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- Jan 9, 2017
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I am a fourth-year medical student who recently decided to pursue radiology rather than ortho. I made this decision primarily due to lifestyle concerns. While ortho is still the field that interests me most, I think it would be very hard on my wife and kids. In my personal circumstances, I think I would be selfish to pursue it. (I am just a guy who feels a lot of guilt when I don’t maximize family time. I don’t pass judgement on how anyone else chooses to spend their time. I know there are a lot of wonderful parents in demanding careers.)
I was always interested in surgery and I knew I wanted to do Ortho after a few days on the rotation. I loved the operations, the technical aspects, the relative lack of garbage consults and babysitting. I even enjoyed taking overnight call. For the first time, I didn’t hate spending some time in the ED. I think I got a pretty realistic experience: q4 call +/- post-call day. I averaged 80 hrs/week over the 4 weeks; the first week was 101 hours. I was tired but I enjoyed it. I still had some time to spend with my family too, though not as much I would have liked. My wife carried almost every home responsibility during this time. This made me feel guilty, though she never complained. We knew ortho demanded some rough years in residency, but we were confident we would get through it.
Doubts started to creep in as I made preparations for 4th year. I have a 3-year-old son and my wife is due with our second baby in the next couple months. I felt pretty crappy leaving them to do an away rotation. This prompted me to rethink everything. Why would I voluntarily leave my pregnant wife for a job? Why would I completely cede control of my schedule for the next 6 years? Why would I choose a field that generally requires frequent call? Aren’t all of those things antagonistic to what I value most? Isn’t my family my number one priority?
After weeks of indecision. I decided on rads primarily because it would be more family friendly during residency and it offers great vacation time as an attending. My wife did not pressure me into this. She has been extremely supportive. The pressure to prioritize family is 100% internal).
To be clear, I think rads is interesting. Throughout med school I always had rads in the back of my mind. During medicine, I would browse through patients’ imaging and try to find pathologies. With Ortho, I found that I really enjoyed looking at pelvic fractures and trying to make a read. This led me to believe that I would be happy in radiology. Some aspects of rads didn’t interest me (ex. neuro), but I thought that as I began to learn more about it, I would begin to enjoy it more. I hope so.
The only problem is that I am also interested in the next step. In evaluating pelvic fractures, I always considered what I would do next; I never just moved on to the next image. I am not sure I would be satisfied only identifying the problem, but not solving it. I love working with my hands, not just my mind. I’m not sure I can see myself sitting in front of a computer all day.
Since I decided on radiology, I have totally redone my 4th year schedule. Frankly during this time, I have been bummed out. It’s not an easy thing to give up on the vision you had for yourself. I always I identified with Alexander Hamilton’s refrain, “ I am not throwing away my shot.” Now, just like Hamilton did, I threw it away.
I dropped all of the ortho rotations I had scheduled and worry that I may have burned bridges. I suppose I could sign-up again, but I think word will get around. Nobody wants the ortho applicant who can’t even make up his mind if he wants ortho.
I could throw together an application. If I don’t match at least I don’t have to live my life knowing that I didn’t even try. The only thing that holds me back from doing that is that the lifestyle issues haven’t changed at all. My family still is and always will be my number one priority. My wife is still pregnant. My son still cries every time I go to the hospital. I still don’t want to leave for aways with a newborn at home.
I guess my biggest hope is that I can be happy in radiology. I really do hope that; but I am not sure if it is true. I know my family would like me to have better hours, but not if I comes at the expense of my happiness.
I hope that the more I learn the more I enjoy it. If I do it, I want to be a freaking good radiologist. Nobody wants a crappy radiologist who is only there because he heard it was easy. I know it’s not.
So, does rads get more enjoyable as you go along? Is it a mistake to do your second favorite specialty for the sake of lifestyle?
I was always interested in surgery and I knew I wanted to do Ortho after a few days on the rotation. I loved the operations, the technical aspects, the relative lack of garbage consults and babysitting. I even enjoyed taking overnight call. For the first time, I didn’t hate spending some time in the ED. I think I got a pretty realistic experience: q4 call +/- post-call day. I averaged 80 hrs/week over the 4 weeks; the first week was 101 hours. I was tired but I enjoyed it. I still had some time to spend with my family too, though not as much I would have liked. My wife carried almost every home responsibility during this time. This made me feel guilty, though she never complained. We knew ortho demanded some rough years in residency, but we were confident we would get through it.
Doubts started to creep in as I made preparations for 4th year. I have a 3-year-old son and my wife is due with our second baby in the next couple months. I felt pretty crappy leaving them to do an away rotation. This prompted me to rethink everything. Why would I voluntarily leave my pregnant wife for a job? Why would I completely cede control of my schedule for the next 6 years? Why would I choose a field that generally requires frequent call? Aren’t all of those things antagonistic to what I value most? Isn’t my family my number one priority?
After weeks of indecision. I decided on rads primarily because it would be more family friendly during residency and it offers great vacation time as an attending. My wife did not pressure me into this. She has been extremely supportive. The pressure to prioritize family is 100% internal).
To be clear, I think rads is interesting. Throughout med school I always had rads in the back of my mind. During medicine, I would browse through patients’ imaging and try to find pathologies. With Ortho, I found that I really enjoyed looking at pelvic fractures and trying to make a read. This led me to believe that I would be happy in radiology. Some aspects of rads didn’t interest me (ex. neuro), but I thought that as I began to learn more about it, I would begin to enjoy it more. I hope so.
The only problem is that I am also interested in the next step. In evaluating pelvic fractures, I always considered what I would do next; I never just moved on to the next image. I am not sure I would be satisfied only identifying the problem, but not solving it. I love working with my hands, not just my mind. I’m not sure I can see myself sitting in front of a computer all day.
Since I decided on radiology, I have totally redone my 4th year schedule. Frankly during this time, I have been bummed out. It’s not an easy thing to give up on the vision you had for yourself. I always I identified with Alexander Hamilton’s refrain, “ I am not throwing away my shot.” Now, just like Hamilton did, I threw it away.
I dropped all of the ortho rotations I had scheduled and worry that I may have burned bridges. I suppose I could sign-up again, but I think word will get around. Nobody wants the ortho applicant who can’t even make up his mind if he wants ortho.
I could throw together an application. If I don’t match at least I don’t have to live my life knowing that I didn’t even try. The only thing that holds me back from doing that is that the lifestyle issues haven’t changed at all. My family still is and always will be my number one priority. My wife is still pregnant. My son still cries every time I go to the hospital. I still don’t want to leave for aways with a newborn at home.
I guess my biggest hope is that I can be happy in radiology. I really do hope that; but I am not sure if it is true. I know my family would like me to have better hours, but not if I comes at the expense of my happiness.
I hope that the more I learn the more I enjoy it. If I do it, I want to be a freaking good radiologist. Nobody wants a crappy radiologist who is only there because he heard it was easy. I know it’s not.
So, does rads get more enjoyable as you go along? Is it a mistake to do your second favorite specialty for the sake of lifestyle?