Medical School Haikus!

[velouria]

OK, these are lame. I'm sure you guys can do better...

On MCATs
Studied hard for months
For one long test, one long day
Writing section = hell

On LOR's
You don't know me, but
Could you write some fluff for me?
Make it sound real good.

On Applying
What, another fee?
Let me write another check.
Oops, ran out of ink.

On Rejection
Thought you got in, huh?
Who do you think you're kidding?
No med school for you!

On SDN
Way too much free time
Boring job and internet?
Not a good combo!

---

Members don't see this ad.

 

[greenie8]

Velouria,
These are hilarious.
I like the MCAT one the best.

With those Haiku writing skills, what med school wouldn't want you?

 

[spumoni620]

On waiting

One hand on the phone.
The other clings to a mouse.
Baylor, where are you?

 

[DW]

i have to study
we have a cell bio exam
this f*cking sux

 

[spumoni620]

Another one on waiting:

Is that a phone ring?
Nay--perhaps a new e-mail?
Bleh. My beeping watch.

 

[jlee9531]

Originally posted by spumoni620
On waiting

One hand on the phone.
The other clings to a mouse.
Baylor, where are you?

ahh touches the souls of all of us...

 

[Street Philosopher]

alphanumerics
i hate you more than ever
die mcb die

 

[GoodMonkey]

frustrated SP
does not like the integrins
no cell adhesion


pick a cytokine
and SP had cursed its name
(if he recalls it)


poor little I-CAM
no love from SP today
cells no longer stick


there's a cofactor
which one? SP does not know
they all sound the same


quick! what's B7?
your T cell is anergic
no response today.

 

[missmod]

missing four classes
two hundred bucks for a flight
you better take me!

 

[Street Philosopher]

i don't understand
immunology guru
talks over my head

 

[TexasRose]

My husband has this one to offer for me. I'm not feeling too poetic.


Texas schools make their
Match day February one.
Hard to wait that long.

But one school beckons.
Indian summer adcom
Policy of hope...

Alas! Baylor dean
Still hasn't called me today
Bbbrrrring! False alarm. ****.

Please let autumn give
Winter the slip so we go
Straight to f***ing spring

 

[velouria]

That's hilarious!

Here's another one on waiting:

E-mail invites soon
Me, obsessive-compulsive?
Nah. (Refresh. Refresh!)

 

[velouria]

Hey spumoni,

Just saw your other post.
Here's on more for you!!!

Oh my god! You're in!!!
Congratulations! You rock!
Way to f'in go!!!



OK, I'm officially done now.

 

[GoodMonkey]

Originally posted by Street Philosopher
i don't understand
immunology guru
talks over my head

you will understand.
thromboxane will be your friend,
at least by monday.


you can doooooo eeeeeeeet! don't let the alphanumerics getcha down! i have faith!

ps velouria that refresh! refresh! one was great!

 

[OB1🤙]

Netter plates to learn.
Homer J just too funny,
Back to the TV.

 

[Street Philosopher]

anatomy sux!
though we dissect back and chest,
test is out of ass!

 

[h2cooper]

SDN makes me
the one with lower grade point
feel like I will fail

 

[h2cooper]

No phone calls today
October 15 is gone
Guess I'll post a verse

 

[Street Philosopher]

another pink blob
obvious differences?
looks the same to me...

EM is stupid
touch one part of elephant
like blind scientists

random guessing sucks
guess in the blank even worse
thank god for pass/fail.

 

[OB1🤙]

Branchial arches
And pharyngeal pouches.
Stupid Embryo!

"Obviously spleen,"
Professor tells us. No way!
Histo slides the worst.

"Disarticulate
Atlanto-occiptal
Joint." Cut head off?? Yikes!

Look like physician
With white coat and stethoscope.
Don't feel like it yet!

 

[PianoGirl04]

"Hold for interview"
What kind of BS is that?
More waiting for me.

 

[Brickhouse]

On MCAT

O! Merciless test!
at least my test score was not
the same as my age.

 

[enigmata]

Oh U. C. S. F.
Send me secondary love!
Make this cutie's day!

 

[Nanon]

My poor GSI
Attacked by swarming premeds
Hungry for one point.

 

[Northerner]

Damn you, S D N.
Addicted to your forums
and coffee to boot.

 

[Bridaddy]

GPA is bad
Why aren't my parents rich?
No Harvard for me!

 

[Samoa]

Originally posted by Street Philosopher
anatomy sux!
though we dissect back and chest,
test is out of ass!

Almost snarfed my drink
When I read this. Too true.
But Block II is worse.

 

[Horseradish99]

Here are some haikus I wrote while I was procrastinating studying for my pelvis exam... and then I saw this thread! I love haiku

Puborectalis,
muscle sling for my anus.
Keeps me from diapers.


Ejaculation...
thank you internal spinchter,
for stopping the pee!

 

[tygrwds]

True story:

Coffee with breakfast.
Dad drove me to the MCAT
site. Long wait ahead.

Random students gave
Kaplan snack bags, full of stuff
I don't like eating.

Chemistry section
has trick questions - holy ****!
I gotta go pee!

I will never drink
coffee before another
test again. No way.

I could've finished
that section. And then, that damn
verbal kicked my A$$!

 

[enigmata]

slept none, drank coffee
now i cant sleep OR focus
state of limbo bites

 

[Catalyst]

Going to med school
Thinking about a new hell
What was I thinking?

 

[Street Philosopher]

i sit here tonight
having accomplished nothing
there goes my day off

 

[Northerner]

Day off? Lucky you.
SDN is not a waste.
Your post count is great.

 

[jlee9531]

two hundred fifty
twenty times less than SP
better post some more

 

[Street Philosopher]

study partner(s) done,
you guys are depressing me.
must study some more.

 

[Northerner]

Street Philosopher,
His dedication is great
No comparison.

 

[Rendar5]

haru ga saki
ikadaigaku ni
hairitai

 

[Northerner]

No fair, Rendar5!
Our haikus are terrible,
Yours must be as well.

 

[jbing]

Rejections in droves
But my stats are pretty good
Will it end? Doubt it.

 

[Rendar5]

but of course it is
however no one can tell
when it's Japanese

 

[jbing]

.

 

[jlee9531]

my friend just read that
she said that it made no sense
just kidding, show off

 

[jbing]

Interview Invites
To schools in real cold places
Quite often turned down

 

[Northerner]

"Regret to inform?"
I regret to be informed,
Your loss, you bozo.

 

[OB1🤙]

One more week of tests
Then mass brain cell destruction.
Mmmm, Newcastle Brown...

 

[jlee9531]

On edge...that we are,
Acting in ways we would regret...
Ahh, welcome Christmas...

 

[Samoa]

Night before Gross test--
Guy I liked just blew me off
What crappy timing.

Not that I hadn't
figured it out already
without being told.

His e-mail was vague,
written exactly as I
would have written it.

All about himself
and no blame for me at all
though my choice was why.

I'll think about it
later. Just call me Scarlett
O'Hara, MD.

 

[redstar18]

sorry samoa
e-mail rejections are lame.
good luck on your test!

 

[Rendar5]

Here is one idea:
Anyone up for renga?
This is how it goes:

Someone writes 5-7-5
another does 7-7

Either order works
as long as one finishes
the other's last verse

 

[gizzdogg]

Mentor, could you write
Recommendation letter
For a needy soul?

Sweet lad, why so shy?
My utmost respect you have
Deadline two months? Swell!

Sir, three months have passed
Have you been so kind to write?
Life in your hands now!

Ahh, my failing mind!
I fail lad once, not again
One more month I need

Hey man, deadline nears
you have my respect, have i yours?
Write soon, else I fail

Annoying student
Why pester my busy soul?
Promise I must break!

Fool, write now you must
Your sweet Scruffy I kidnapped
Write or your bitch dies!