Thanks for all the input! Going back to the dawing board.
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Failure essay... but unsure if it counts
I would definitely pick a different topic. One with more of a personal failure than anything else. When you write something like that, you seem like you want to blame others even if that isn’t your intention and the implications could be that someone interprets you as not understanding the importance of diversity and representation. Pick something based on your actions or skills alone and then elaborate on how you improved yourself because of it.
Not passing/pretending as the other culture!! Diversity is (typically) valued in our school, and intermixing is actually quite common on our campus. We have lots of cultural interest performance groups, like Bhangra, K-pop, Hula that accept members who were not born into Indian, Korean, Hawaiian cultures.I'm trying to be intentionally vague about the specific activity, but I don't think Rachel Dolezal situation is the same.
Based on my actual writing and ECs, I don't think the overall message would be so grossly misinterpreted, since diversity and inclusion is part of my application's central theme. However, I see what you are saying though about it seeming like I'm blaming others and that is definitely something I'd like to avoid. Thanks!
Based on my actual writing and ECs, I don't think the overall message would be so grossly misinterpreted, since diversity and inclusion is part of my application's central theme. However, I see what you are saying though about it seeming like I'm blaming others and that is definitely something I'd like to avoid. Thanks!
You should pick a topic where you failed based on your own shortcomings/mistakes. It shows honesty and introspection.
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Nobody is born perfect; we often fail, (hopefully) self-reflect and (also hopefully) learn to be better people. This is what physicians/medical students need to have experience in and this is why medical schools ask us about this. They do not want a student who cannot handle or acknowledge their failure. Therefore, an essay where you failed because of your own actions is best, and particularly one where you GREW as a person. Your essay doesn’t really illustrate this and I personaly would not recommend using it..
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You could still potentially use this topic as your failure essay, but (as others have noted) you should totally omit the part in which you’re attributing the failure to something external, rather than yourself.
Instead, maybe you could describe how your failure to be elected/chosen to the leadership position— and the hurt/disappointment that accompanied it— helped shape your participation in the club going forward. Perhaps it helped you understand that you could be a useful, influential member of that group/team without having an official leadership position (and maybe describe the ways in which you influenced including others and increasing diversity)? Or perhaps you could describe how the failure helped put into perspective how much you truly enjoyed being a part of the cultural interest group, and how, even after not achieving that goal, it was a pleasure to continue learning and growing from the experiences within the club, regardless of your role?
I feel that event really helped me in terms of personal growth, which is why it came to mind. BUT I completely agree with the failure due to my own actions would illustrate the growth even further. Thanks for clarifying the purpose of the prompt.
While I'm personally leaning more towards picking a topic with my own shortcomings, this was incredibly helpful in terms of what aspects of my growth I should and could highlight. Thank you!
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So of all the challenges you've faced up to this point your biggest failure was not being elected an officer of a cultural interest club in college? Ultimately, it really doesn't matter if you feel you grew in that instance because you're essay is competing against essays from people who overcame adversities like cancer, poverty, family tragedies, addiction. Maybe if your essay was taken in a vacuum you could pull it off but for people who read lots of this stuff your "adversity" is pretty insignificant. Also why people writing about not getting an A in "insert college class here" as your biggest failure is just plain dumb.
Um alright then. I just want to say that my question was specifically asking about the "failure" essay because I struggled with it this past cycle much more than my "challenge" essay. Which happens to be on a topic you've touched on. And I would not consider any of the examples you've listed as failures except for maybe addiction (but still I'd be hesitant to label it as such). In this particular case of my failure essay, I would have focused more on facing the hurt of discrimination from peers, developing my resilience and empathy, ultimately so that could help my club become more understanding and inclusive.
I am not sure why my post was that offensive, but I just feel that there was a misunderstanding. I hope that cleared some up, and hope you have a wonderful day.
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A ton of people failed the first high stakes biochem exam at my medical school. Coming off that failure they just couldn't say, "whelp. I'll try harder! No netflix no videogames no gym I'm gonna power through day and night!" Those who recovered really had to admit their study strategy was bad, ask for help, and change. I had to reapply to medical school multiple times. That is, I believe, what adversity essays are getting at. Its how you cope with failure and bounce back. The year I got into med school after reapplying was the year I realized this and wrote my essays accordingly.
I know this is a stressful time of year. Its good you've got your head in improving your essays now rather than in May. My application essays made me cringe too if it helps.
-But the way you come off in the essay isn't great. At a minimum it doesn't really showed you want to do anything. Its "I failed and was sad. And something about privilege and inclusion because that is the zeitgeist." It doesn't show that you really changed or considered the perspective the students in the club.
-I'm going to preface this by saying I don't know anything about you or the club. And I know this might come off as hurtful. But you really need to be careful when writing about stuff like this, especially in the current political climate. This reads like "they didn't let me be head of the korean club because i'm white!!! so i taught them all how to not be racist" and that does not come off as very sympathetic to anyone on either side of the political spectrum.
I know this is a stressful time of year. Its good you've got your head in improving your essays now rather than in May. My application essays made me cringe too if it helps.
-But the way you come off in the essay isn't great. At a minimum it doesn't really showed you want to do anything. Its "I failed and was sad. And something about privilege and inclusion because that is the zeitgeist." It doesn't show that you really changed or considered the perspective the students in the club.
-I'm going to preface this by saying I don't know anything about you or the club. And I know this might come off as hurtful. But you really need to be careful when writing about stuff like this, especially in the current political climate. This reads like "they didn't let me be head of the korean club because i'm white!!! so i taught them all how to not be racist" and that does not come off as very sympathetic to anyone on either side of the political spectrum.
I happen to be Korean, so I find it interesting that people latched on to that particular example. But anyways, thank you. The brutal honesty and the opportunity to hear people's reasoning is exactly why I wanted to ask for advice here. My original essay for the "personal failure" is so cringeworthy and poorly reflected, but I feel that the topic itself and the growth is more appropriate and less contentious. I may try reworking my original first before considering other failure topics. Thanks again.
