Which is better?

[J ROD]

A long-term, loving relationship or a fluid situation with several participants that you work in around your schedule while being in a time demanding, professional program.

Let's get a pro and con list going........

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[J ROD]

I say keep everything liquid so you can touch it!!

 

[Velocity]

A long-term, loving relationship or a fluid situation with several participants that you work in around your schedule while being in a time demanding, professional program.

Let's get a pro and con list going........

A long-term, loving relationship is a time-demanding program.

I'll reveal my bias and admit that I'm married. No regrets about that - the wife and I have the same career goals and work to support each other. Having a demanding profession is OK with each of us because we're each going through the same thing.

I've occasionally wondered if the grass would be greener on the other side. I could see how it would be, but there are benefits to building a long-lasting relationship "early" (before/during medical school). Few good things in life come without a lot of hard work and dedication, and relationships are no different. If you just piddle around and put in little work or dedication, that's what you'll get back.

 

[WhtsThFrequency]

You mean as a way to look at relationships for the rest of your life?

It depends what your ultimate goal in life is, e.g. do you want a family or not.

Personally, I'd take a relationship over anything. I want partner in life and not just a series of people coming in and out of it. The entire dating scene takes so much damn effort and it's so superficial.

To use the old phrase...If I had to choose one, I prefer someone to come home to at the end of the day, not someone to go out with at the end of the day. You know?

 

[J ROD]

You mean as a way to look at relationships for the rest of your life?

It depends what your ultimate goal in life is, e.g. do you want a family or not.

Personally, I'd take a relationship over anything. I want partner in life and not just a series of people coming in and out of it. The entire dating scene takes so much damn effort and it's so superficial.

To use the old phrase...If I had to choose one, I prefer someone to come home to at the end of the day, not someone to go out with at the end of the day. You know?

see the OP.....just while I am in med school...residency.

 

[WhtsThFrequency]

I would think a relationship would provide you with support AND a good time, with random short-termers and/or hook-ups only giving you a good time, even if they are technically "easier" and don't require much of an emotional investment. It depends on how close of a supportive connection you want or need during your program. I don't think it is possible to make a true pro and con list, since someone's pro might be someone else's con.

 

[J ROD]

I would think a relationship would provide you with support AND a good time, with random short-termers and/or hook-ups only giving you a good time, even if they are technically "easier" and don't require much of an emotional investment. It depends on how close of a supportive connection you want or need during your program. I don't think it is possible to make a true pro and con list, since someone's pro might be someone else's con.

depends more on the girl. I usually need no support per se.

I have a really close and supportive fam.

I mainly need sex and some social. Usually there is too much social needs on her part for me. School and work take up most of my time.

 

[WhtsThFrequency]

depends more on the girl. I usually need no support per se.

I have a really close and supportive fam.

I mainly need sex and some social. Usually there is too much social needs on her part for me. School and work take up most of my time.

Yeah, see, that's the thing. Support can be really important, especially long-term support, unless you have it elsewhere. For some people, the support of an SO is a very needful thing in their lives when they don't have a close family or close group of friends. Lucky you for the fam And I agree....social needs of SOs can be annoying - BUT, it totally depends on the person. Most of my boyfriends over the years have been busy as well, and were totally cool with seeing me once a week. That was no big deal to them, or me. That's why it worked. For other people though, only being able to see someone once a week is a dealbreaker (especially most 20-something girls).

 

[J ROD]

Yeah, see, that's the thing. Support can be really important, especially long-term support, unless you have it elsewhere. For some people, the support of an SO is a very needful thing in their lives when they don't have a close family or close group of friends. Lucky you for the fam And I agree....social needs of SOs can be annoying - BUT, it totally depends on the person. Most of my boyfriends over the years have been busy as well, and were totally cool with seeing me once a week. That was no big deal to them, or me. That's why it worked. For other people though, only being able to see someone once a week is a dealbreaker (especially most 20-something girls).

Yeah, I would totally love a chica that would give me the space I need to make both our lives better. I can handle couple of times a week, but having nightly 2hr convos kills me. They are just never as busy as I am.

I think I am going to try to only stick to someone that has professional aspirations like a doc, dentist, pharm, RN, therapists, etc.

They should be busy enough to offset things. Another thing that kills me is that I live in the South but I am not a typical Southern.

 

[ChemMed]

Yeah, I would totally love a chica that would give me the space I need to make both our lives better. I can handle couple of times a week, but having nightly 2hr convos kills me. They are just never as busy as I am.

I think I am going to try to only stick to someone that has professional aspirations like a doc, dentist, pharm, RN, therapists, etc.

They should be busy enough to offset things. Another thing that kills me is that I live in the South but I am not a typical Southern.

I would choose the long term SO, but I'm with you on the timeline. I need someone who is okay with me not being there all the time. That can be hard. In the mean time I have needs that need filling on occasion.

I'm not sure what the typical Southerner is like really. I've never lived there. I'm from the West and lived in the Midwest but that's it. Could you enlighten me?

 

[J ROD]

I would choose the long term SO, but I'm with you on the timeline. I need someone who is okay with me not being there all the time. That can be hard. In the mean time I have needs that need filling on occasion.

I'm not sure what the typical Southerner is like really. I've never lived there. I'm from the West and lived in the Midwest but that's it. Could you enlighten me?

It is called the Bible belt......

 

[docelh]

...

 

[J ROD]

South = A lot of fat girls and not much else.

Don't want to bust your dream, but finding multiple women okay with a fluid situation is gonna be tough.

Dude, there are plenty of hot chicks here....

I was talking more about one now.....it runs its course and then another.

 

[VenusinFurs]

Fluids!