How far away did you go from family for med school and any regrets?

[madamemichaelscott]

How far away did you go from family for med school and do you regret it? Looking back, how valuable would you say having a support system nearby is? Or is it overrated bc you have no time in med school to really be with family anyways?

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[Dral]

I was a 3 or 4 hour drive away. No regrets. It depends more on how independent you are. I'm a relatively independent person. I probably could have moved half way around the globe and it wouldn't have mattered to me.

If you're asking this question to begin with, I might assume you're someone who may be better off being closer to your family.

 

[DarkBluMage]

How far away did you go from family for med school and do you regret it? Looking back, how valuable would you say having a support system nearby is? Or is it overrated bc you have no time in med school to really be with family anyways?

Support system is a must. My family is one direct flight away. I fly home at least once a month or every other month. I’m also flying home for bdays, celebrations, etc if at all possible. My family also calls me regularly. My mental health was in a poor state before I started doing that. Med school is hard, make sure you’re not too far from people you love if you have options.

 

[m1redsox]

Very personal question to which you’ll get a wide variety of answers. I’m from CA and did med school on the east coast and was very happy with my experience. I went with the best offer I had (best school, lower COL area), and I don’t regret it for a moment. Other people in my class turned down bigger name schools so that they could stay closer to home and were very happy they did that. I think you just need to base it on how often you feel like you need to see family to be happy. In my case, I am completely happy just seeing my family 2-3 times/year. I could’ve gone home more often, but when you’re far away you have to decide how much of your limited vacation you will spend on family. Obviously if you go to school near family, you don’t really have to make that decision.

 

[Hollow Knight]

Honestly, you're not going to get to spend a ton of time with them either way because you'll be working crazy hours until you're an M4.

I'm INCREDIBLY family-oriented. But I can't just not go be a doctor to be close to family, you know what I mean?

But if you're picking between two similarly priced schools, and one is within an hour or two of family, yeah go for that one for the few weekends you can spare a drive over

as far as regrets: sometimes I'm like "Man, I could have spent so much more time with my wife and brothers and parents if I had just gone and been a nurse/engineer." But that's balanced by me appreciating that I LOVE going to clinic everyday as an M3- how many people can say they love their job? And I will have the best job security ever. My family will never have to worry about rent or groceries (grew up working class). And as an attending in a rural area, I'll be taking care of people who wouldn't be getting medical care otherwise.

But this is why docs want to be respected/paid well- the sacrifice of time from family during training is real.

 

[SurfingDoctor]

Does 2812.1 miles count as far?

 

[LucidSplash]

This is very individualized and depends on the person and their family. I didn’t live anywhere close to family and this was optimal for me, as my family is more of a stressor than a support. YMMV.

 

[JuicedToTheSocks]

Kinda nice to have fam a few hrs away if u live in a big east coast city. And society is pretty degenerate now

 

[darkeon]

from northeast to pr. no regrets. i had lived independently and worked another full time career prior but i still contact my family and sig other everyday

 

[Shunsui]

1.5 hours away. Was my #1 deciding factor for choosing a school. Since the first 1.5-2 years are basically asynchronous with some mandatory stuff sprinkled in there I spent a lot of time at home with my SO. It's convenient in third year (at least so far) since I can just go home on weekends whenever I want if I'm bored rather than having to book a flight for when I get a holiday or extended break (aka basically never)

 

[teamrocketjessie]

This is very individualized and depends on the person and their family. I didn’t live anywhere close to family and this was optimal for me, as my family is more of a stressor than a support. YMMV.

I agree. I sometimes envy people with the family support but I’m truly in this alone. Thank goodness for great friends. I visit my parents maybe once a year.

 

[Lifeblood_20]

Moved 4-5 hours away (by car) from family, happy with the distance. See my parents like 5 times per year. I lived at home for college and really wanted independence at this stage in my life.

 

[mistafab]

I turned 18, moved out, and lived my life on my own terms ever since.

No regrets. Ever.

Home is where YOU live.