Taking a Vote

[2015LifeCrisis]

Dear everyone,

I am not sure I am even posting this to the write forum or if there is even a forum for this. I am sorry but I need serious help!!

I have been in love (maybe not love, but a pretty serious crush) with this man for too many years to count. Every year I make a new years resolution to tell him how I feel. Every year, I fail. Now, it is December 2015 and I still haven't told him anything. Sigh. I am so pathetic.

My loved ones say I should forget about him for the following reasons:

1.) I am a doctor and make 6 figures and... he makes like $12 an hour.
2.) He is a veteran and they say he probably has some sort of PTSD (maybe true).
3.) We now live pretty far away (aka about 3 hours by airplane).
4.) There is a strong likelihood that he doesn't even think twice about me.

Anyhow, I here is why I feel like I should say something.

1.) I have been crazy about him forever and I think about him all the time (I haven't had a healthy relationship with anyone else because of this. Like, I called off an engagement because of him.)
2.) I don't think anything would happen if I tell him but I think I need to do it for closure purposes.

So, before I drag this on to 2016, I am taking a vote. Should I tell him or not?

And, if I should tell him, should I..

1.) Go over to his house and knock on his door and just tell him?
2.) Write him a letter by snail mail?
3.) Write him a Facebook, Twitter, etc.??

For the love of my sanity, any advice will do!!!

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[WhtsThFrequency]

Dear everyone,

I am not sure I am even posting this to the write forum or if there is even a forum for this. I am sorry but I need serious help!!

I have been in love (maybe not love, but a pretty serious crush) with this man for too many years to count. Every year I make a new years resolution to tell him how I feel. Every year, I fail. Now, it is December 2015 and I still haven't told him anything. Sigh. I am so pathetic.

My loved ones say I should forget about him for the following reasons:

1.) I am a doctor and make 6 figures and... he makes like $12 an hour.
2.) He is a veteran and they say he probably has some sort of PTSD (maybe true).
3.) We now live pretty far away (aka about 3 hours by airplane).
4.) There is a strong likelihood that he doesn't even think twice about me.

Anyhow, I here is why I feel like I should say something.

1.) I have been crazy about him forever and I think about him all the time (I haven't had a healthy relationship with anyone else because of this. Like, I called off an engagement because of him.)
2.) I don't think anything would happen if I tell him but I think I need to do it for closure purposes.

So, before I drag this on to 2016, I am taking a vote. Should I tell him or not?

And, if I should tell him, should I..

1.) Go over to his house and knock on his door and just tell him?
2.) Write him a letter by snail mail?
3.) Write him a Facebook, Twitter, etc.??

For the love of my sanity, any advice will do!!!

None of the above.

Your levels of obsession are frighteningly high and likely border on stalking.

You need therapy. Leave the poor guy alone and make an appointment with a psychiatrist.

 

[2015LifeCrisis]

None of the above.

Your levels of obsession are frighteningly high and likely border on stalking.

You need therapy. Leave the poor guy alone and make an appointment with a psychiatrist.

Lol. I am not a stalker. I haven't talked to in over a year now. It is a little obsessive. I agree with that. But I think everyone has that someone that got away.

I think it is just a regret. I knew him when I simply a cashier and I just always enjoy being around him. He even encouraged me to go to school. I actually kinda wish I never did because then maybe things would be different. It is just a regret I carry that's all.

 

[WhtsThFrequency]

You broke off an engagement for this guy who you barely know, who lives hours and hours away from you, with whom you have never had a romantic relationship and whose feelings about you are unknown. You flat out admit you cannot have a normal dating life because you are obsessed with this guy.

That is more than just a "little obsessive". It's unhealthy and weird. Stop romanticizing it.

You sound like a lovelorn child rather than an actual doctor. Get therapy.

 

[J ROD]

It sounds like you built this up in your head and the actual results will more than likely not be what you built.

I would see if the guy wants to meet up. If he says yes, then meet him and tell him.

If he says no, move on and take that as closure.

I also think some time on the couch with a psychologist would be useful.

 

[touchpause13]

Therapy.

 

[member000000000]

Next time you are in town, ask him to coffee or something. Casually mention that you had a crush on him before and see how he responds.

I wouldn't send a letter or message online. At least if he says no, he doesn't have your long time secret at his fingertips to show to other ppl.

I definitely don't think you therapy btw. I do think that putting a person on such a pedestal will only set you up to be let down. Even if you guys date, he may never live up to your expectations. No one will.

Actually, a date with him is exactly what you need. After your date does away with this "ideal man" you have in your head, you can really fall in love either with your "crush", or the guy you meet after him. Lol.

Good luck and let me know how it turns out..... I feel like this is right before the climax of a romantic comedy.

 

[TallPreMed]

"Pedal stool"... Sorry I had to laugh at this. I hope it's an autocorrect fail! Lol

 

[Kaustikos]

No, you shouldn't tell him.
But the reason we think you need help is because you haven't given us any info that makes us think you have anything.
You don't mention any moments. No conversations. Nothing. If we were to follow your advice, I'd contact Mila Kunis and tell her how I feel.
If I were single...
And if I could even get to her without a restraining order or sounding crazy.
"Hey girl, I saw your movies and was like heeeeeeyyyyyyy. Let's grab a drink"