I dropped out of medical school, undergrad, professional school and now I am ??

[bipolardoc]

I dropped out of medical school, undergrad, professional school and now I am a.. (Any stories or personal experiences) Both insipiration and sad stories are appreciated. If you kept up with my posts so far I am the sad story type, dropped out due to an illness, took life harder on myself due to the illness and how it took years out of my life and to be honest made me bitter and angry and just drew me into a bigger depression. Especially because I cant pay for the proper healthcare and my health is draining down...
Anyone drop out of undergrad, law school, med school, dental school, etc... and have inspirational come backs or downfalls, any stories are appreciated.

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[Krisss17]

Hi Bipolardoc,

Sorry about your struggles. The only thing I can suggest is to move on, concentrate on today and let go of yesterday. As long as you hold on to your past, you will not be able to move forward. You did get into medical school, so maybe there is something that you can offer to people trying to apply.

I don't claim to understand what you are going through...but I do wish you the best.

 

[bipolardoc]

Hi Bipolardoc,

Sorry about your struggles. The only thing I can suggest is to move on, concentrate on today and let go of yesterday. As long as you hold on to your past, you will not be able to move forward. You did get into medical school, so maybe there is something that you can offer to people trying to apply.

I don't claim to understand what you are going through...but I do wish you the best.

your so true, its hard to let go of what still consumes your life, but thanks so much for the kind words...

 

[dec0y]

Keep your chin up, pick up a book, and make a phone call to the adcoms of where you would like to apply.

If there is a chance that you can get in, and this is truly what would make you happy in life, then you will do what it takes to get back onto that track--and that is all you can do.

If not, I suggest you make peace with it, move on, and find something that makes you happy.

What you CANNOT do is resolve yourself to the fact that "aww, nobody will accept me because of x y z" without finding out definitively. If you do this, you will look back on your decisions every time you have a bad day at work. Trust me. If you give everything every day towards your goals, then you should be able to sleep well at night, regardless of the outcome.

Work on that self confidence as well. You got in once, which is more than what 95% of the people on this board can say. You should be giving us advice!

 

[bipolardoc]

Keep your chin up, pick up a book, and make a phone call to the adcoms of where you would like to apply.

If there is a chance that you can get in, and this is truly what would make you happy in life, then you will do what it takes to get back onto that track--and that is all you can do.

If not, I suggest you make peace with it, move on, and find something that makes you happy.

What you CANNOT do is resolve yourself to the fact that "aww, nobody will accept me because of x y z" without finding out definitively. If you do this, you will look back on your decisions every time you have a bad day at work. Trust me. If you give everything every day towards your goals, then you should be able to sleep well at night, regardless of the outcome.

Work on that self confidence as well. You got in once, which is more than what 95% of the people on this board can say. You should be giving us advice!

Thanks guys for the nice comments but the initial intent of the thread was to see if people had similar stories or people who went through this as well. For getting back to my school, SGU, I am sure I can because I left on good terms after only 2 weeks of school. But I dont think its an option to go there because they dont have good docs down there for my treatment and would feel safer (less anxious) to attend somewhere if I can.

Thanks.

 

[MaximusD]

Thanks guys for the nice comments but the initial intent of the thread was to see if people had similar stories or people who went through this as well. For getting back to my school, SGU, I am sure I can because I left on good terms after only 2 weeks of school. But I dont think its an option to go there because they dont have good docs down there for my treatment and would feel safer (less anxious) to attend somewhere if I can.

Thanks.

If you dont mind me asking, is your disorder under control or do you feel an episode had a large part to do with you leaving when you did? Your story is unfortunate, and I hope you figure out a way to make what you're looking for happen.

 

[bipolardoc]

If you dont mind me asking, is your disorder under control or do you feel an episode had a large part to do with you leaving when you did? Your story is unfortunate, and I hope you figure out a way to make what you're looking for happen.

I think I may always had anxiety, but I guess you can say it never crippled me and I suppressed it quite well... yet came out in a huge huge 3 day series of panic attacks etc... that I never experienced before or dealt with before, left to live with my brother since I had no where to go and sold all my stuff to travel for school. Brother and family pretty much ****ted on me, old school "foriegners" dont believe in pysch **** and screwed me up more saying its all in my head etc... The enviornment I was in screwed me up, made me dip in more and more, not having money or ability to work to get help tumbled me more, not having the correct meds, and having the first pyschiatrist I trusted and opened up to get charged with sexual exploitation of a female patient didnt help either, then people in denial and angry at the illness and what it did to me and the new found depression it developed in me sucked, and having this all rob 6+ years out of my life just messed me up in the head more and just made me get into a warp of depression/anxiety, hard to explain, but trust me it REALLY SUCKS.

 

[dec0y]

Thanks guys for the nice comments but the initial intent of the thread was to see if people had similar stories or people who went through this as well. For getting back to my school, SGU, I am sure I can because I left on good terms after only 2 weeks of school. But I dont think its an option to go there because they dont have good docs down there for my treatment and would feel safer (less anxious) to attend somewhere if I can.

Thanks.

I understand what the intent of the thread was. It is nice to know if someone else has gone through the same thing as you and persevered. However: Does it really matter if someone else has done it? You are the one who ultimately has to start down that path. Don't let someone's failure or success determine yours.

Is your disorder under control? Does it require constant attention? Will you be able to fulfill the role of a physician in a few years? These are all serious questions that you need to ask yourself.

 

[flip26]

I think I may always had anxiety, but I guess you can say it never crippled me and I suppressed it quite well... yet came out in a huge huge 3 day series of panic attacks etc... that I never experienced before or dealt with before, left to live with my brother since I had no where to go and sold all my stuff to travel for school. Brother and family pretty much ****ted on me, old school "foriegners" dont believe in pysch **** and screwed me up more saying its all in my head etc... The enviornment I was in screwed me up, made me dip in more and more, not having money or ability to work to get help tumbled me more, not having the correct meds, and having the first pyschiatrist I trusted and opened up to get charged with sexual exploitation of a female patient didnt help either, then people in denial and angry at the illness and what it did to me and the new found depression it developed in me sucked, and having this all rob 6+ years out of my life just messed me up in the head more and just made me get into a warp of depression/anxiety, hard to explain, but trust me it REALLY SUCKS.

This thread should be closed...

OP: whatever you need is not going to be found here. Get professional help.

 

[silas2642]

This thread should be closed...

OP: whatever you need is not going to be found here. Get professional help.

Wow, it's that kind of compassion that is going to make you a fantastic physician with a cracker jack bedside manner, flip.

To the OP:

I think I see what you're looking for. A lot of things have happened in your life that you probably wish you could undo. There are some black marks on your record that are going to make you look somewhat unappealing to admissions committees-- you withdrew from med school at SGU, you dropped out of undergraduate school, etc. However, you have to keep in mind that you have way more on your plate than the vast majority of us.

You have a couple of questions that you really need to ask yourself before you keep on journeying down this road-- why medicine, and can I still do this and be happy and healthy?

The why medicine question is probably bigger for you than most of us. Is it because you want to help the mentally ill due to your experience with bipolar, is it a subconscious/conscious attempt to "cure" yourself, do you feel you have to prove yourself in some way? It's a huge question, and I think that you have to have the REAL answer and not some bullcrap answer like most applicants do ("I want to help people") so that you will have some moral compass to guide you.

The other big question is, can you be happy doing this? What is going to make you happy and stable in life? Because it probably isn't going to be medicine. If anything, med school, residency, and your career is going to add an aspect of instability to your disease and so you need to have a serious discussion(s) with a psychiatrist that you respect and trust as to whether or not a career in medicine is going to be possible with the severity of your disease. Ultimately the decision is yours of course, but a good physician can help guide your decision.

 

[flip26]

Wow, it's that kind of compassion that is going to make you a fantastic physician with a cracker jack bedside manner, flip.

To the OP:

I think I see what you're looking for. A lot of things have happened in your life that you probably wish you could undo. There are some black marks on your record that are going to make you look somewhat unappealing to admissions committees-- you withdrew from med school at SGU, you dropped out of undergraduate school, etc. However, you have to keep in mind that you have way more on your plate than the vast majority of us.

You have a couple of questions that you really need to ask yourself before you keep on journeying down this road-- why medicine, and can I still do this and be happy and healthy?

The why medicine question is probably bigger for you than most of us. Is it because you want to help the mentally ill due to your experience with bipolar, is it a subconscious/conscious attempt to "cure" yourself, do you feel you have to prove yourself in some way? It's a huge question, and I think that you have to have the REAL answer and not some bullcrap answer like most applicants do ("I want to help people") so that you will have some moral compass to guide you.

The other big question is, can you be happy doing this? What is going to make you happy and stable in life? Because it probably isn't going to be medicine. If anything, med school, residency, and your career is going to add an aspect of instability to your disease and so you need to have a serious discussion(s) with a psychiatrist that you respect and trust as to whether or not a career in medicine is going to be possible with the severity of your disease. Ultimately the decision is yours of course, but a good physician can help guide your decision.

It took you until the end of 4 paragraphs to say what I said in one sentence. Does the added verbiage make your message more compassionate? How, exactly?

The OP seems to be extremely troubled, and I don't think that an internet forum is the best place for him/her to be looking for the answer.

 

[silas2642]

It took you until the end of 4 paragraphs to say what I said in one sentence. Does the added verbiage make your message more compassionate? How, exactly?

The OP seems to be extremely troubled, and I don't think that an internet forum is the best place for him/her to be looking for the answer.

Well, yes. Sometimes compassion isn't so much what you say but how you say it. When you say something that indicates that you at least kind of understand where someone is coming from, that's compassion and empathy as opposed to, "this thread should be closed because you're really messed up."

 

[flip26]

Well, yes. Sometimes compassion isn't so much what you say but how you say it. When you say something that indicates that you at least kind of understand where someone is coming from, that's compassion and empathy as opposed to, "this thread should be closed because you're really messed up."

Umm, that is not what I wrote, so do not use "quote" marks, bub.

The thread should be closed, because now all of you pseudo doctors are prescribing what the OP should do.

A pre-med internet forum is no place for someone to get medical advice and psychological counseling from people who are not qualified, no matter how well intentioned and "compassionate" they think they are...the only appropriate response to the OP is to get some professional help...

 

[silas2642]

Umm, that is not what I wrote, so do not use "quote" marks, bub.

The thread should be closed, because now all of you pseudo doctors are prescribing what the OP should do.

A pre-med internet forum is no place for someone to get medical advice and psychological counseling from people who are not qualified, no matter how well intentioned and "compassionate" they think they are...the only appropriate response to the OP is to get some professional help...

Sorry for not quoting you directly and paraphrasing you instead while using quotation marks.

No one has given medical advice. No one has said, "use x medication. Have you tried y medication? Do z therapy." No one is prescribing anything. It is an anonymous internet forum where pre-meds, med students, and physicans can come, vent and get support. As far as I can tell, no one has violated any of the rules, and so there is no reason why the thread should be closed. The op was merely looking for social and moral support.

 

[QofQuimica]

Folks, please do not hijack the thread. The OP has asked for personal stories by med students and other health students with chronic illnesses. S/he is not asking for medical advice and in fact has asked that you *not* give advice pertaining to his/her own situation.

OP, to be honest, I don't think you are going to get much of a response. Particularly if the illness is not widely known about by someone's classmates or colleagues, I suspect that most people with chronic health problems will not wish to discuss their personal health issues on SDN. Have you read the blog by Emily, who is a medical student with bipolar disorder? You may find it interesting. She also wrote an article for SDN.

 

[bipolardoc]

Folks, please do not hijack the thread. The OP has asked for personal stories by med students and other health students with chronic illnesses. S/he is not asking for medical advice and in fact has asked that you *not* give advice pertaining to his/her own situation.

OP, to be honest, I don't think you are going to get much of a response. Particularly if the illness is not widely known about by someone's classmates or colleagues, I suspect that most people with chronic health problems will not wish to discuss their personal health issues on SDN. Have you read the blog by Emily, who is a medical student with bipolar disorder? You may find it interesting. She also wrote an article for SDN.

Thank You!!!, you had it said it perfectly

Folks, please do not hijack the thread. The OP has asked for personal stories by med students and other health students with chronic illnesses. S/he is not asking for medical advice and in fact has asked that you *not* give advice pertaining to his/her own situation.

 

[StanfordDropout]

"...And who ever you are, I've always depended on the kindness of strangers." - from famous play/adaptation you all know by name.

The OP is in a similar pit hole. I, for one, cannot relate but I hope anyone with experience would respond to him. I had a humanities professor while I was in a tutorial at Brasenose,Oxford. He asked, "why do we read?" I didn't know the answer, and he replied, " to know that we're not alone." I think this is the reason the OP started this thread in the first place. If you can't first be human, I doubt you'll made a good physician.

This thread should be closed...

OP: whatever you need is not going to be found here. Get professional help.

 

[ChairmanMao]

Have you read this speech by Steve Jobs?

(http://www.snopes.com/glurge/stevejobs.asp)

It's a really poignant and touching story about how he dropped out of college, was homeless for awhile, collected bottles and cans for the deposit, and later went on to find Apple Computers. He was in a similar situation as you were when he was in his 20s but he really pursued his passion and didn't dwell on his failures. It's the kind of mindset and attitude that came through after he hit rock bottom. Granted, not everyone who fails in life can rebound and succeed like Steve Jobs, but I can think of at least half-a-dozen people who've failed out of school, pursued their passion, and rebounded in their life. You just need to find what your passion is and work towards it.