"Let me keep this brief..."

[F0nzie]

"I don't want to take up too much of your time..."

"Long story short..."

"Let me just say one last thing..."

It's never short, it takes up too much of my time, and it's never the last thing. So why say that?

I'm not necessarily referring to patients but people in general. Has anybody else noticed this or do I just need to chill out?

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[sunlioness]

"With all due respect . . ."


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[F0nzie]

"With all due respect . . ."


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Arghh!!!

 

[MacDonaldTriad]

“I’m just saying….” (So please ignore any perceived content in the dribble coming out of my mouth as any semblance of a rational argument would be completely serendipitous.)

 

[deleted343839]

It's never short, it takes up too much of my time, and it's never the last thing. So why say that?

Because it is incredibly effective for the person saying it.

My favorite version of this is the audience member monologue at the mic after a conference talk. "I have two questions and one comment..."

 

[daru1]

"I don't want this to sound racist..."

 

[gotname]

"No offense but..."

 

[wolfvgang22]

Shaka, bro.

 

[FlowRate]

"I don't want to take up too much of your time..."

My own projection on this one is that this phrase is not always "I've been talking for an hour and want to talk for another hour." When those words come out of my mouth, it's often "I know you want this visit to last 5 minutes, but I'd really like to ask a question." Maybe better phrased as "I know you're busy, but I'd like some of your time."

 

[birchswing]

This is why I wish I were studying linguistics. These things fascinate me. I know there must be a term for this, but I can't find it. I've only studied the basics of linguistics, but I know there is a field called conversation analysis that probably covers this area.

I think of these types of phrases as buffering a sentiment based on reading social cues. There's probably some more precise term for that. What I find really interesting is how people who learn English as a second language are taught these social cues. You notice some of them when you speak to customer service agents from other countries.

"As it turns out" is a fascinating one to me. It's one of the official phrases I was supposed to use when I worked for Apple's customer service to explain something a customer didn't want to hear. "As it turns out, the repair depot found water damage in the phone, so the ways we can proceed are . . . " They have a whole list of phrases to avoid and ones to use instead.

My cousins learned English in school in Sweden, and they learned some rather inane phrases for the purpose of polite conversation. Like I remember in grade school my cousin learned to ask, "How's the weather?" with the reply, "Can't complain."

If you want a hilarious look at the inane use of language watch W1A on Netflix--it's great. It's sort of like a British version of 30 Rock--it follows executives at the BBC headquarters. Sort of a satire of corporate jargon and practices.

 

[NontradCA]

"I'm not saying she's a gold digger."

 

[Ceke2002]

I'm not sure if it's the phrases themselves (some of them at least), or the fact that people aren't using them correctly.

 

[Ceke2002]

"Long story short..."

Oh hai, I have the perfect accompaniment for this....

 

[gotname]

"Briefly..."
(And it never ends. Same with a last minute "By the way...")

"I can't speak for _____ but..."

"I didn't see what happened/I wasn't there but my friend's cousin's sister's best friend's wife said..."
(cue Shakespeare type game of telephone monologue)

"Do you have a minute?"
(NOOOOOOO! I don't have an hour, I have to go buy a pet and walk it. Go away!)

 

[WalterDonnie]

"you smell bad"

 

[heartsink]

"Hey, I'm the wrong person to ask. I don't actually know the man, I've heard his name mentioned in passing. I don't know, you'd have to know the particulars. I think what you're saying..."

 

[Shikima]

I love how 15 minute session turns in 45 minutes..... le sigh.

 

[toskabab]

Sittin here singing to the tune of "Let me clear my throat..."

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[birchswing]

I love how 15 minute session turns in 45 minutes..... le sigh.

Med sessions?

My psychiatrist's secretary has a beeper go off after what seems like only 5 minutes, practically sounds like a foghorn. I don't even know where it is. There's some very loud beeping thing. I think maybe they do it once to let her know when it's been 10 minutes, and then they keep doing it over and over to let her know she has to stop I keep trying to talk, but the sound is distracting. When we get to the part where the beeping is incessant, the psychiatrist stands up, opens the door, walks into the back office usually mumbling to her assistant that she has a headache, and . . . the appointment's over. The next patient is called back and waits in the office making it impossible for me to ask any other questions as she comes back from the back office and back into the room (impossible in that once another patient is called back --well there's a sense of propriety). It's all a very crowded space--I have to keep standing right by the door to check out with the secretary.

Anyhow, all that was to say: 15 becomes 45? How? You must have an office without foghorns.

 

[Shikima]

Med sessions?

My psychiatrist's secretary has a beeper go off after what seems like only 5 minutes, practically sounds like a foghorn. I don't even know where it is. There's some very loud beeping thing. I think maybe they do it once to let her know when it's been 10 minutes, and then they keep doing it over and over to let her know she has to stop I keep trying to talk, but the sound is distracting. When we get to the part where the beeping is incessant, the psychiatrist stands up, opens the door, walks into the back office usually mumbling to her assistant that she has a headache, and . . . the appointment's over. The next patient is called back and waits in the office making it impossible for me to ask any other questions as she comes back from the back office and back into the room (impossible in that once another patient is called back --well there's a sense of propriety). It's all a very crowded space--I have to keep standing right by the door to check out with the secretary.

Anyhow, all that was to say: 15 becomes 45? How? You must have an office without foghorns.

I do.

But the worst is, he thinks we have all the time in the world to talk about each little detail and obsess over treatment. Doesn't help that his therapist is a dolt.

 

[birchswing]

I do.

But the worst is, he thinks we have all the time in the world to talk about each little detail and obsess over treatment. Doesn't help that his therapist is a dolt.

Hmm... You're either less pushy than my psychiatrist or I'm less pushy than your patient. And by pushy I guess I mean the willingness to ignore politeness for self interest.

 

[Shikima]

Hmm... You're either less pushy than my psychiatrist or I'm less pushy than your patient. And by pushy I guess I mean the willingness to ignore politeness for self interest.

Initially was pretty subtle and gentle. I started to get more and more concrete with him and setting limits. He didn't catch on. I had to get pretty rude and I didn't like this.

 

[MacDonaldTriad]

I always wanted to install a button that plays the final jeopardy jingle. When ever anyone gets too circumstantial; "OK you have 30 seconds to make your point. Da Da Da dada Da Da Daaaa." It could work well in treatment planning meetings when staff doesn't understand pertinent positives and negatives as well.

 

[shan564]

"I know you're busy, but..."