Men, any hookups with female attendings?

This forum made possible through the generous support of SDN members, donors, and sponsors. Thank you.
M

mtDNA

Senior Member
15+ Year Member
Joined
Jun 1, 2005
Messages
263
Reaction score
1
Just wondering if any of you guys have had any success in hooking up with and/or dating a female attending. If so, how did you pull it off? Where did it lead?

Also, are there any policies that outline consequences for this? or is it fairgame?

Thanks!
Members don't see this ad.
 
mtDNA said:
Just wondering if any of you guys have had any success in hooking up with and/or dating a female attending. If so, how did you pull it off? Where did it lead?

Also, are there any policies that outline consequences for this? or is it fairgame?

Thanks!
Click to expand...

Sounds like you're really trying to live up to that avatar picture :laugh:
 
mtDNA said:
Just wondering if any of you guys have had any success in hooking up with and/or dating a female attending. If so, how did you pull it off? Where did it lead?

Also, are there any policies that outline consequences for this? or is it fairgame?

Thanks!
Click to expand...

I thought of some bad ideas. Jumping off a bridge, shooting yourself in the foot, etc. But I think your bad idea takes the cake. There may be no probs if it goes good but if it goes sour your life will get ugly quick. Nothing worse than a vengeful woman with loads of power over you. The saying "Hell hath no fury..." exists for a reason.
 
Members don't see this ad :)
Chuckwalla said:
I thought of some bad ideas. Jumping off a bridge, shooting yourself in the foot, etc. But I think your bad idea takes the cake. There may be no probs if it goes good but if it goes sour your life will get ugly quick. Nothing worse than a vengeful woman with loads of power over you. The saying "Hell hath no fury..." exists for a reason.
Click to expand...

hahaha! no kidding. if you thinking dating someone within your own class can be risky, i can't even imagine what the fallout with an attending could lead to. i mean, its awkward enough to see an attending in the hallway whose seen me screw up in front of them on the wards . . . but man, if they actually saw me screw THEM before . . . i say, in a high pitched voice: awwwwwwkwerrrrrd

thankfully, all my female attendings so far have more often resembled frankenstein than anything remotely attractive. residents, however, are another story . . . can't say anything at this point
 
The only decent attending I've seen is also, like, 8 months pregnant.


Also, all of the attractive residents I've seen are married/engaged... the trio of hot girl/doctor/single doesn't go together too often.
 
domer621 said:
The only decent attending I've seen is also, like, 8 months pregnant.


Also, all of the attractive residents I've seen are married/engaged... the trio of hot girl/doctor/single doesn't go together too often.
Click to expand...

well, I dont think she HAS to be single to hook-up. ALthough I will say I do know some single female attendings at my school who are surgeons. I mean, they are not super hot or anything like that, but think about it, how cool would it be to be hooking up, or in a relationship with one of them? they could take you to expensive meals and they probably have a sweet house, which would fun to hang out at/sleep at.

This kind of thing happens all the time with male attendings and female med students (I was actually talking to an attending who had done this at the last research conference I attended!). I figure there must be some cases where it happens the other way around.

And think about...if she just likes you as a friend with benefits, she would probably be willing to write you a killer recommendation!
 
mtDNA said:
well, I dont think she HAS to be single to hook-up. ALthough I will say I do know some single female attendings at my school who are surgeons. I mean, they are not super hot or anything like that, but think about it, how cool would it be to be hooking up, or in a relationship with one of them? they could take you to expensive meals and they probably have a sweet house, which would fun to hang out at/sleep at.

This kind of thing happens all the time with male attendings and female med students (I was actually talking to an attending who had done this at the last research conference I attended!). I figure there must be some cases where it happens the other way around.

And think about...if she just likes you as a friend with benefits, she would probably be willing to write you a killer recommendation!
Click to expand...

Wow....Just Wow...
 
SOUNDMAN said:
Wow....Just Wow...
Click to expand...

hah, this is cool, we are both on at the same time.

seriously though, anybody have experience, or even anybody know somebody who does and can share the story?
 
mtDNA said:
well, I dont think she HAS to be single to hook-up. ALthough I will say I do know some single female attendings at my school who are surgeons. I mean, they are not super hot or anything like that, but think about it, how cool would it be to be hooking up, or in a relationship with one of them? they could take you to expensive meals and they probably have a sweet house, which would fun to hang out at/sleep at.

This kind of thing happens all the time with male attendings and female med students (I was actually talking to an attending who had done this at the last research conference I attended!). I figure there must be some cases where it happens the other way around.

And think about...if she just likes you as a friend with benefits, she would probably be willing to write you a killer recommendation!
Click to expand...

well said, and since you put it that way, i see the benefits and plausability . . . go for it
 
I knew a male attending who did this who used to be in charge of the OB/GYN department, and it cost him his job and his marriage. To risky sounding to me! Just my 2 cents :)
 
I'll take "The most ****ing stupid thing you could possibly do" for $1000, Alex.
 
mtDNA said:
well, I dont think she HAS to be single to hook-up. ALthough I will say I do know some single female attendings at my school who are surgeons. I mean, they are not super hot or anything like that, but think about it, how cool would it be to be hooking up, or in a relationship with one of them? they could take you to expensive meals and they probably have a sweet house, which would fun to hang out at/sleep at.

This kind of thing happens all the time with male attendings and female med students (I was actually talking to an attending who had done this at the last research conference I attended!). I figure there must be some cases where it happens the other way around.

And think about...if she just likes you as a friend with benefits, she would probably be willing to write you a killer recommendation!
Click to expand...

GAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA.... AMAZING OMFGWTF

PLEASE do this... and then update us on the aftermath. :eek::laugh::lol:
 
Members don't see this ad :)
mtDNA said:
well, I dont think she HAS to be single to hook-up. ALthough I will say I do know some single female attendings at my school who are surgeons. I mean, they are not super hot or anything like that, but think about it, how cool would it be to be hooking up, or in a relationship with one of them? they could take you to expensive meals and they probably have a sweet house, which would fun to hang out at/sleep at.
Click to expand...

Hell yeah, I agree. I'm just saying I haven't seen any yet. But yeah, a girl who's a 4-5 can move up to a 7 or maybe even an 8 if she's a surgeon. :thumbup:
 
domer621 said:
Hell yeah, I agree. I'm just saying I haven't seen any yet. But yeah, a girl who's a 4-5 can move up to a 7 or maybe even an 8 if she's a surgeon. :thumbup:
Click to expand...

Indeed.

So I am thinking of a word to describe how it would feel to pull this off, and only one comes to mind: "glorious".

Think about this: what if she was a dermatologist, and I matched derm simply by hooking up with an attending at that program?

Or what if she was a surgeon and I hooked up with her during a rotation. She might say something to effect of: "you need to be rewarded, go ahead and take a week off. Oh yeah, and you can go ahead and chill at my place this week and use my jacuzzi". So then, what I would do is wake up around 2:00 pm everyday that week, get me some barbeque wings, go into the jacuzzi while eating them, and call my friends during this, while they are doing their surgery rotation and tell them that "I am sitting in Dr so and so's hottub eating barbeque wings and I am not working at all and by the way how is work? been sleeping latley?"
 
mtDNA said:
Also, are there any policies that outline consequences for this? or is it fairgame?
Click to expand...

Pretty much all hospitals have rules against this, because it can potentially open the hospital up to a big harrassment lawsuit. But it is generally the attending/resident who faces bigger consequences than the med student.
 
Not true either, I used to work with a bartender (guy) who got kicked out of med school for just those kind of shannagin's...
 
Funny thread.... but I think the OP can turn off Grey's Anatomy and go back to studying his General Biology and Calculus freshman homework now.

Life's not a TV show. By the time you get to professional school, you've worked too hard to play games like this. If you are a college kid working at a restaurant or grocery store and want to date your boss or make out with her at a party, go for it. The stakes are a tad bit higher in medicine, though. It's not a bright idea.

Law2Doc said:
Pretty much all hospitals have rules against this, because it can potentially open the hospital up to a big harrassment lawsuit. But it is generally the attending/resident who faces bigger consequences than the med student.
Click to expand...
I agree with the guy who said this is not true at all^. The low person on the totem pole almost always takes the brunt of the punishment because the institution has too much invested in the doc.

At the hospital I worked at in undergrad, the chief resident and a LPN got walked in on during a "special procedure" in the Nuc Med room after hours. She was fired the next week, and I have no idea what happened to him... probably a slap on the wrist or a minor incident write-up in his file. That's hearsay from the fired nurses's sister who worked in my department, but I have no reason not to believe her and I never did see her sister working at the hospital again.

So, you see, the moral of the story is to stick with hooking up with nurses since there's less risk and they're hotter anyways :D
(j/k... that's not very professional either)
 
Guys hooking up with female attendings? Boring.

Chicks hooking up with female attendings? Now we're talking!
 
Feli said:
Funny thread.... but I think the OP can turn off Grey's Anatomy and go back to studying his General Biology and Calculus freshman homework now.

Life's not a TV show. By the time you get to professional school, you've worked too hard to play games like this. If you are a college kid working at a restaurant or grocery store and want to date your boss or make out with her at a party, go for it. The stakes are a tad bit higher in medicine, though. It's not a bright idea.

I agree with the guy who said this is not true at all^. The low person on the totem pole almost always takes the brunt of the punishment because the institution has too much invested in the doc.

At the hospital I worked at in undergrad, the chief resident and a LPN got walked in on during a "special procedure" in the Nuc Med room after hours. She was fired the next week, and I have no idea what happened to him... probably a slap on the wrist or a minor incident write-up in his file. That's hearsay from the fired nurses's sister who worked in my department, but I have no reason not to believe her and I never did see her sister working at the hospital again.

So, you see, the moral of the story is to stick with hooking up with nurses since there's less risk and they're hotter anyways :D
(j/k... that's not very professional either)
Click to expand...


Wait, nurses are hot?
 
TexasTriathlete said:
I know many exceptionally hot nurses.
Click to expand...

Now they're "exceptionally" hot???!!

I've either had blinders on for some time now, or these "hot" nurses run and hide the second I step through the doors. There's a strong possibility it's the latter, but that's neither here or there.
 
Feli said:
Funny thread.... but I think the OP can turn off Grey's Anatomy and go back to studying his General Biology and Calculus freshman homework now.
Click to expand...

Im sorry, your right, stuff like this never happens in reality it is only on TV. My mistake. And as much as I would like to study those fine materials, I am currently a bit tied up with my M2 courses. But don't worry, if my grandpa needs his toenails clipped, I will be sure to send him to you ;)
 
mtDNA said:
Im sorry, your right, stuff like this never happens in reality it is only on TV. My mistake. And as much as I would like to study those fine materials, I am currently a bit tied up with my M2 courses. But don't worry, if my grandpa needs his toenails clipped, I will be sure to send him to you ;)
Click to expand...

oh SNAP!! a little harsh in the sweet spot, but Feli had to see that coming.

its is ironic how serious a podiatry student takes themself, considering how quickly med school lets such med-student-tendencies evaporate right about mid-second year. and it only gets worse . . .

and for the record:

1) greys anatomy sucks
2) crazier things have happened than med students hooking up with attendings. can't say i've ever seen it, but it wouldn't knock my socks off if i did
3) i wonder what a podiatrist would say about the feet on HALf of my patients in internal medicine . . . ::::::shivers::::::
 
I don't think anyone is doubting that it could happen. I'm sure it does. But it would be the most ****ing stupid thing you could possibly do, with the potential consequences far outweighing the potential benefits.

I would imagine that drilling your attending is much more likely to get you in trouble than get you a leg up (no pun intended) on a residency spot.

Something else to consider: what if you're bad? That is, this female attending is probably going to be older and more experienced than you, and she will have had much better than some 25-year-old medical student whose whose only recent contact with a vagina was one that had a baby coming out of it.

Here's how that scenario would go down:

1. You suck
2. Attending tries to blow you off, realizing that she would rather masturbate
3. You are now so intent on this conquest that you become a pain-in-the-ass pseudo-stalker
4. You fail the clerkship, or get extremely low marks for being "unprofessional"
5. In extreme cases, you may get booted or arrested, depending on how far you take it.
 
mtDNA said:
Indeed.

So I am thinking of a word to describe how it would feel to pull this off, and only one comes to mind: "glorious".

Think about this: what if she was a dermatologist, and I matched derm simply by hooking up with an attending at that program?

Or what if she was a surgeon and I hooked up with her during a rotation. She might say something to effect of: "you need to be rewarded, go ahead and take a week off. Oh yeah, and you can go ahead and chill at my place this week and use my jacuzzi". So then, what I would do is wake up around 2:00 pm everyday that week, get me some barbeque wings, go into the jacuzzi while eating them, and call my friends during this, while they are doing their surgery rotation and tell them that "I am sitting in Dr so and so's hottub eating barbeque wings and I am not working at all and by the way how is work? been sleeping latley?"
Click to expand...


I know that I'm just a dumb pre-med, but I just wanted you to know that you are an inspiration to all of us, and I can only hope to one day be as professional, and as good of a person as you are!!
Keep up the good work.
 
TexasTriathlete said:
Something else to consider: what if you're bad? That is, this female attending is probably going to be older and more experienced than you, and she will have had much better than some 25-year-old medical student whose whose only recent contact with a vagina was one that had a baby coming out of it.
Click to expand...

C'mon bro, be optimistic. What if it's been years since she's had "relations"??? Then it wouldn't matter if you're a Dirk Diggler or a Jack Black in bed!
 
I'd stay away ESPECIALLY if it was a female surgeon. Anecdotal, but the few female surgical residents I've met were ball-busters... I would not want to be on the receiving end of their personal vendetta.

But I agree, please go ahead and let us know what happens! [grabs the popcorn]
 
TexasTriathlete said:
Something else to consider: what if you're bad? That is, this female attending is probably going to be older and more experienced than you, and she will have had much better than some 25-year-old medical student whose whose only recent contact with a vagina was one that had a baby coming out of it.
Click to expand...

The fallacy in this argument is that you imagine that these female attendings are getting action. The only action they're probably getting involves battery-powered devices. How many students here know hot-looking female attendings?
 
kamehame said:
The fallacy in this argument is that you imagine that these female attendings are getting action. The only action they're probably getting involves battery-powered devices. How many students here know hot-looking female attendings?
Click to expand...

I can think of two. Plus a couple residents.

And Dr. Cox, of course. ;)
 
kamehame said:
Word has it that her right hand has developed an essential tremor. :D
Click to expand...

Nothing a little beta blocker can't help! ;) What is with these stereotypes of women surgeons being ugly and sexually deprived?

Ok, anyway. I HAVE been hit on by med students when I was a resident and fellow. Always when they were off service and no, I never took any of them up on the offer because I had an SO and wasn't interested.

I'm still trying to get hospital privileges and on insurance policies, so don't have any stories to tell about being an attending and med students but time will tell as I am now single and who knows. But for those of you here, please wait until you are off service...no one is getting a week off to relax because of any relationship with me.

Hasn't anyone here worked for a relative? If anything, they have higher expectations for you. Believe me, if I know you, when I lecture, I'm calling on you rather than making life easier for you.

Suffice it to say, even if I was game, you ain't gonna be sitting in my hottub eating wings while I'm working. :smuggrin:
 
Look at this thread... it's so hot right now.
 
Kimberli Cox said:
Nothing a little beta blocker can't help! ;) What is with these stereotypes of women surgeons being ugly and sexually deprived?

Ok, anyway. I HAVE been hit on by med students when I was a resident and fellow. Always when they were off service and no, I never took any of them up on the offer because I had an SO and wasn't interested.

I'm still trying to get hospital privileges and on insurance policies, so don't have any stories to tell about being an attending and med students but time will tell as I am now single and who knows. But for those of you here, please wait until you are off service...no one is getting a week off to relax because of any relationship with me.

Hasn't anyone here worked for a relative? If anything, they have higher expectations for you. Believe me, if I know you, when I lecture, I'm calling on you rather than making life easier for you.

Suffice it to say, even if I was game, you ain't gonna be sitting in my hottub eating wings while I'm working. :smuggrin:
Click to expand...

This is exactly the kind of reasonable response that I have been looking for. It sounds like you would be open to this scenario, which I am glad to hear, although I am a little dissapointed that you woulnd't let me stay home and eat BBQ wings in the hottub.

BTW, I don't think that this objection about being bad in bed holds much water. I have not been with a ton of women or anything, but I have had sex enough times and with enough women to know that I am good at it. I know every man in the world says that he is good at it, but I will tell you what, every girl I have every been with has called me back a month or more later (even after I told her I didn't want a relationship) asking if we can "hang out".
 
mtDNA said:
This is exactly the kind of reasonable response that I have been looking for. It sounds like you would be open to this scenario, which I am glad to hear,
Click to expand...

Just because I am open to the scenario doesn't mean that I am with you personally.:smuggrin:

... although I am a little dissapointed that you woulnd't let me stay home and eat BBQ wings in the hottub.
Click to expand...

First, I hate BBQ wings. So messy. Secondly, if you aren't in school, you gotta get a job, even if you are independently wealthy.

BTW, I don't think that this objection about being bad in bed holds much water. I have not been with a ton of women or anything, but I have had sex enough times and with enough women to know that I am good at it. I know every man in the world says that he is good at it, but I will tell you what, every girl I have every been with has called me back a month or more later (even after I told her I didn't want a relationship) asking if we can "hang out".
Click to expand...


They were trying to change your mind. Pretty much most men say they don't want a relationship, even if they do. And women are wonderful at assuming that they're "different" that they can "change him" if they really try. Look at all the mistresses that are suprised when their new husband pulls the same tricks on them.

Then again, who knows...maybe you're a Ron Jeremy.
 
I have definitely seen a fair share of quality young female attendings. Unfortunately for you all I doubt they are single, but peds, psych, and surprisingly orthopedic surgeons (only seen residents though -- future investment I suppose) are pretty good from what I have seen.

The doctor-nurse thing is pretty common I'd wager, due to the amount of marriages I have seen between the two. Plus, nurses = WOOF.

I will agree with the general sentiment, even if you could land a hot, single attending, its likely not going to be a good idea. Just because you can doesn't mean you should!
 
kamehame said:
Yeah, it's tough for her to wash those plates clean, so that is why you should be more considerate.
Click to expand...

What kind of jerk do you take me for? I would never think of having her do that after a hard days work. I am far more considerate than that. I will use her credit card to hire a maid:cool:
 
Ummm....guys, you DO realize that y'all sound like a bunch of 14 year old boys, don't you?
 
I used to "date" an IM attending 12 years my senior, but I guess it doesn't really count since I was in college. Looking back on the situation however, I realize a few of things.
1. She was really, really busy and our relationship consisted of late night meet ups at her place. (seemed normal at the time) I don't think we had one conversation of any depth, and I think she thought I was a *****.
2. She was a nice person, but I also think she was just trying to antagonize her ex-fiancee (a surgeon at the same university hospital who had apparently cheated on her with a scrub nurse) by sleeping with the middle linebacker on the college football team.
3. As smart as medical doctors are, some are just as crazy. What a woman.:love:
4. No way would I do that on a rotation.
 
Chemdocx said:
our relationship consisted of late night meet ups at her place. (seemed normal at the time) I don't think we had one conversation of any depth
Click to expand...

That's a perfect! :thumbup:
 
mtDNA said:
Im sorry, your right, stuff like this never happens in reality it is only on TV. My mistake. And as much as I would like to study those fine materials, I am currently a bit tied up with my M2 courses. But don't worry, if my grandpa needs his toenails clipped, I will be sure to send him to you ;)
Click to expand...

Ooooo look at the big ol M2! my oh my! An M2??? now THATS impressive! :rolleyes:
 
I had the opportunity with one of my medical school preceptors (instructor in an ACGME program). A bit younger than me (I am old). She was married, now recently divorced. pretty hot. Once when my wife and her husband were out of town she had me over and cooked me dinner. Nothing happened, but she was fairly straightforward about what could. I have an email saved on an account my wife (I hope) has no access to - in which she says I would probably be good at least for a one time. I keep it just for the ego strokes. We communicate very infrequently now.
 
Feli said:
I agree with the guy who said this is not true at all^. The low person on the totem pole almost always takes the brunt of the punishment because the institution has too much invested in the doc.
Click to expand...

That isn't the case most of the time actually -- you may know one or two anecdotal "hearsay" cases but assuming arguendo they are true, these folks could have reversed the situation with better representation. Superiors (attendings) who take advantage of their position in this way are walking liabilities. While one lawsuit might not eliminate all the value the institution has invested in such person, the repeated patterns of such walking liabilities tend to make it cheaper to lose them like a bad cold. Hospitals have large legal teams who work day and night to keep hospitals out of legal hot water, and the best legal advice when this kind of situation happens is almost always to dump the attending. The med student who is discharged will sue, and will often win giving his tenuous career position, the inequality of positions, and given the current sexual harrassment lawsuit environment. Which is why all hospitals have handbooks which frown upon such relationships. This gives hospitals a built in basis on which to dismiss the attending -- ie for breaking the rules.
Don't buy into Grey's Anatomy. This is but one more "fake" thing about the show.
 
mtDNA said:
Just wondering if any of you guys have had any success in hooking up with and/or dating a female attending. If so, how did you pull it off? Where did it lead?

Also, are there any policies that outline consequences for this? or is it fairgame?

Thanks!
Click to expand...

Excuse please, but what is hooking up? It is good?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

N
Attendance and Professionalism on Rotations
Replies
8
Views
4K
Redpancreas
Redpancreas
M
21 year old female with borderline polycythemia & elevated iron - next step?
Replies
21
Views
4K
tantacles
tantacles
I
Tips and Tricks we've been told by attendings
Replies
3
Views
3K
calivianya
calivianya
O
Asked for a LOR, attending said of course and to just tell him what i want it to say. What do
Replies
8
Views
3K
Acapedia
A
M
Abdominal pain in a 20 year old female, what could this case be?
Replies
17
Views
4K
Seb345
S
Top