The 09/10 Couples Matching Support Group

[EM2BE]

Anyone else having a difficult time with one being offered many more interviews than the other at this point in the process? Hard to cancel interviews if there is a chance they can still get them.

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[DocCartman]

Anyone else having a difficult time with one being offered many more interviews than the other at this point in the process? Hard to cancel interviews if there is a chance they can still get them.

My wife has already got the "magic number" of interviews to match Gas, whereas I'm still chilling at 4 EM interviews. We were lucky in that we both are interviewing at Vandy on the same day- otherwise none of our interviews (except home program) are the same.

Since she's getting invites almost daily, and EM doesn't send out decisions for several more weeks, she's just scheduling every interview she gets and will cancel them as we know more. Programs expect that people will cancel interviews, so we're not sweating having to send the "thanks, but no thanks" email.

I would hold off on cancelling anything now (it's only 10/2 !), and wait until late Oct/early Nov to say yea or nay

 

[Muggie]

My fiance and I are couples matching and are applying to the same IM programs, with the hope that we will end up at the same place. We've applied broadly and have been offered interviews on the same day at 8 programs.

Today, I received an interview offer from a program but he did not get one. I would really like to schedule my interview with the hope that he will eventually get offered one there. However, if he doesn't get an interview I will likely cancel mine. But it's a great program that we'd love to interview at. Should I, in my email to schedule an interview, ask whether his application has been reviewed, and whether he would be getting an interview offer? Or should he contact the program himself?

What do you think?

 

[EM2BE]

My fiance and I are couples matching and are applying to the same IM programs, with the hope that we will end up at the same place. We've applied broadly and have been offered interviews on the same day at 8 programs.

Today, I received an interview offer from a program but he did not get one. I would really like to schedule my interview with the hope that he will eventually get offered one there. However, if he doesn't get an interview I will likely cancel mine. But it's a great program that we'd love to interview at. Should I, in my email to schedule an interview, ask whether his application has been reviewed, and whether he would be getting an interview offer? Or should he contact the program himself?

What do you think?

If I were in your situation, I would call the program and tell them you want to schedule your interview, but you want to wait to see if your SO gets an offer from them as well (and mention his name and that he is also interested in IM). It's amazing what can happen if they "know" someone that knows them. Of course, do this when he is around so if they have any questions for him, they can ask him. I've witnessed this type of thing working (someone knowing a person and dropping their name and giving some kind of compliment about their skills). Good luck with what you decide.

 

[MrBurns10]

Anyone else having a difficult time with one being offered many more interviews than the other at this point in the process? Hard to cancel interviews if there is a chance they can still get them.

Oh man, this is exactly the problem we're having. My husband has 16 anesthesia interviews already while I'm at only 2 radiology (and about 11 prelims that I haven't all scheduled). About a handful of the rads programs I've applied to have started inviting people, but the vast majority wait until at least mid-Oct, and many wait until after the dean's letter to even start sending invites (and rejections). We were just talking today how in just a few weeks he's going to have to start emailing programs that I haven't heard from to tell them he won't be able to interview until I find out if I'm getting one.

This is a complicated process...

 

[MrBurns10]

My fiance and I are couples matching and are applying to the same IM programs, with the hope that we will end up at the same place. We've applied broadly and have been offered interviews on the same day at 8 programs.

Today, I received an interview offer from a program but he did not get one. I would really like to schedule my interview with the hope that he will eventually get offered one there. However, if he doesn't get an interview I will likely cancel mine. But it's a great program that we'd love to interview at. Should I, in my email to schedule an interview, ask whether his application has been reviewed, and whether he would be getting an interview offer? Or should he contact the program himself?

What do you think?

You can do what EM2BE suggested or just get your fiance to email the program and say "hey, my wife got an interview, do you know when I'll know the status of my application?" or something like that. I've done that for a few programs and the PCs have been nice about it.

 

[Muggie]

Thanks for that info guys! We'll see whether it works.

 

[cmurda]

Anyone else having a difficult time with one being offered many more interviews than the other at this point in the process? Hard to cancel interviews if there is a chance they can still get them.

So I guess I'll add my name to this dubious list as well
1. I'm doing EM the fiance-to-be is going into path
2. thankfully we both want to stay in the southeast but she definitely wants to leave Louisiana and I'm actually fond of it, but it's all about compromises i guess

So far she's scheduled I think 14 interviews whereas I have a grand total of 5. now of course I'm hoping my numbers get up there in the upcoming weeks but I'm not completely freaking out just yet.

The whole couples matching process definitely adds another level of stress to the match but in the end it will all be worth it if we end up together.

Good luck to all and remember it's still a little early in the whole process so there is still hope for us yet.

 

[SeaBreeze12]

Anyone else having a difficult time with one being offered many more interviews than the other at this point in the process? Hard to cancel interviews if there is a chance they can still get them.

My BF and I are couples matching. I have heard back from 20/22 peds programs and he has heard back from 12/20 Internal med programs.
I have received invites from all 12 of the same programs he has. Three of the ones we have in common I have not scheduled an interview (not top picks), and I have scheduled 3 inteviews for places he has not heard from yet (top pick programs that I hope he gets as well ). So far we have 9 scheduled interviews at places that overlap.

What do other people think, is 9 programs in common a good number for a peds/ IM couples combo?

 

[Rogue Synapse]

I just want to say that both my fiancee and I are doing an away rotation this month at our top choice hospital, and having the best time! I love the neuro department here, and she fits right in with the family medicine crowd. We're finding it difficult to think about all the other programs we applied to now. Only through sheer willpower am I not canceling several of my other interviews.

 

[MrBurns10]

I just want to say that both my fiancee and I are doing an away rotation this month at our top choice hospital, and having the best time! I love the neuro department here, and she fits right in with the family medicine crowd. We're finding it difficult to think about all the other programs we applied to now. Only through sheer willpower am I not canceling several of my other interviews.

That's great! Make sure you guys leave no doubt in their minds that you want to be there. I'm sure it'll help a ton.

 

[EM2BE]

I just want to say that both my fiancee and I are doing an away rotation this month at our top choice hospital, and having the best time! I love the neuro department here, and she fits right in with the family medicine crowd. We're finding it difficult to think about all the other programs we applied to now. Only through sheer willpower am I not canceling several of my other interviews.

Completely understand. We've found a town where we'd be happy and both have done rotations and both have interviews...matter of securing. And yes, difficult to schedule new ones and not to cancel scheduled ones.

 

[EM2BE]

Update - my SO is going to try to pre-match. Would make both our lives easier. (SO has been through the match once - doesn't want to take chances if possible to avoid.)

 

[MrBurns10]

Any updates guys? How is everything going?

Things are going decently here. My husband and I have 11 mutual PGY-2 interviews (at the same programs), so things are going a little better than I could have hoped at this point. I'm really hoping I get more invites after Nov 1 because we'd really like to interview at close to 20 programs to maximize our chances of matching. It's also hard because I haven't heard anything from several programs that have already sent out invites...I wish they'd just go ahead and reject me if that's what they're going to do eventually! Also, coordinating travel has proven incredibly difficult. But that's okay.

Good luck, everyone!

 

[SeaBreeze12]

Any updates guys? How is everything going?

Things are going decently here. My husband and I have 11 mutual PGY-2 interviews (at the same programs), so things are going a little better than I could have hoped at this point. I'm really hoping I get more invites after Nov 1 because we'd really like to interview at close to 20 programs to maximize our chances of matching. It's also hard because I haven't heard anything from several programs that have already sent out invites...I wish they'd just go ahead and reject me if that's what they're going to do eventually! Also, coordinating travel has proven incredibly difficult. But that's okay.

Good luck, everyone!

Sounds pretty similar. We have 10 programs that overlap. And we are both waiting on 2-3 really important programs that have already sent out invites . Very frustrating. We have only been able to coordinate ONE interview on the same date.. oh well.

 

[Rogue Synapse]

Hey guys. Well, we're into the meat of the interview season. So far, we've had terrible luck in coordinating our interviews together. We both happened to snag Denver together this week, so we finally get to save a little money. Not much, because you still need two plane tickets, but it's still so nice to have the other around for moral support and post-interview reflections. Things are so bad financially that we're going on an 11-hour drive to a city next week where we both have interviews in lieu of flying. My car sips gas so we should be good as far as gas money, and they are covering our hotel. I will just have to pretend that I'm making $60 an hour driving to get me through the long drive, because that's about how much I'll be saving.

How's everybody else holding up?

 

[Rogue Synapse]

Can someone move this thread to the "ERAS and NRMP match" subforum under General Residency Issues in the residents' forums?