For a first gun, avoid ultralight handguns until you get the basics down pat. If you start with a ultralight, your attempts to mitigate the recoil will produce bad habits that will be hard to break later.
For a 1st handgun, I highly recommend a revolver. Dead nuts reliable. Safe. Easy to learn on. Personally I am a big fan of Smith and Wesson products for new manufacture revolvers. My personal favorite is a S&W model 66-3 which is pre-lock and only carries 6 rounds.
The
Model 627 is a large frame revolver that gives you 8 shots of 357 mag or 38 special in a large framed revolver with good heft.
An even better option is the mid-frame
686 plus with a three inch barrel. Only seven rounds, but a more versatile size. It is still heavy enough to learn on, but small enough to be adopted for more routine carry. Still not as concealable as a small semi-auto, but workable.
If you must go semi-auto, I would recommend a striker fired weapon like a Glock or S&W M&P in 9mm. As long as you choose an appropriate load, there is no need to go bigger. At this time, I would recommend the Glock over the M&P. I shoot several different striker fired handguns and I still choose my Glocks for carry. 9mm for city work and 10mm for woods carry (although I still choose a revolver ahead of either one). The Glock is a great first semi-auto which will hold its value over time should you become interested in something else. If you want to go to the trouble of installing a action kit on the M&P then it starts to rival the Glock. Still I prefer the latter.
There is also the consideration, depending on the jurisdiction that you live in, that having a gun for home protection that is similar to what law enforcement carries may be more favorable in the eyes of a jury than a more "aggressive" appearing gun like a 44 mag etc. The Glock 9mm fills this bill nicely.
Certainly many departments are going to the 40, but that is primarily because they need to be able to shoot through barriers like car doors, windshields etc. The 40 is marginally superior in this role, although the additional recoil and muzzle blast outweighs this marginal benefit in my mind, especially for the new shooter.
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