Female medical student and feeling like I will be forever alone

[yehhhboiii]

Bit of a MILF Hunter, eh?

nah it's that women don't play those silly games. it's refreshing

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[tco]

No.

When I was in my 20s, I preferred having sex with men. Still do.

Always have, as a heterosexual female.



That may very well be true for you although you may be surprised at how things change as you age. Even if you don't, there are plenty of men who are attracted to women over 26 and some even prefer older women (and not all of us are lacking perkiness and firmness. I am personally in much better physical shape than ALL of the mid-20s girls working for me).

Again, sup?

 

[tiedyeddog]

IRL or not, the **** is real lol. Being beta will not get you girls. It's really not misc crap... it's just how chicks are. Maybe I cannot speak for chicks 30+, but definitely for girls in their 20's. Source: personal experience

Having to totally alter how you interact with women and be a huge tool is the definition of being insecure with who you truly are, just as Zyzz and his fanboys were totally insecure with themselves which is self evident by their need for 'roid use. Any dude who resorts to that is the epitome of insecurity.

 

[PrideNeverDie]

Having to totally alter how you interact with women and be a huge tool is the definition of being insecure with who you truly are, just as Zyzz and his fanboys were totally insecure with themselves which is self evident by their need for 'roid use. Any dude who resorts to that is the epitome of insecurity.

watch out! we got a badass over here.

 

[PrideNeverDie]

Many of my female preceptors are 40+ and alone, with no family nearby so they live alone (with their cat/dog). I didn't have the guts to ask them if they regret becoming a doctor, but I often wonder. They seem like normal females, and are attractive for their age. Yet they seem so miserable and take their misery out upon me. So I wonder.

better they die miserable and alone then settling for a nice guy and making his life miserable as well

 

[tiedyeddog]

watch out! we got a badass over here.

Lol, I know, it hurts a bit to think about it.

 

[yehhhboiii]

Having to totally alter how you interact with women and be a huge tool is the definition of being insecure with who you truly are, just as Zyzz and his fanboys were totally insecure with themselves which is self evident by their need for 'roid use. Any dude who resorts to that is the epitome of insecurity.

r.i.p.

 

[Winged Scapula]

Many of my female preceptors are 40+ and alone, with no family nearby so they live alone (with their cat/dog).

What does lack of family have to do with living alone? Outside of caring for a disabled parents or sibling, most American 40 year-olds with a stable job don't want to live with their parents.

I didn't have the guts to ask them if they regret becoming a doctor, but I often wonder. They seem like normal females, and are attractive for their age. Yet they seem so miserable and take their misery out upon me. So I wonder.

Are you sure being single is the reason that they're miserable and not their job? That might be a factor but we can't assume unless they have told you explicitly. Not every woman who is over 40 and single is that way by chance.

 

[Arkangeloid]

Many of my female preceptors are 40+ and alone, with no family nearby so they live alone (with their cat/dog). I didn't have the guts to ask them if they regret becoming a doctor, but I often wonder. They seem like normal females, and are attractive for their age. Yet they seem so miserable and take their misery out upon me. So I wonder.

What specialty?

If you want to have children before you can't anymore or before no "good man [in a woman's words]" wants to be with you, then maybe you shouldn't do General Surgery hahaha.

Same with dudes: if you want to be some big player pimp mack daddy who takes girls homes from the bar every Friday or Saturday, perhaps IM isn't the best choice.

What does lack of family have to do with living alone? Outside of caring for a disabled parents or sibling, most American 40 year-olds with a stable job don't want to live with their parents.

Not gonna lie, I kind of want to do a residency at the teaching hospital in my hometown just so if I'm married with children by then, I can dump them at grandma's.

 

[link2swim06]

What specialty?

If you want to have children before you can't anymore or before no "good man [in a woman's words]" wants to be with you, then maybe you shouldn't do General Surgery hahaha.

Same with dudes: if you want to be some big player pimp mack daddy who takes girls homes from the bar every Friday or Saturday, perhaps IM isn't the best choice.





Not gonna lie, I kind of want to do a residency at the teaching hospital in my hometown just so if I'm married with children by then, I can dump them at grandma's.

 

[Arkangeloid]

?

I thought IM and its subs (unless you count Endo) wasn't typically associated with a good lifestyle.

 

[Winged Scapula]

Not gonna lie, I kind of want to do a residency at the teaching hospital in my hometown just so if I'm married with children by then, I can dump them at grandma's.

That's actually a very smart thing to do. Having extended family around when you have children especially during residency is a good idea.

 

[link2swim06]

?

I thought IM and its subs (unless you count Endo) wasn't typically associated with a good lifestyle.

If you are counting specialties off IM too then you are very mistaken (several specialties can rival the pay of ortho).

But even IM can still have decent pay and make multiple times more than 97% of Americans. If you still can't impress a girl then it has nothing to do with your income.

In truth the average IM doctor would probably have more time off to go find women than the typical general surgeon.

 

[Prince090]

This thread is entertaining and interesting at the same time.Popcorn,any one ?

 

[RiverRun]

There's a few married people in my class. They are generally well below-average in looks.

Is it possible your married classmates simply stopped trying? Way more pressure to look good if you're single and looking for something.

You don't know what you're talking about. Girls (even your sweet little significant other) are deep down attracted to "bad boy" alpha males. It's in their DNA. Can't change millions of years of evolution. They like to be treated like ****, told what to do, slapped around and have their hair pulled, etc. Dont let them fool you.

Doesn't seem like an evolutionarily stable strategy, really. It may be in our DNA to be attracted to alpha males, because alpha male status is correlated with access to resources and women, at the base of it, desire a man who can provide resources for any offspring, but its hardly in our DNA to desire a male mate whom we associate with negative feelings or violence. Not a great environment for young that are born completely helpless.

As an aside, I don't think I'd be comfortable as a patient of yours. Yes, I'm pre-med, and maybe I'm naive, but it scares the hell out of me that there are people who have successfully gotten into med school that take pop psychology to the extreme. Where did you read this, GQ?

You must be talking about girls or women who lack self-confidence or esteem and think that this is what they deserve or that's the way good men act.

That's not what psychologically normal women want.

Thank you.

I know you think he's a douche but he's right. If varies how much but girls like you better when you treat them like ****. I've seen it and its also come from their mouths directly. They don't like nice guys. And for the record, basically 95% of women lack self-confidence. Why do you think girls tell each other they're beautiful all of the time?

There's a classic article in anthropology called "Who Gets Heard And Why?" Basically, men and women differ in their adult interactions because of the way they learn to interact as children. Boys gain status by showing their dominance, girls gain status by building trust and relationships. So for someone who grew up learning that to gain status, you must take someone down, I understand why you might be confused when we compliment each other. It's not so much lack of confidence than a way to build relationships.

Also surprised someone hasn't pointed this out yet, but if you treat someone like ****, they will lose self confidence. Likewise, if you treat someone well, they will gain confidence. So I think this whole girls "like" you better when you treat them poorly/95% of women lack self confidence thing is a vicious cycle. My advice to you? Stop acting like a jerk, and you'll be amazed how confident the women around you become.

 

[Kahreek]

he is not talking about violence, he is talking about being assertive. And being rough in bed is not violence.

 

[swallday6400]

Is it possible your married classmates simply stopped trying? Way more pressure to look good if you're single and looking for something.



Doesn't seem like an evolutionarily stable strategy, really. It may be in our DNA to be attracted to alpha males, because alpha male status is correlated with access to resources and women, at the base of it, desire a man who can provide resources for any offspring, but its hardly in our DNA to desire a male mate whom we associate with negative feelings or violence. Not a great environment for young that are born completely helpless.

As an aside, I don't think I'd be comfortable as a patient of yours. Yes, I'm pre-med, and maybe I'm naive, but it scares the hell out of me that there are people who have successfully gotten into med school that take pop psychology to the extreme. Where did you read this, GQ?



Thank you.



There's a classic article in anthropology called "Who Gets Heard And Why?" Basically, men and women differ in their adult interactions because of the way they learn to interact as children. Boys gain status by showing their dominance, girls gain status by building trust and relationships. So for someone who grew up learning that to gain status, you must take someone down, I understand why you might be confused when we compliment each other. It's not so much lack of confidence than a way to build relationships.

Also surprised someone hasn't pointed this out yet, but if you treat someone like ****, they will lose self confidence. Likewise, if you treat someone well, they will gain confidence. So I think this whole girls "like" you better when you treat them poorly/95% of women lack self confidence thing is a vicious cycle. My advice to you? Stop acting like a jerk, and you'll be amazed how confident the women around you become.

I'm sorry I had to post again. Yes, your right about girls complimenting each other. Women compliment each other to build relationships, start conversations, and feel closer. If a girl wants to talk to another girl she likes, she'll say how nice her dress is or glasses are. Your right. But the fact is, women are very insecure no matter how you slice the cake. And I can give examples about what they say that would illustrate this fact but that would take this thread straight to hell .
And I'm not saying you gotta treat the girl like bottom of the **** but it varies. Women like a man who is assertive. Some really like it when you treat them like **** while others like guys who put them in their place and tell them no sometimes. And it can be playful. But they like to be dominated in some way, because they are deep down insecure. That's all im saying.

 

[RiverRun]

I agree that being rough in bed isn't violence, and that IJL saying women "like to...have their hair pulled" does simply seem to refer to rough(ish) sex, but saying that women "like to be treated like ****...slapped around" seems to indicate behavior outside of the bedroom.

Of course, I'm making conjectures, and it's really only fair for IJL to say what he meant here, but "slapped around" has a very specific connotation in my mind. Maybe that's just me.

Swallday, I think what I'm trying to get at is the difference between being assertive, which can be a very positive thing, and being a jerk. I completely agree that women like a man who is assertive, but it's completely possible to be assertive, and be an alpha male, without treating others poorly. Though it's anecdotal, I've seen it done; my current male partner hits the nail on the head in that respect. And for the record, I am attracted to alpha males. I don't think I could be attracted to someone who wasn't assertive, but I also find it extremely difficult to be attracted to someone if there's a power differential, which I feel a large part of this discussion implies. I become decidedly unattracted to someone if it becomes clear that they will dominate me in some way. But yet again, maybe I'm unique in that respect.

 

[monkeyMD]

I'm sorry I had to post again. Yes, your right about girls complimenting each other. Women compliment each other to build relationships, start conversations, and feel closer. If a girl wants to talk to another girl she likes, she'll say how nice her dress is or glasses are. Your right. But the fact is, women are very insecure no matter how you slice the cake. And I can give examples about what they say that would illustrate this fact but that would take this thread straight to hell .
And I'm not saying you gotta treat the girl like bottom of the **** but it varies. Women like a man who is assertive. Some really like it when you treat them like **** while others like guys who put them in their place and tell them no sometimes. And it can be playful. But they like to be dominated in some way, because they are deep down insecure. That's all im saying.

Are you a chick?
Honest curiosity.

 

[Waunder22]

And I'm not saying you gotta treat the girl like bottom of the **** but it varies. Women like a man who is assertive. Some really like it when you treat them like **** while others like guys who put them in their place and tell them no sometimes. And it can be playful. But they like to be dominated in some way, because they are deep down insecure. That's all im saying.

I am not sure where you are getting this insecurity crap. If you are a girl, you must be one of the 95% who are insecure (based on your own statistics). If you are a guy, then you seriosuly do not know girls.

Yes, there are insecure girls but no, they do not make up 95% of the entire female population. And if anything, I am sure the female student population at any given medical school will have a lower percentage of insecure individuals than the general population.

I do not like guys that are pushovers but the ones that think they can tell me what to do or treat be like crap??? Sorry to burst your bubble, but those types are not even valuable as friends let alone partners.

Yes, there are drama queens and many girls are insecure. But please do not make generalizations and create statistics, especially in a forum that is full of girls who are confident, driven and successful. I find that offending.

 

[swallday6400]

Are you a chick?
Honest curiosity.

No I'm a dude. Just lucky to know chicks who were not bashful about their shallowness instead of chicks who play like their not.

 

[link2swim06]

I am not sure where you are getting this insecurity crap. If you are a girl, you must be one of the 95% who are insecure (based on your own statistics). If you are a guy, then you seriosuly do not know girls.

Yes, there are insecure girls but no, they do not make up 95% of the entire female population. And if anything, I am sure the female student population at any given medical school will have a lower percentage of insecure individuals than the general population.

I do not like guys that are pushovers but the ones that think they can tell me what to do or treat be like crap??? Sorry to burst your bubble, but those types are not even valuable as friends let alone partners.

Yes, there are drama queens and many girls are insecure. But please do not make generalizations and create statistics, especially in a forum that is full of girls who are confident, driven and successful. I find that offending.

You aren't good at forums or just have poor short term memory, huh?

Just yesterday you said:

Guys are going to always want the younger girl.

Or is this anti-generalization thing just a new idea you came up with today?

 

[thefritz]

To all the single girls who keep posting saying things like "i'm attractive but can't find a guy..." how often do you get hit on? Seriously. If you really are that attractive and are in public, you should be getting hit on multiple times a week, if not daily.

My guess is that you all aren't as attractive as you think you are. In my experience, girls always think they are more attractive than they really are. The 8/10 girls are the worst. Their identity is so wrapped up in their looks they can literally be brought to tears by suggesting they are anything other than a perfect 10. Incredibly shallow and insecure due to the true 9s and 10s out there. Here's a wake up call for you: In 10 years, your looks will be gone, you will have wrinkles, your boobs will start sagging, and you'll have some extra weight. Life isn't over after age 35. The sooner you can disassociate your self-worth from your 'hotness', the happier you'll be in life.

Suggestion on how to find a guy? Stop telling yourself and everyone else how attractive you are and try to take looks out of the picture -- this will build up your confidence. Next, open your mind and consider dating a man who is not a doctor or banker with 5% body fat.

 

[swallday6400]

I am not sure where you are getting this insecurity crap. If you are a girl, you must be one of the 95% who are insecure (based on your own statistics). If you are a guy, then you seriosuly do not know girls.

Yes, there are insecure girls but no, they do not make up 95% of the entire female population. And if anything, I am sure the female student population at any given medical school will have a lower percentage of insecure individuals than the general population.

I do not like guys that are pushovers but the ones that think they can tell me what to do or treat be like crap??? Sorry to burst your bubble, but those types are not even valuable as friends let alone partners.

Yes, there are drama queens and many girls are insecure. But please do not make generalizations and create statistics, especially in a forum that is full of girls who are confident, driven and successful. I find that offending.

Lol. That's why I'm calling you out. Anyone reading your first post can tell your not a confident person. Whats wrong with admitting your insecure? Your not fooling anyone OP.....

 

[yellowcocopuffs]

Op, :troll:

Lol. That's why I'm calling you out. Anyone reading your first post can tell your not a confident person. Whats wrong with admitting your insecure? Your not fooling anyone OP.....

Anyone else notice this poster's ridic grammatical errors?

In defense of the OP, please lets not pretend to know anyone based on a few posts. Take a chillpill, swallday6400.

 

[qtpai]

Me me me me me me. I don't want to be foreveralone, but I'm not looking for a boyfriend or anything. Anyone else feel lonely? By the way I'm not depressed.

Sure you may not be depressed, but you sound narcissistic and confused as ****, and you know what my experience says: depression, confusion, and narcissism walk hand-in-hand. And in a thread wondering whether others feel the same, about being forever alone? I'll reference the poster above and call bull****.

I found a girl in her early 20s. I'm in my late 20s. She's not the easiest to deal with. But she doesn't need me to be a movie star. And by being a bit modest, she never worries about never being in a relationship.

If for whatever reason the relationship doesn't work out, as far as cock carouseling crazies, I can smell them a mile away. Next please.

On the other hand, the last thing in the world I would want is a woman with a lot of dating experience. Yeah, sure, "mature." Mature as in has spent the fertile years dating thugs in serial short term relationships? This isn't immaturity. It is madness. It is red flag for a history of self destructive behavior and a constitutional character deficiency. That stuff doesn't change over time. It just buries itself.

I'll accept a history of immaturity, but not a history of delusion. I'm not looking to validate or reinforce the madness of younger women by giving concessions to older ones that refused to accept the basic tenets of civilized behavior, because they thought they could "settle down" after being jackasses. You've got the scarlet letter.

So let's see. Standards. Under 25, and civilized? This might exclude a good 95% of the female population in the States but not all is lost. There are still nice girls in the South... and East Asia. Not all cultures, or all parts of our culture, have rejected sanity.

 

[Kahreek]

historically women were up for grabs, they were only as strong as her man. That's why swallday is talking about insecure being a female trait.

 

[primarycaretodd]

You'll find that a lot of eligible bachelors may be in your med school class and you don't even really know it. Don't be afraid to approach dudes in the class. Some of them just haven't had enough time to get un-single because of the demands of medical school and may be relieved when the woman makes the first move.

 

[514901]

Is it possible your married classmates simply stopped trying? Way more pressure to look good if you're single and looking for something.



Well Like I said, they are well-below average. I mean, if you're balding/bald in your 20s and not in good shape then you're more going to be more inclined to seek out a mate. Just from experience, married people try to pretend like they are in some sort of secure blissful situation but not one of them is even remotely content.

 

[Maddie90]

To all the single girls who keep posting saying things like "i'm attractive but can't find a guy..." how often do you get hit on? Seriously. If you really are that attractive and are in public, you should be getting hit on multiple times a week, if not daily.

I'm in a similar situation as OP, feeling like everyone else is coupling off in my class. As for this question, I don't overtly get hit on nowadays in the hospital or anything, but have noticed some of the male residents and sub-is do go out of their way to help me since I just started my third year. In any other context, it would be nice, but I feel like the hospital is where I am to work and learn and isn't the right place... I think my biggest issue is to figure out whether I want to date or just focus solely on my clerkships.

 

[JP2740]

Having to totally alter how you interact with women and be a huge tool is the definition of being insecure with who you truly are, just as Zyzz and his fanboys were totally insecure with themselves which is self evident by their need for 'roid use. Any dude who resorts to that is the epitome of insecurity.

Actually it's quite the contrary for myself at least. I now act like myself around chicks. Instead of worrying about what I say or do or offending them etc.

 

[tiedyeddog]

Actually it's quite the contrary for myself at least. I now act like myself around chicks. Instead of worrying about what I say or do or offending them etc.

So you were an ******* to begin with?

I too am an ******* and embrace that about myself, as you can tell, so I feel you on that. I am just saying if your natural tendency is to be a nice guy then be a nice guy, you'll find a mate. Unless your into air headed chicks with emotional baggage. In that case be an alpha all day long.

 

[514901]

I'm in a similar situation as OP, feeling like everyone else is coupling off in my class. As for this question, I don't overtly get hit on nowadays in the hospital or anything, but have noticed some of the male residents and sub-is do go out of their way to help me since I just started my third year. In any other context, it would be nice, but I feel like the hospital is where I am to work and learn and isn't the right place... I think my biggest issue is to figure out whether I want to date or just focus solely on my clerkships.

They're being nice to you because they know any disgruntled female student represents potential litigation.

 

[thefritz]

I think my biggest issue is to figure out whether I want to date or just focus solely on my clerkships.

Oh come on, I was in a serious relationship and worked 20-30 hours a week during my third year nights and weekends (except the surgery rotation). I was far from the best student, but I still managed to get a couple of honors and found time to work out and go to the movies. Don't put off your life because of third year. It's not nearly as important as people make it out to be. It's a year of glorified shadowing. Just get through it and spend some time outside of the hospital meeting people. You could be dead in a year, live your life now. You don't need a 290 on step 2 and honors in everything.

 

[thefritz]

Don't be afraid to approach dudes in the class. Some of them just haven't had enough time to get un-single because of the demands of medical school and may be relieved when the woman makes the first move.

Be careful doing this. It's rare for a girl to approach a guy directly and you'll likely scare him away. The best way for a girl to make the first move is to do it subtly. A good example used by a lot of girls is to simply sit next to him in class. People usually sit in the same spots every day in class and there are usually empty seats. If you go sit right next to a guy you're interested in one day (I mean in the seat directly beside him when there are lots of other seats open), you are making a move without being weird and not having to worry about getting shot down and being humiliated everytime you see him from then on. If he's interested, he'll talk to you. Girls would do this to me occasionally in college. I was way too stressed out to notice/care and wondered wtf they would sit right next to me and cross their legs towards me, then one day I figured it out

 

[Maddie90]

Oh come on, I was in a serious relationship and worked 20-30 hours a week during my third year nights and weekends (except the surgery rotation). I was far from the best student, but I still managed to get a couple of honors and found time to work out and go to the movies. Don't put off your life because of third year. It's not nearly as important as people make it out to be. It's a year of glorified shadowing. Just get through it and spend some time outside of the hospital meeting people. You could be dead in a year, live your life now. You don't need a 290 on step 2 and honors in everything.

I definitely see your point, but it's one thing to maintain a steady relationship and another to start one. I feel like meeting someone and getting to know him takes substantially more mental and emotional energy. It's also the super fun and exciting stage and part of me doesn't only want to give them the leftovers of my time and energy. However, if I do go along that line of reasoning... there will never be a right time.

 

[Winged Scapula]

I definitely see your point, but it's one thing to maintain a steady relationship and another to start one. I feel like meeting someone and getting to know him takes substantially more mental and emotional energy. It's also the super fun and exciting stage and part of me doesn't only want to give them the leftovers of my time and energy. However, if I do go along that line of reasoning... there will never be a right time.

Exactly.

If I could meet my SO during the first month of a pre-80 hour work week (ie, no hour restrictions) general surgery internship and start a relationship, surely time is not a significant factor. If you want to make something happen, you will find a way.

 

[startswithb]

No.

When I was in my 20s, I preferred having sex with men. Still do.

Always have, as a heterosexual female.



That may very well be true for you although you may be surprised at how things change as you age. Even if you don't, there are plenty of men who are attracted to women over 26 and some even prefer older women (and not all of us are lacking perkiness and firmness. I am personally in much better physical shape than ALL of the mid-20s girls working for me).

You go, girl!

 

[Happy3nding]

Many of my female preceptors are 40+ and alone, with no family nearby so they live alone (with their cat/dog). I didn't have the guts to ask them if they regret becoming a doctor, but I often wonder. They seem like normal females, and are attractive for their age. Yet they seem so miserable and take their misery out upon me. So I wonder.

Physicians have had the some of the highest rates of suicide measured over the last few years. Female physicians are particularly affected. Hmmm I wonder why

 

[thefritz]

I definitely see your point, but it's one thing to maintain a steady relationship and another to start one. I feel like meeting someone and getting to know him takes substantially more mental and emotional energy. It's also the super fun and exciting stage and part of me doesn't only want to give them the leftovers of my time and energy. However, if I do go along that line of reasoning... there will never be a right time.

Look at it this way. When you are dating someone new and are all giddy for those first few months, it will make whatever 80 hour per week hell you are going through seem like some great times when you look back.

 

[Happy3nding]

This is something I see on this website a lot and took me a while to figure out myself. How much money you have matters very little (at least when you're in your 20s). So many posts from (usually foreign) students coming to med school because they want a girl. What matters is status. No amount of money can make up for acting like a loser. Go ahead and roll up to your first social in med school in your dad's Bentley. When everyone learns that you can't hold a conversation involving anything other than what residency you want to go into, spend 10 hours a day playing world of warcraft, and haven't exercised since gym class in 10th grade, nobody will care that you have a 50 million dollar trust fund. All the girls will be interested in the poor, but good-looking fit personable guy with the smoking hot girlfriend. Btw, and I'm not making this up -- the single most effective thing to make yourself attractive to girls is having a supermodel around your arm (they subconsciously think that if they can get around your arm, then that makes them better than your current ms. tenouttaten - and that's the status they crave). Having a ton of money is way, way down the list on things that matter. True golddiggers are actually pretty rare. It's funny to watch rich guys utterly fail at relationships because they think that every girl is after their money, then at the same time get frustrated when they can't pick up chicks by bragging about their inheritance.

There is much truth to this. However, many women will simply not date men who are less successful than they. As such, I stand by my analogy. The $$$ is like a MCAT score. But if you're a POS you're still not getting into medical school. Some women will screen out applicants at a 22... others will require a 35 (98th percentile for the MCAT)

 

[addy]

No, he's right.

Most women (and men) are *****s when they're young. They just don't realize it until they get older.

I know - I was one once.

This.

 

[Anastomoses]

You don't know what you're talking about. Girls (even your sweet little significant other) are deep down attracted to "bad boy" alpha males. It's in their DNA. Can't change millions of years of evolution. They like to be treated like ****, told what to do, slapped around and have their hair pulled, etc. Dont let them fool you.

you sound nuts.

You must be talking about girls or women who lack self-confidence or esteem and think that this is what they deserve or that's the way good men act.

That's not what psychologically normal women want.

guys who act like that don't have natural confidence so they try to use these weird toxic tricks to target sad types.

 

[yehhhboiii]

Be careful doing this. It's rare for a girl to approach a guy directly and you'll likely scare him away. The best way for a girl to make the first move is to do it subtly. A good example used by a lot of girls is to simply sit next to him in class. People usually sit in the same spots every day in class and there are usually empty seats. If you go sit right next to a guy you're interested in one day (I mean in the seat directly beside him when there are lots of other seats open), you are making a move without being weird and not having to worry about getting shot down and being humiliated everytime you see him from then on. If he's interested, he'll talk to you. Girls would do this to me occasionally in college. I was way too stressed out to notice/care and wondered wtf they would sit right next to me and cross their legs towards me, then one day I figured it out

damn that's oblivious

 

[Trogghunter]

Men age like wine, women age like spinach.

 

[Anastomoses]

Every girl I've dated has been a year older than me for some reason.

every guy i date is two years younger.

People hate what they can't bang. I honestly felt the same way at one point in my life. Then I started working out and acting like a jerk. True story

wrong. i find older men totally repulsive. not trying to bang that. yuck. and plenty of guys 5 years younger lapping at my feet. what reality are you living in?

 

[Anastomoses]

Men age like wine, women age like spinach.

no wine i like has a pot belly, and pores the size i could fall into.

 

[CDI]

Damn. This thread delivered but I neglected it. Tough to catch up.

 

[Anastomoses]

To all the single girls who keep posting saying things like "i'm attractive but can't find a guy..." how often do you get hit on? Seriously. If you really are that attractive and are in public, you should be getting hit on multiple times a week, if not daily.

My guess is that you all aren't as attractive as you think you are. In my experience, girls always think they are more attractive than they really are. The 8/10 girls are the worst. Their identity is so wrapped up in their looks they can literally be brought to tears by suggesting they are anything other than a perfect 10. Incredibly shallow and insecure due to the true 9s and 10s out there. Here's a wake up call for you: In 10 years, your looks will be gone, you will have wrinkles, your boobs will start sagging, and you'll have some extra weight. Life isn't over after age 35. The sooner you can disassociate your self-worth from your 'hotness', the happier you'll be in life.

Suggestion on how to find a guy? Stop telling yourself and everyone else how attractive you are and try to take looks out of the picture -- this will build up your confidence. Next, open your mind and consider dating a man who is not a doctor or banker with 5% body fat.

fritzy, for being so bad at anatomy, you're pretty insightful. studies actually show women think they are less attractive than they are. and OP never claimed to be crazy hot. she said she's not unattractive. there is a range. but i think it's sickening that we even train girls to attach their self worth so strongly with looks. i happily think of looks as a means to an end.

Op, :troll:


Anyone else notice this poster's ridic grammatical errors?

Take a chillpill, swallday6400.

yes. swallday makes grammatical errors in every single post. makes me wonder how that application got through.

qldman has some creepy agenda. he hates men who get married and seems to think women are vessels of sex. don't take this guy too seriously.

 

[swallday6400]

Lol this is a forum. Not the declaration of independence. However. starting now , I will stop making grammatical mistakes since it's distracting everyone from the real issues at hand........