- Joined
- Nov 14, 2009
- Messages
- 505
- Reaction score
- 19
I lived in a house with 6 people and two of them died; one I considered marrying.
One died 8 months before I came back. The other died while I was in medical school 1st year. I got through 1st year fine. second year I met 'another love'; he was the cousin of a classmate of mine. We met; we fell instantly in love. Two days after we met ' we were saying to each other 'are you single?" and he said 'are you single". And when asked ; he said I could see " a lifetime relationship with me".
Well, Something happened in the medical school. a psychopath professor was on staff and entrapped a bunch of students into a bad 'academic dishonesty' situation. It almost ruined my life; I could not finish school in that state. I took a year off; went back; took another year off and said 'screw this' because the pedophile ended up as my patient on my psych rotation. UNETHICAL.
After 150k in debt, I saved my sanity and started school elsewhere. At one point, my 'new love' said " I can't imagine you being a doctor". ugh? huh? He was 35 at the time, I was 29. Then he said " you have to get over this last love and finish school' so we can move forward. Well, he started competing with a dead lover.
So I am 7 weeks from finishing medical school and one Step2ck to pass. And I will have salvaged my career from this whole mess. But I lost this so called 'love"
He would say " I am not happy"; but not be able to identify why he was not happy. Because we were 3k miles apart trying to maintain a relationship maybe; because his male ego would not follow me ' the doc"?
Then I met another man who 'recovered from the same injury' my old lover died from; and found a will to live. and was highly spiritual and evolved and we connected on a spiritual level (never giving the physical a chance). He was 3k miles away on the other coast. and then he got another woman pregnant and well we have not spoken in ages.
I think after all his injuries and rehab; he did not want to marry a doctor. Why do people put doctors on pedestals? I think he was too scared to ever be hurt again and that includes ever having someone die on him (which is what happened to me). He deep down did not want this pain so he married a younger woman by 26 years and now I am sure he will die before she does. That is his journey.
I am back in my home state arund friends and family that I grew up with who love me, but I am beginning to wonder if I am supposed to be single the rest of my life. I feel like I have lived 9 lives already.
One died 8 months before I came back. The other died while I was in medical school 1st year. I got through 1st year fine. second year I met 'another love'; he was the cousin of a classmate of mine. We met; we fell instantly in love. Two days after we met ' we were saying to each other 'are you single?" and he said 'are you single". And when asked ; he said I could see " a lifetime relationship with me".
Well, Something happened in the medical school. a psychopath professor was on staff and entrapped a bunch of students into a bad 'academic dishonesty' situation. It almost ruined my life; I could not finish school in that state. I took a year off; went back; took another year off and said 'screw this' because the pedophile ended up as my patient on my psych rotation. UNETHICAL.
After 150k in debt, I saved my sanity and started school elsewhere. At one point, my 'new love' said " I can't imagine you being a doctor". ugh? huh? He was 35 at the time, I was 29. Then he said " you have to get over this last love and finish school' so we can move forward. Well, he started competing with a dead lover.
So I am 7 weeks from finishing medical school and one Step2ck to pass. And I will have salvaged my career from this whole mess. But I lost this so called 'love"
He would say " I am not happy"; but not be able to identify why he was not happy. Because we were 3k miles apart trying to maintain a relationship maybe; because his male ego would not follow me ' the doc"?
Then I met another man who 'recovered from the same injury' my old lover died from; and found a will to live. and was highly spiritual and evolved and we connected on a spiritual level (never giving the physical a chance). He was 3k miles away on the other coast. and then he got another woman pregnant and well we have not spoken in ages.
I think after all his injuries and rehab; he did not want to marry a doctor. Why do people put doctors on pedestals? I think he was too scared to ever be hurt again and that includes ever having someone die on him (which is what happened to me). He deep down did not want this pain so he married a younger woman by 26 years and now I am sure he will die before she does. That is his journey.
I am back in my home state arund friends and family that I grew up with who love me, but I am beginning to wonder if I am supposed to be single the rest of my life. I feel like I have lived 9 lives already.
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