I do believe that family comes first, but also believe the right education and the right residency program have the potential to greatly benefit your family in the long run. I'm not sure I would encourage you to seek a program based on more family friendly hours.
I made the business sacrifice to make all my son's soccer games up until he played at a division 1 college (too far to travel at that point) and to make all my daughter's swim meets, and other athletic and academic events. As a result, I sacrificed significant income to watch my kids grow up. It was a conscious decision.
Now that my kids are older, I actually work more hours and I'm making up for taking off the necessary hours in the past. So there are two schools of thought. My friend worked his ass off for many years while his kids were growing up, including weekends. He missed EVERY one of his kids activities, but now has enough money to buy each one of his adult children a nice home.
On the other hand, I didn't want my kids to always be the kid who's dad was never around. Try telling a young kid that you were busy making money for their future. They don't give a crap. They just want to see your face at the game. So now I'm working hard and I'm not in the financial situation to buy my kids big homes yet. But as a result of being there for them and raising them correctly, they will be able to buy their own homes AND remember that I attended all their events. It's great that we can still talk about games/meets as if they were yesterday. Kids only grow up once, and I wasn't going to miss that for any amount of money.
However, I'm not sure you should sacrifice your education. There can be a balance. Obtain the best residency possible and you'll still be able to spend plenty of time with your kids.
But for what it's with, I also agree that many VA programs have better hours. That will also be true of many programs based out of smaller community hospitals that aren't associated with multiple locations.
I speak with many students and residents on a regular basis, and have heard from more than one student that there is a program outside of Philadelphia named Roxborough Hospital that has pretty good hours. I know little if anything about the program or director, though students did speak highly of the program.