That's It...I have remorse now

[DocTAP87]

Hey, so I've posted a couple of posts about struggling my first year in PT school. It's been miserable. I'm 29 years old, two kids, and a ton of debt and it's only getting worse. Now I'm in PT school, my dream come true that has become a nightmare.

I have no time for my family, I can't get better than a C on any of my kinesiology exams and I'm just squeaking by in anatomy. I'm even seeing a psychologist now because I'm so stressed out and my anxiety and irritability is getting out of hand.

The semester is almost over and I can't wait. I even told my friend that if they do kick me out because I get a C- in kinesiology, I'll feel some relief. I was learning web development and computer programming before getting accepted and I loved that. I hate this.

I told this to some people and I hear "it gets better after this semester." So if I survive this semester, I sure hope it does. I like the career, I've wanted to be a therapist for a long time, and I worked as a tech for 8 years but this semester is crushing me.

Anyways...maybe I just needed to rant to anyone that might respond. I feel like it's just me. I'm the only one struggling (I know that's not true but it feels that way). I'm tired of having anxiety on my way to class, snapping at my family because I'm trying to study, and feeling like an idiot who just doesn't get it.

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[Azimuthal]

Hey man, what helped me was setting a schedule and evolving my study habits. In kinesiology and biomechanics, it was just finding their relationships. The same for gross anatomy. As for family, set 1 day a week for them. PM me if you need to rant some more. I can help.

 

[starrsgirl]

You can do this! You need to pull all your resources for these last few weeks. Sit your family down and tell them you basically are going to be "gone" for a few weeks. They can pretend like you are on a trip. Call babysitters, get some family in, do whatever you need to ensure you have coverage for your kiddos. If you have a partner, send him/her out with some friends so they can get a night off too. You need to relocate yourself away from the house so you can focus on studying. It was very difficult for me to be IN the house because I remembered and saw all I was missing. We found it was better for everyone if the kids understood I was gone a day, and my husband knew not to expect me. We had the last day of the semester in sight so we just held on until then. If this takes you 12 hour days, it's worth it. Just survive this semester. It is was harder to clean up a mess of not passing.

Even if you are contemplating another career, now is not the time to do it. Finish this semester with passing across the board. Please take my advice that old failing grades come back to haunt. Finish on top. Then you can take some time over winter break and evaluate everything calmly....not in a time of stress.

 

[DocTAP87]

Thank you for the nice replies. I made this thread in the middle of a breakdown and felt guilty about it the next day. I feel much better today and I'm in the library studying now. It really helps to get it out sometimes. I worked hard in undergrad to get accepted and when I got accepted, I had this thought in my head that it was going to be this super supportive environment but instead I'm being followed with this constant thought of being dismissed at any moment. It was like, "prove that you're good enough to get in and then prove that you're good enough to stay."

I met with my kines prof and she helped me figure out what I'm doing wrong. I'm not going into enough detail so I've really been hammering away at the finer details.

Thanks for your advice and I will implement it.

 

[wrennywren]

I started PT school at 32. I had 2 kids when I started (3rd kid came 1 month before graduation... whoops). It was really hard balancing family and school and my wife having a full time job. I just knew that I would have to sacrifice so much family time during PT school but knew it would be worth it in the end. I graduated 3 years ago and have a great job and am loving life. My schedule is great, pay is good and I have plenty of time to be with my family.

Hang in there, you can do it!

 

[DocTAP87]

I started PT school at 32. I had 2 kids when I started (3rd kid came 1 month before graduation... whoops). It was really hard balancing family and school and my wife having a full time job. I just knew that I would have to sacrifice so much family time during PT school but knew it would be worth it in the end. I graduated 3 years ago and have a great job and am loving life. My schedule is great, pay is good and I have plenty of time to be with my family.

Hang in there, you can do it!

Sounds just like my situation (except no 3rd kid)! It's really nice reading that, thank you.

 

[NewTestament]

People say things they don't really mean when they're thinking emotionally. I think you just feel frustrated and stressed. But be honest with yourself. Do you really want to be a physical therapist, or do want this semester to be over?

"I feel much better today and I'm in the library studying now."- LOL. Why are you writing this while you are trying to study?

 

[DocTAP87]

[QUOTE="NewTestament, post: 18370278, member: 358999"

"I feel much better today and I'm in the library studying now."- LOL. Why are you writing this while you are trying to study?[/QUOTE]

Well you can't just jump right in and study cold. You need to warm up with some steady procrastination!

 

[Azimuthal]

[QUOTE="NewTestament, post: 18370278, member: 358999"

"I feel much better today and I'm in the library studying now."- LOL. Why are you writing this while you are trying to study?

Well you can't just jump right in and study cold. You need to warm up with some steady procrastination![/QUOTE]

That was me. 6 hours. 20% study. 30% Facebook. 15% web surfing. 10% music. 25% texting.

 

[gotaspirations]

Thank you for the nice replies. I made this thread in the middle of a breakdown and felt guilty about it the next day. I feel much better today and I'm in the library studying now. It really helps to get it out sometimes. I worked hard in undergrad to get accepted and when I got accepted, I had this thought in my head that it was going to be this super supportive environment but instead I'm being followed with this constant thought of being dismissed at any moment. It was like, "prove that you're good enough to get in and then prove that you're good enough to stay."

I met with my kines prof and she helped me figure out what I'm doing wrong. I'm not going into enough detail so I've really been hammering away at the finer details.

Thanks for your advice and I will implement it.

Just found this post. This is exactly how I'm feeling most of the time for my first semester.

 

[Thunderbuddy1]

Just found this post. This is exactly how I'm feeling most of the time for my first semester.

From my experience (and from what I have been told) - the first year is brutal. I was told they do this to weed out the weaker students. Literally I would look in the mirror everyday and tell myself it's going to get easier. It's imperative that you form a little support group with some of your classmates. I had a group of 5, we had a group chat going, if anyone of us had any questions or needed help thats the first thing they would use (it's also way faster). We also used to share notes.... Also - you must find an outlet to burn off the stress. I dont care how busy you are - even if it's 15 minutes - use that time for yourself to clear your head and re-group. I found yoga to be a big help. Lastly, GET SLEEP! There were very few times that I studied past 9:00 PM (only if really needed to). Instead I used to get up at like 5am.

Keep at it, every semester gets easier. Good luck!

 

[scrawnyguy]

From my experience (and from what I have been told) - the first year is brutal. I was told they do this to weed out the weaker students. Literally I would look in the mirror everyday and tell myself it's going to get easier. It's imperative that you form a little support group with some of your classmates. I had a group of 5, we had a group chat going, if anyone of us had any questions or needed help thats the first thing they would use (it's also way faster). We also used to share notes.... Also - you must find an outlet to burn off the stress. I dont care how busy you are - even if it's 15 minutes - use that time for yourself to clear your head and re-group. I found yoga to be a big help. Lastly, GET SLEEP! There were very few times that I studied past 9:00 PM (only if really needed to). Instead I used to get up at like 5am.

Keep at it, every semester gets easier. Good luck!

Good advice all around, but definitely with the sleep part. I made the mistake of sacrificing sleep for study time and it backfired big time. I was so tired all of the time that during my actual study sessions I often had trouble absorbing the information or I was too foggy during the day to access the info when I needed it. I've prioritized sleep this semester and even though I study a little less that time is much more efficient.

 

[DocTAP87]

From my experience (and from what I have been told) - the first year is brutal. I was told they do this to weed out the weaker students. Literally I would look in the mirror everyday and tell myself it's going to get easier. It's imperative that you form a little support group with some of your classmates. I had a group of 5, we had a group chat going, if anyone of us had any questions or needed help thats the first thing they would use (it's also way faster). We also used to share notes.... Also - you must find an outlet to burn off the stress. I dont care how busy you are - even if it's 15 minutes - use that time for yourself to clear your head and re-group. I found yoga to be a big help. Lastly, GET SLEEP! There were very few times that I studied past 9:00 PM (only if really needed to). Instead I used to get up at like 5am.

Keep at it, every semester gets easier. Good luck!

You sound a lot like me. I also don't stay up late, found relief in yoga along with eating right and strength training, and having friends you can turn to definitely helps. I also started talking with a school counselor which was a great way to explore what was bothering me in school and in life in general. Through that and a lot of discussion with my wife, I did decide to drop to part time. I had to make that decision on what is best for my family and my mental health.

 

[Doc-PT]

For the record, the first year is definitely the worst and when you're a second year it suddenly feels so much easier. Then you look at all the first years and you laugh and laugh because they have no idea what kind of hell they're in for. Also if you're one of those people that tries to study everything assigned to you in terms of reading...for me at least...it was absolutely impossible. Absorb the information while you're in class so you'll remember it and study the SLIDES or particular articles as a refresher before the exams. For about the first three weeks I tried to do all the readings and it was quite literally impossible. Then I decided I couldn't do it so why try to do it and, suddenly, I had time after school to relax and reset for the next day. So allow yourself to get to that place, the second year is a totally different ballgame. You've come this far--don't give up now. Your future DPT self will be thankful for listening.

 

[Snippybiscuit]

From my experience (and from what I have been told) - the first year is brutal. I was told they do this to weed out the weaker students. Literally I would look in the mirror everyday and tell myself it's going to get easier. It's imperative that you form a little support group with some of your classmates. I had a group of 5, we had a group chat going, if anyone of us had any questions or needed help thats the first thing they would use (it's also way faster). We also used to share notes.... Also - you must find an outlet to burn off the stress. I dont care how busy you are - even if it's 15 minutes - use that time for yourself to clear your head and re-group. I found yoga to be a big help. Lastly, GET SLEEP! There were very few times that I studied past 9:00 PM (only if really needed to). Instead I used to get up at like 5am.

Keep at it, every semester gets easier. Good luck!

What about the ppl that do bad in 2nd or 3rd year? Lol