Have you met with admission staff at the EA/Ed schools? Have they gone over your application and given you the go ahead to apply EA?
I know that your experience when your dad died was most likely the worst thing that has happened to you, your mom and your family. This situation is always tough, no matter when it happens. If you should compare it to another experience on a med school application I really don’t know. The experience with your dad was so personal and when it involves family members every “bad” thing that resulted is magnified by a lot. You probably can’t even separate the stuff that happened logically and without hugely personal bias . Everything that happened was bad because your dad was the patient. I have no idea what the second experience you plan to use is, but it sounds like you were strictly an observer to an ER event with no deeply personal feelings for anyone involved. You can be logical and think why didn’t this happen to me and my mom when my dad was so sick. And that might be okay but the two situations are vastly different with the biggest differences being the emotional aspect, followed by your age at the time, understanding of hospital protocol in these situations, the suddenness , concern about your parents etc..
It sounds like you might have good clinical exposure. Maybe something else would be a better fit. I’m not understanding why this horrible experience brought you to medicine. It might have driven others away.
Good luck as you move forward.