goals you've set out to achieve). But that's just my opinion, if you haven't accomplished your goal in life then you are too immature for a serious relationship. Too many people let that false sense of "security" drive them away from what they want to do with their life and it's really sad to me. You're no more or less secure in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship than you are in a husband/wife relationship. You are not special.

edit: Marriage only shortens it when you think that being married means you have to act a different way to each other. The situation was right and we both had the same outlook on goals and dreams, that's why I got married. Plus it helps that I get tax benefits and hospital visitation rights compared to people that aren't married so more money in my pocket. But that's only a bonus to getting married, not a reason to get married.

LOL Wow, really? You bring up some really invalid points that have nothing to do with anything I said. I never said I (or anyone else for that matter) needed a man or woman to bring security... what I did say was that having an actual committed "relationship" (not marriage per say) provides security in the sense that if you are having a physical relationship chances are you are at least more monogamous (hopefully) than if you were seeking mutiple booty calls, etc (just one example). I'm sure you studied STIs in pharmacy school (not the only reason by far, but just one reason to stay committed in my personal opinion, everyone is different *which you seem to have a hard time understanding/accepting btw)

Second of all, you are absolutely ridiculous for even insinuating that I shouldn't have boyfriend because I am starting pharmacy school in August. I am 23 years old, I am going to pharmacy school regardless of my relationship status, whether my boyfriend and I last or not. My goals and relationship status have nothing to do with one another. It seems to me like you are the one who is too intolerant and unaccepting of alternative lifestyles and relationship statuses... as a matter of fact, I am a little sad that you would be that intolerant and judgemental as a practicing pharmacist. Tisk.

 

[DrPepsi]

You DO realize that a status of "pre pharmacy" has no bearing on life experience. Not everyone that is pre-pharmacy is 22 years old. Some of us have had "real" jobs and have had long-term successful relationships prior to our decision to pursue our "goal in life". Some people never get to accomplish their goal in life for various reasons...does this mean they are too immature for a serious relationship?

Besides, what we want to get out of life can change depending on our circumstances. I think you are just making too many generalizations here...everyone is different. Some people can have commitment outside of marriage and that works for many, many people. Some people choose to get married for whatever reason and others don't. For some, it is part of their religion. Depending on the culture, it can be a rite of passage. But to say that people shouldn't be in a relationship just because they don't want to get married is absolutely absurd. Their relationships can be just as strong, if not stronger, than those who are married.

Do you not know how discussions work with many people you don't know personally? I can't tailor things to everyone's needs, generalizations are necessary in these kinds of things.

How is it absurd? It's not. People that don't want marriage OR long term commitment shouldn't be having a boyfriend. These men are just temporary excuses for "stability". I think you are having a hard time figuring out that marriage is implied "long term".

Second of all, you are absolutely ridiculous for even insinuating that I shouldn't have boyfriend because I am starting pharmacy school in August. I am 23 years old, I am going to pharmacy school regardless of my relationship status, whether my boyfriend and I last or not. My goals and relationship status have nothing to do with one another. It seems to me like you are the one who is too intolerant and unaccepting of alternative lifestyles and relationship statuses... as a matter of fact, I am a little sad that you would be that intolerant and judgemental as a practicing pharmacist. Tisk.

Wha wha wha what? Do you not read what comes out of this forum? "Another crackhead came to the store today", "stupid druggies wanting their pain meds early", "I absolutely hate medicaid patients". I am a little sad that you think my view of relationships affects my ability to practice pharmacy. Tisk. Who are you to judge me as a pharmacist? How many years as a pharmacist have you worked?

You're 23? Then you're definitely too immature for a relationship. Are you going to look me in the internet eye and tell me that you've completely played the field? I don't think so. It's not that I'm intolerant, it's that I hate seeing guys getting pulled into something that isn't good for them. You claim that your goals and relationships have nothing to do with each other yet you think it's okay for women to steer men off their career path just so they have a "social network"? Pot meet kettle! You aren't a guy (I presume) so I don't like it that you are think it's okay to trap a guy into a relationship that shouldn't be happening. You don't know guys because you aren't one.

you are beginning to sound like a bitter-

I'm beginning to sound like a bitter swiss army hammer? What the hell does that mean?

How am I bitter for telling it like it is? I'm a grown man and I'm way older than most of you. I achieved what I wanted in life and I'm happier than I could ever be. If you don't like hearing what I have to say then don't respond to it. Don't be an immature child and try to tell me that I'm "bitter" for disagreeing with you...it makes you sound like a delusional teenager.

 

[DrPepsi]

I'm sure you studied STIs in pharmacy school (not the only reason by far, but just one reason to stay committed in my personal opinion, everyone is different *which you seem to have a hard time understanding/accepting btw)

....

Ever heard of condoms? By the way, I had a patient a couple of years ago that contracted HIV from her husband. Staying committed to one person is no different from sleeping around when it comes to exposure to infections. Actually quite the opposite, you're more likely to catch something from unprotected sex with one person than protected sex with 10 people.

 

[rxlea]

Do you not know how discussions work with many people you don't know personally? I can't tailor things to everyone's needs, generalizations are necessary in these kinds of things.

How is it absurd? It's not. People that don't want marriage OR long term commitment shouldn't be having a boyfriend. .

Don't patronize me.

That's the thing...many WANT A LONG TERM COMMITMENT WITHOUT IT LEADING TO MARRIAGE and this is the argument some in this thread are trying to make.

 

[rxlea]

....

Ever heard of condoms? By the way, I had a patient a couple of years ago that contracted HIV from her husband. Staying committed to one person is no different from sleeping around when it comes to exposure to infections. Actually quite the opposite, you're more likely to catch something from unprotected sex with one person than protected sex with 10 people.

????? Looks like they weren't committed if they passed HIV to their partner.

 

[DrPepsi]

????? Looks like they weren't committed if they passed HIV to their partner.

We're not talking about the giver, we're talking to the recipient. How is the person infected at a lower rate of exposure? They're not.

Don't patronize me.

That's the thing...many WANT A LONG TERM COMMITMENT WITHOUT IT LEADING TO MARRIAGE and this is the argument some in this thread are trying to make.

Most men don't see a benefit to that. There's nothing wrong with getting a prenup. Our laws and regulations are set up to where couples like that do not get the same benefits that married couples do.

 

[PharmDstudent]

Do you not know how discussions work with many people you don't know personally? I can't tailor things to everyone's needs, generalizations are necessary in these kinds of things.

How is it absurd? It's not. People that don't want marriage OR long term commitment shouldn't be having a boyfriend. These men are just temporary excuses for "stability". I think you are having a hard time figuring out that marriage is implied "long term".

Wha wha wha what? Do you not read what comes out of this forum? "Another crackhead came to the store today", "stupid druggies wanting their pain meds early", "I absolutely hate medicaid patients". I am a little sad that you think my view of relationships affects my ability to practice pharmacy. Tisk. Who are you to judge me as a pharmacist? How many years as a pharmacist have you worked?

What's the difference between a boyfriend and a longterm commitment? Do I have to call him a fiancé or whatever identifier you chose for it to be a long term commitment? Please...

You're 23? Then you're definitely too immature for a relationship. Are you going to look me in the internet eye and tell me that you've completely played the field? I don't think so. It's not that I'm intolerant, it's that I hate seeing guys getting pulled into something that isn't good for them. You claim that your goals and relationships have nothing to do with each other yet you think it's okay for women to steer men off their career path just so they have a "social network"? Pot meet kettle! You aren't a guy (I presume) so I don't like it that you are think it's okay to trap a guy into a relationship that shouldn't be happening. You don't know guys because you aren't one.

Playing the field is a health hazard!

I'm beginning to sound like a bitter swiss army hammer? What the hell does that mean?

If you can't make them agree with you, you can always beat them into submission.
You're just the overbearing type that I find worthless...

How am I bitter for telling it like it is? I'm a grown man and I'm way older than most of you. I achieved what I wanted in life and I'm happier than I could ever be. If you don't like hearing what I have to say then don't respond to it. Don't be an immature child and try to tell me that I'm "bitter" for disagreeing with you...it makes you sound like a delusional teenager.

Telling what like it is? Since when did you become an omniscient god?
So I guess the only way for us to be happy is to act like you. Give me a freakin' break!

 

[PharmDstudent]

????? Looks like they weren't committed if they passed HIV to their partner.

Exactly

 

[DrPepsi]

Playing the field is a health hazard!

There we go. That's all I need to prove that you are way too immature for a relationship. Playing the field does not imply raw unprotected sex with everyone, get real you bozo. I'm not telling you what to do, I'm telling guys what they should avoid which is women like you that want to control men and put them on a leash.

If I'm overbearing it's because your ego is getting in the way. I could care less what you do, in fact if you don't listen to me then that's a good thing. As long as guys head the warning that women like you are a cancer to their lives and career then that's fine. Some people just don't like to hear the truth and you're one of them. I can only feel pity for you and your "man" that loves being a prisoner. Meow meow meow meow, you know what I'm saying...

edit: You're really an idiot, it makes me wonder how you got a Pharm.D. The woman WAS monogamous, not the husband. She decided to not sleep around and look at what it got her: the same deal that you think people that don't sleep around get.

 

[PharmDstudent]

There we go. That's all I need to prove that you are way too immature for a relationship. Playing the field does not imply raw unprotected sex with everyone, get real you bozo. I'm not telling you what to do, I'm telling guys what they should avoid which is women like you that want to control men and put them on a leash.

If I'm overbearing it's because your ego is getting in the way. I could care less what you do, in fact if you don't listen to me then that's a good thing. As long as guys head the warning that women like you are a cancer to their lives and career then that's fine. Some people just don't like to hear the truth and you're one of them. I can only feel pity for you and your "man" that loves being a prisoner. Meow meow meow meow, you know what I'm saying...

edit: You're really an idiot, it makes me wonder how you got a Pharm.D. The woman WAS monogamous, not the husband. She decided to not sleep around and look at what it got her: the same deal that you think people that don't sleep around get.

Condoms don't protect against genital warts if they're present outside of where the condom fits. Wise up!
Oh, and "raw" is not a true medical term relating to sex.

Whenever we met, he wasn't eating, and he had lost his job delivering pizzas. Now, he's a licensed contractor and going to school for engineering.
I think his return on investment far outweighs his status as a "prisoner".


The example you gave was not a monogamous relationship. Plain and simple.

 

[DrPepsi]

Condoms don't protect against genital warts if they're present outside of where the condom fits. Wise up!
Oh, and "raw" is not a true medical term relating to sex.

lol of course "raw" is not a true medical term but most people know it as slang for "no condom" like bareback. Let's get real here.

Whenever we met, he wasn't eating, and he had lost his job delivering pizzas. Now, he's a licensed contractor and going to school for engineering.
I think his return on investment far outweighs his status as a "prisoner".

LOL You say that is if you had anything to do with it. If you did then he shouldn't be bragging, why would anyone brag about their SO buying their career?

The example you gave was not a monogamous relationship. Plain and simple.

That's irrelevant! We're talking about individual people and their exposure. Either way, how do YOU know that he didn't get HIV before he met her? In that case this would have been a monogomous. The topic at hand was that a monogamous relationship is less risky than someone sleeping around.

 

[scoobygrl79]

"raw" is not a true medical term relating to sex.

Playing the field does not imply raw unprotected sex with everyone

women like you that want to control men and put them on a leash.

WHEW! My cheeks are starting to flush just reading this...sorta turning into soft porn.....

 

[rxlea]

Actually, the original topic of this thread was about how to make a LTR last through professional school.