Should I Quit being a Research Assistant?

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Hi,

I have joined a lab at my university since spring (few hours), but I have worked 20+ in the lab during this summer, and 40+ hours for the first several weeks before classes started. This is my first lab and never had prior experience

I'm about to be or close to being fired and wanted to discuss the situation.

My mentor or graduate student who i work for is angry about my performance and does not like repeating things. He believes using the lab equipment is logic. He said that I did not meet his expectations, and repeated some mistakes few to several times, such as forgetting to fully cap the head of nuclease-free water, sucking liquid into the pipet (happened only two times), not fully covering my samples on ice, lying about what I can get done, and my hours are less and not good. He also states that I should have kept detailed notes and that he told me to take them. He blames me for one or two steps out of 100 that I forget or have not written down. But I have understood this point and tried to be better at note taking.

Personally, I felt that I was committing enough time and even wanted to do more hours, especially over the weekend. I did not know he wouldn't like me to work on the weekends and that it was not possible. He said if I was in your shoes I would be feeling that I failed. And that is a bit hurtful.

He said now he is putting me on a "trial" and if he is still unhappy, he will fire me.

I have cut food, fed his mice, and did many qPCRs. I have learned well after doing the techniques several times. However, in the lab we are doing several different experiments at once and its hard for me to know the steps and do them without thinking or error. Jumping from experiment to experiment is hard for me without doing them three times from scratch on my own and after one month be expected to remember and know to carry out the experiments.

He said, he expected me to be able to carry over his experiment once I came to lab and I'm not at that point. And that he has admitted that he has low patience and can get angry quickly.

He also pointed out that I got a scholarship for doing a research project over the summer and that he is not happy that I'm getting paid for this because of my performance. The lab is not paying me and this was an outside scholarship.

My goal is not to make him unhappy but satisfied and trusting. I want to please him and maybe a year later obtain a LOR. I wanted to do an honor thesis under him, and do love the project. I just don't know what to do at this point. The previous day went fine and did not yell at me after we had a reconciliation with one of the lab staff. But I'm now in trial phase.

Should I look for another lab in the same department and quit shortly after? or give it another chance since he has trained me and I have shadowed him for the past two months. I feel he would lose the most if I leave. Additionally, a lab staff told me another person was working for him and it did not work.

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Hi,

I have joined a lab at my university since spring (few hours), but I have worked 20+ in the lab during this summer, and 40+ hours for the first several weeks before classes started. This is my first lab and never had prior experience

I'm about to be or close to being fired and wanted to discuss the situation.

My mentor or graduate student who i work for is angry about my performance and does not like repeating things. He believes using the lab equipment is logic. He said that I did not meet his expectations, and repeated some mistakes few to several times, such as forgetting to fully cap the head of nuclease-free water, sucking liquid into the pipet (happened only two times), not fully covering my samples on ice, lying about what I can get done, and my hours are less and not good. He also states that I should have kept detailed notes and that he told me to take them. He blames me for one or two steps out of 100 that I forget or have not written down. But I have understood this point and tried to be better at note taking.

Personally, I felt that I was committing enough time and even wanted to do more hours, especially over the weekend. I did not know he wouldn't like me to work on the weekends and that it was not possible. He said if I was in your shoes I would be feeling that I failed. And that is a bit hurtful.

He said now he is putting me on a "trial" and if he is still unhappy, he will fire me.

I have cut food, fed his mice, and did many qPCRs. I have learned well after doing the techniques several times. However, in the lab we are doing several different experiments at once and its hard for me to know the steps and do them without thinking or error. Jumping from experiment to experiment is hard for me without doing them three times from scratch on my own and after one month be expected to remember and know to carry out the experiments.

He said, he expected me to be able to carry over his experiment once I came to lab and I'm not at that point. And that he has admitted that he has low patience and can get angry quickly.

He also pointed out that I got a scholarship for doing a research project over the summer and that he is not happy that I'm getting paid for this because of my performance. The lab is not paying me and this was an outside scholarship.

My goal is not to make him unhappy but satisfied and trusting. I want to please him and maybe a year later obtain a LOR. I wanted to do an honor thesis under him, and do love the project. I just don't know what to do at this point. The previous day went fine and did not yell at me after we had a reconciliation with one of the lab staff. But I'm now in trial phase.

Should I look for another lab in the same department and quit shortly after? or give it another chance since he has trained me and I have shadowed him for the past two months. I feel he would lose the most if I leave. Additionally, a lab staff told me another person was working for him and it did not work.
Just be better at your job. Taking notes and closing lids is kind of a bare minimum level of performance
 
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I was in a similar position my first year. I just left the lab, focused on my grades, and engaged in activities that I really cared for. I've been much happier ever since.
 
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Just be better at your job. Taking notes and closing lids is kind of a bare minimum level of performance

indeed, its not like I left them open, but forgot to fully close them before leaving... but this only happened once during the first week and is being held against me to this day

I was in a similar position my first year. I just left the lab, focused on my grades, and engaged in activities that I really cared for. I've been much happier ever since.

I do enjoy research, but thanks for the reply knowing that i'm not the only one.
 
First off, don't beat yourself up over these mistakes. As your first time in the lab ever no one should expect you to be a superstar. Those are rare and hard to find. Part of the issue here is the teaching ability of your graduate student. Not everyone is meant to be a teacher in this situation. Some are great at research but cannot convey how to actually perform it to others.

As for the lab part, it seems that there are personality differences and in life you can't get along with everyone. It might be wise to take a step back (as the user said above me) and focus on other things. Also, not everyone is good at lab work just like not everyone is great at math. That is ok. Doesn't mean you won't be great at something else.

Ps- don't feel too bad. My first intern threw away all my cloning samples from the past six months so that was all fun to redo.
 
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Sorry to hear about your situation, OP. First lab experience is two-sided for most people. Don't feel too bad about it.
 
First off, don't beat yourself up over these mistakes. As your first time in the lab ever no one should expect you to be a superstar. Those are rare and hard to find. Part of the issue here is the teaching ability of your graduate student. Not everyone is meant to be a teacher in this situation. Some are great at research but cannot convey how to actually perform it to others.

As for the lab part, it seems that there are personality differences and in life you can't get along with everyone. It might be wise to take a step back (as the user said above me) and focus on other things. Also, not everyone is good at lab work just like not everyone is great at math. That is ok. Doesn't mean you won't be great at something else.

Ps- don't feel too bad. My first intern threw away all my cloning samples from the past six months so that was all fun to redo.

Thanks for your response! It's my first time! And maybe I got unlucky with my grad student should i join another lab? or keep working in his lab?
 
First off, don't beat yourself up over these mistakes. As your first time in the lab ever no one should expect you to be a superstar. Those are rare and hard to find. Part of the issue here is the teaching ability of your graduate student. Not everyone is meant to be a teacher in this situation. Some are great at research but cannot convey how to actually perform it to others.

As for the lab part, it seems that there are personality differences and in life you can't get along with everyone. It might be wise to take a step back (as the user said above me) and focus on other things. Also, not everyone is good at lab work just like not everyone is great at math. That is ok. Doesn't mean you won't be great at something else.

Ps- don't feel too bad. My first intern threw away all my cloning samples from the past six months so that was all fun to redo.

If I threw away tissue samples, I would be fired right then. He has not patience and wants me to know where everything is located, know all the buffers, know all the experiments and take over for him when necessary. I think this expectation is too high. I have spoken to another grad student in the department and told me that I was doing more work compared to her own RAs.
 
Quit the lab and pursue something else. Note that you are not required to do research to get into medical school. Nor are you confined to basic science/wet lab research. The grad student mentor is the wrong person to work for since your job is to learn and understand how science works, and sadly he failed to realize that. This lab is not worth your time and effort.
 
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Quit the lab and pursue something else. Note that you are not required to do research to get into medical school. Nor are you confined to basic science/wet lab research. The grad student mentor is the wrong person to work for since your job is to learn and understand how science works, and sadly he failed to realize that. This lab is not worth your time and effort.

I do enjoy research, and I have gained training in biochemical assays through two different programs.
 
Hi,

I have joined a lab at my university since spring (few hours), but I have worked 20+ in the lab during this summer, and 40+ hours for the first several weeks before classes started. This is my first lab and never had prior experience

I'm about to be or close to being fired and wanted to discuss the situation.

My mentor or graduate student who i work for is angry about my performance and does not like repeating things. He believes using the lab equipment is logic. He said that I did not meet his expectations, and repeated some mistakes few to several times, such as forgetting to fully cap the head of nuclease-free water, sucking liquid into the pipet (happened only two times), not fully covering my samples on ice, lying about what I can get done, and my hours are less and not good. He also states that I should have kept detailed notes and that he told me to take them. He blames me for one or two steps out of 100 that I forget or have not written down. But I have understood this point and tried to be better at note taking.

Personally, I felt that I was committing enough time and even wanted to do more hours, especially over the weekend. I did not know he wouldn't like me to work on the weekends and that it was not possible. He said if I was in your shoes I would be feeling that I failed. And that is a bit hurtful.

He said now he is putting me on a "trial" and if he is still unhappy, he will fire me.

I have cut food, fed his mice, and did many qPCRs. I have learned well after doing the techniques several times. However, in the lab we are doing several different experiments at once and its hard for me to know the steps and do them without thinking or error. Jumping from experiment to experiment is hard for me without doing them three times from scratch on my own and after one month be expected to remember and know to carry out the experiments.

He said, he expected me to be able to carry over his experiment once I came to lab and I'm not at that point. And that he has admitted that he has low patience and can get angry quickly.

He also pointed out that I got a scholarship for doing a research project over the summer and that he is not happy that I'm getting paid for this because of my performance. The lab is not paying me and this was an outside scholarship.

My goal is not to make him unhappy but satisfied and trusting. I want to please him and maybe a year later obtain a LOR. I wanted to do an honor thesis under him, and do love the project. I just don't know what to do at this point. The previous day went fine and did not yell at me after we had a reconciliation with one of the lab staff. But I'm now in trial phase.

Should I look for another lab in the same department and quit shortly after? or give it another chance since he has trained me and I have shadowed him for the past two months. I feel he would lose the most if I leave. Additionally, a lab staff told me another person was working for him and it did not work.

Your mentor sounds like a terrible mentor. Either find a new mentor in the lab or leave the lab. Research is hard. You will fail and make mistakes. Even "superstars" make mistakes. Of course, if you make them all the time and nothing works then you need to take a good look at what you are doing and improve. But if they are occasional and someone still gets mad at you, the onus is on them. Good mentors are critical but also patient and understanding, provided you are not completely incompetent. From the sound of it, your mentor lacks the leadership skills to be an investigator, another trait YOU want to avoid in a mentor.

Remember who you want to learn from should be 1) a good scientist AND 2) a good mentor. Both of these criteria should be fulfilled.
 
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I would just leave, doesn't sound like this guy is worth your efforts
 
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Your mentor sounds like a terrible mentor. Either find a new mentor in the lab or leave the lab. Research is hard. You will fail and make mistakes. Even "superstars" make mistakes. Of course, if you make them all the time and nothing works then you need to take a good look at what you are doing and improve. But if they are occasional and someone still gets mad at you, the onus is on them. Good mentors are critical but also patient and understanding, provided you are not completely incompetent. From the sound of it, your mentor lacks the leadership skills to be an investigator, another trait YOU want to avoid in a mentor.

Remember who you want to learn from should be 1) a good scientist AND 2) a good mentor. Both of these criteria should be fulfilled.

I listed all the negative things he thinks about me. But I do feel many of them are unwarranted if they happen for the first time or even second.

The only issue is that he has shown me like 6-8 different techniques (that's because he was working on his project) and it's hard to learn them all perfectly without doing each several times.

I now feel competent that I can do qPCRs because I have done few in a row and finished over twenty now. But that's still not enough for him, and that I needed to put more hours in the summer (could not class) and shouldn't have expected that I could work on the weekends.
 
Your PI sucks and is a huge part of the problem in lab research. Kids join labs and hate science and hate research because of awful, jaded mentors like him who can't remember when they were in your shoes.

Talk with him, tell him you're grateful for the opportunity but you'd like to explore other options. Be cordial. If you stay in this lab, you will be miserable.

Find a mentor who treats you with respect and you can enjoy working with.
 
I'd find a new lab. I've made a lot of the same mistakes as you this summer during research, and my postdoc has been extremely kind about it, which is the way it should be since none of my (or your) mistakes have been particularly serious.
That being said, remember that this is a learning experience, so try not to take it too personally.
 
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Thanks for your response! It's my first time! And maybe I got unlucky with my grad student should i join another lab? or keep working in his lab?

I would leave this lab. If you are understanding basic techniques and really would like to do more research then you could definitely find another lab. As mentioned by other posts this is a mentor problem and not necessarily a you problem. Find someone who meshes with your personality and someone you admire and try to work in that lab. Leadership styles come in all forms and if you really want a letter of recommendation from a lab then find a better mentor.
 
Leave this laboratory. Look at the research faculty webpages of your university, find something that interests you and email them about a position. Other options are available if you seek them out. :)

Sounds like this grad student has his own issues which are just compounded by the fact that he has to spend extra time teaching someone when he really doesn't want to. Best to get out of this situation. Also, I wouldn't personally seek out a letter of recommendation from a graduate student, but rather a post-doc or the PI. Good luck with everything!
 
Hi,

I have joined a lab at my university since spring (few hours), but I have worked 20+ in the lab during this summer, and 40+ hours for the first several weeks before classes started. This is my first lab and never had prior experience

I'm about to be or close to being fired and wanted to discuss the situation.

My mentor or graduate student who i work for is angry about my performance and does not like repeating things. He believes using the lab equipment is logic. He said that I did not meet his expectations, and repeated some mistakes few to several times, such as forgetting to fully cap the head of nuclease-free water, sucking liquid into the pipet (happened only two times), not fully covering my samples on ice, lying about what I can get done, and my hours are less and not good. He also states that I should have kept detailed notes and that he told me to take them. He blames me for one or two steps out of 100 that I forget or have not written down. But I have understood this point and tried to be better at note taking.

Personally, I felt that I was committing enough time and even wanted to do more hours, especially over the weekend. I did not know he wouldn't like me to work on the weekends and that it was not possible. He said if I was in your shoes I would be feeling that I failed. And that is a bit hurtful.

He said now he is putting me on a "trial" and if he is still unhappy, he will fire me.

I have cut food, fed his mice, and did many qPCRs. I have learned well after doing the techniques several times. However, in the lab we are doing several different experiments at once and its hard for me to know the steps and do them without thinking or error. Jumping from experiment to experiment is hard for me without doing them three times from scratch on my own and after one month be expected to remember and know to carry out the experiments.

He said, he expected me to be able to carry over his experiment once I came to lab and I'm not at that point. And that he has admitted that he has low patience and can get angry quickly.

He also pointed out that I got a scholarship for doing a research project over the summer and that he is not happy that I'm getting paid for this because of my performance. The lab is not paying me and this was an outside scholarship.

My goal is not to make him unhappy but satisfied and trusting. I want to please him and maybe a year later obtain a LOR. I wanted to do an honor thesis under him, and do love the project. I just don't know what to do at this point. The previous day went fine and did not yell at me after we had a reconciliation with one of the lab staff. But I'm now in trial phase.

Should I look for another lab in the same department and quit shortly after? or give it another chance since he has trained me and I have shadowed him for the past two months. I feel he would lose the most if I leave. Additionally, a lab staff told me another person was working for him and it did not work.

I'm very patient with my grad students and expect mistake to be made. It's part of your training. But not writing things down is essentially the same as you never having done the work at all.

I would talk to your PI/mentor and request that you be allowed to do a single thing. Do one thing, do it well.

You're not at the point where I would trust you to work independently on the weekends either.

IF your request is not acceptable to them, then find another lab.
 
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Your PI sucks and is a huge part of the problem in lab research. Kids join labs and hate science and hate research because of awful, jaded mentors like him who can't remember when they were in your shoes.

Talk with him, tell him you're grateful for the opportunity but you'd like to explore other options. Be cordial. If you stay in this lab, you will be miserable.

Find a mentor who treats you with respect and you can enjoy working with.

The summer is over, and I stayed to do research for this week. I went and rent a room ten days earlier, instead of going home to relax before class starts.

I have done research from 10:30 am til 7:30 pm. And today he yelled at me for not doing one of the things he wanted, and told me in summary "I think we are done here" and in this moment I also said I think that is for the best. And left after. Now I'm really sad and was in tears when I left.
 
The summer is over, and I stayed to do research for this week. I went and rent a room ten days earlier, instead of going home to relax before class starts.

I have done research from 10:30 am til 7:30 pm. And today he yelled at me for not doing one of the things he wanted, and told me in summary "I think we are done here" and in this moment I also said I think that is for the best. And left after. Now I'm really sad and was in tears when I left.
There are other research venues. This is a volunteer effort on your part and there is no reason for you to be miserable in this experience. The need for research is overrated for a lot med schools, anyway, as the wise @gonnif keeps trying to point out.
 
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The summer is over, and I stayed to do research for this week. I went and rent a room ten days earlier, instead of going home to relax before class starts.

I have done research from 10:30 am til 7:30 pm. And today he yelled at me for not doing one of the things he wanted, and told me in summary "I think we are done here" and in this moment I also said I think that is for the best. And left after. Now I'm really sad and was in tears when I left.

That guy is really terrible. Go eat some ice cream, do something nice for yourself.
 
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Hi,

I have joined a lab at my university since spring (few hours), but I have worked 20+ in the lab during this summer, and 40+ hours for the first several weeks before classes started. This is my first lab and never had prior experience

I'm about to be or close to being fired and wanted to discuss the situation.

My mentor or graduate student who i work for is angry about my performance and does not like repeating things. He believes using the lab equipment is logic. He said that I did not meet his expectations, and repeated some mistakes few to several times, such as forgetting to fully cap the head of nuclease-free water, sucking liquid into the pipet (happened only two times), not fully covering my samples on ice, lying about what I can get done, and my hours are less and not good. He also states that I should have kept detailed notes and that he told me to take them. He blames me for one or two steps out of 100 that I forget or have not written down. But I have understood this point and tried to be better at note taking.

Personally, I felt that I was committing enough time and even wanted to do more hours, especially over the weekend. I did not know he wouldn't like me to work on the weekends and that it was not possible. He said if I was in your shoes I would be feeling that I failed. And that is a bit hurtful.

He said now he is putting me on a "trial" and if he is still unhappy, he will fire me.

I have cut food, fed his mice, and did many qPCRs. I have learned well after doing the techniques several times. However, in the lab we are doing several different experiments at once and its hard for me to know the steps and do them without thinking or error. Jumping from experiment to experiment is hard for me without doing them three times from scratch on my own and after one month be expected to remember and know to carry out the experiments.

He said, he expected me to be able to carry over his experiment once I came to lab and I'm not at that point. And that he has admitted that he has low patience and can get angry quickly.

He also pointed out that I got a scholarship for doing a research project over the summer and that he is not happy that I'm getting paid for this because of my performance. The lab is not paying me and this was an outside scholarship.

My goal is not to make him unhappy but satisfied and trusting. I want to please him and maybe a year later obtain a LOR. I wanted to do an honor thesis under him, and do love the project. I just don't know what to do at this point. The previous day went fine and did not yell at me after we had a reconciliation with one of the lab staff. But I'm now in trial phase.

Should I look for another lab in the same department and quit shortly after? or give it another chance since he has trained me and I have shadowed him for the past two months. I feel he would lose the most if I leave. Additionally, a lab staff told me another person was working for him and it did not work.

Was there a difference in culture between you and your boss here? I only ask because I worked with PI's from vastly different cultural backgrounds, and some can come off much harsher than others. Some of it can be chopped up to them just being rude, but a lot of their behavior was acceptable where they came from.

That being said, I did bench lab work for 3 years in undergrad and while I was learning I never had someone belittle my skills or intelligence. Yeah you should have written things down and closed caps, but stuff happens. I get wanting to have an intern that can work fairly independently, especially if it is a smaller lab, but you're simply being asked to do too much. Every department you work in, if you still do research, will have a PI that cannot teach, expects the world, and goes through RA/interns like candy.

Take this as a lesson. You gave your best effort both personally and professionally, but sometimes there is a time to walk away. You didn't fail, you learned. Don't let this deter you from doing more research elsewhere (unless you absolutely hate it). Also, like someone else mentioned, think about getting involved with qualitative research projects. I did one for a semester and it was surprisingly refreshing.
 
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Was there a difference in culture between you and your boss here? I only ask because I worked with PI's from vastly different cultural backgrounds, and some can come off much harsher than others. Some of it can be chopped up to them just being rude, but a lot of their behavior was acceptable where they came from.

That being said, I did bench lab work for 3 years in undergrad and while I was learning I never had someone belittle my skills or intelligence. Yeah you should have written things down and closed caps, but stuff happens. I get wanting to have an intern that can work fairly independently, especially if it is a smaller lab, but you're simply being asked to do too much. Every department you work in, if you still do research, will have a PI that cannot teach, expects the world, and goes through RA/interns like candy.

Take this as a lesson. You gave your best effort both personally and professionally, but sometimes there is a time to walk away. You didn't fail, you learned. Don't let this deter you from doing more research elsewhere (unless you absolutely hate it). Also, like someone else mentioned, think about getting involved with qualitative research projects. I did one for a semester and it was surprisingly refreshing.

Yup, re: caps and lids I did that the first few days of lab but never did it again after we talked about it, yet he still remembers. The Grad student was mexican and I was from somewhere in the middle east.
 
You don't want a LOR from him. He's a graduate student - who cares what he thinks? Best case scenario he puts in a good word with his Ph.D. mentor and you get a letter from them, but I doubt that will happen here. Put down you did research for a few dozen hours and move on. I would find a more positive work environment with a better mentor (and ideally work with a Ph.D) if you're dead set on a research experience.

Going by what you wrote he seems to have unrealistic expectations about how to get you up to speed, and is mad he has to teach. On your end, if you're making that many mistakes its probably too much work, or you're not grasping the basics of what you're doing. You need to communicate that, and not just say "okay" because you want to make a good impression, then not follow through. Offering to work weekends doesn't do any good if someone needs to be there to supervise. Labs are dangerous places to work alone.

Don't beat yourself up about any of this. When an undergrad is assigned to a graduate student its not solely to make their lives easier. Its also because they're supposed to learn how to be mentors. Taking on and teaching interested students and volunteers and is part of running a lab, especially if you've got an NIH or government grant or are at a public university.
 
I was in a similar position my first year. I just left the lab, focused on my grades, and engaged in activities that I really cared for. I've been much happier ever since.
Honestly, I had a PI just like the one you mentioned...well I had 2 that stand out. They were always FOCUSING ON THE NEGATIVE and always condescending. The stress level was ridiculous, I GOT NERVOUS BEING SEEN TAKING MY LUNCH BREAK... because I was never fast enough or anywhere to be found. For my male PI, I kept reminding him I liked reading journal articles and doing my data analysis in in the common area because of faster internet. For my female PI, I just ate snacks throughout the day to compensate for her always looking for me.

I was compromising my own health, losing sleep and not eating, just to justify my passion and work ethics. It WON'T GET BETTER. Even if you do better, your PI seems to be the type to always remind you of your mistakes and does not seem like a good mentor.

If you love research, instead of quitting research altogether, try and get into another lab so you can really harvest your passion for science. Just because your PI is not the type of mentor you want or should have, does not mean you should turn your back if you really DO like research. Also I know how stressful it feels to feel like you are on the verge of being fired...

1) male PI - told human resources I only worked 10 hours for one week when I worked over 70 (even slept in the lab to avoid two hour morning traffic). When I confronted him, he said I COULDN'T GET PAID FOR MY SLOW LEARNING CURVE. That's really stressful because I was still in training and have not mastered every procedure in the lab and the person before me was mentally clocked out as he was due to leave for medical school and has turned in his resignation a few weeks prior. Also I needed money to pay for rent, my car.... all my bills... I ended up resigning before securing another job. Either way, I wasn't getting paid my 40 hours and was going hungry and depressed.

2) female PI - didn't make a data summary fast enough to put into powerpoint. I was using a MAC and transferring some data from a PC so the software was incompatible and I spend some time having to download the compatible version. I told her this and she just said I'm just too slow and incompetent... I ended up graduating from the program. I almost tried to find another PI to get my degree with but with funding issues and the amount of effort I already had, I bit my tongue, forced a smile and always told myself to 'clock out mentally once you walk out those doors' because your work life is not supposed to be the foundation of your mood for the rest of your day.

HOWEVER, IF YOUR END GOAL IS MEDICAL SCHOOL, DONT BE LIKE ME AND WASTE MORE TIME... focus on clinicals and shadowing, MCAT..VOLUNTEERING.. whatever you need to finalize your application. You can always do more research once in medical school. For me, I just tried too hard to make every employment situation ideal when I should've just focused on my MCAT.
 
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Yup, re: caps and lids I did that the first few days of lab but never did it again after we talked about it, yet he still remembers. The Grad student was mexican and I was from somewhere in the middle east.

Yeah, I have had supervisors and research mentors from all over (Turkey, China, etc.). I have even been repeatedly yelled at in Romanian. However, those same people (even the yeller) taught me a ton, never made me feel unappreciated or like I was wasting their time, and ended up writing me great LORs for med school and jobs. It sounds like you just have someone that does not want to teach, and like someone above me said, they are only a grad student. You do not need their LOR and you still have time to get more elsewhere.

Also, let me reiterate that unless you love research there is no real need to just do bench lab work. You can put this time down on your resume and app, but you don't have to give the rest of your college years to it. Boost your app by pursuing volunteering and clinical experiences. I really enjoyed research and don't regret it, but if I could go back I would not have put so much time into just completing my thesis. I would have fought harder for clinical experiences and shadowing during college.
 
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Honestly, I had a PI just like the one you mentioned...well I had 2 that stand out. They were always FOCUSING ON THE NEGATIVE and always condescending. The stress level was ridiculous, I GOT NERVOUS BEING SEEN TAKING MY LUNCH BREAK... because I was never fast enough or anywhere to be found. For my male PI, I kept reminding him I liked reading journal articles and doing my data analysis in in the common area because of faster internet. For my female PI, I just ate snacks throughout the day to compensate for her always looking for me.

I was compromising my own health, losing sleep and not eating, just to justify my passion and work ethics. It WON'T GET BETTER. Even if you do better, your PI seems to be the type to always remind you of your mistakes and does not seem like a good mentor.

If you love research, instead of quitting research altogether, try and get into another lab so you can really harvest your passion for science. Just because your PI is not the type of mentor you want or should have, does not mean you should turn your back if you really DO like research. Also I know how stressful it feels to feel like you are on the verge of being fired...

1) male PI - told human resources I only worked 10 hours for one week when I worked over 70 (even slept in the lab to avoid two hour morning traffic). When I confronted him, he said I COULDN'T GET PAID FOR MY SLOW LEARNING CURVE. That's really stressful because I was still in training and have not mastered every procedure in the lab and the person before me was mentally clocked out as he was due to leave for medical school and has turned in his resignation a few weeks prior. Also I needed money to pay for rent, my car.... all my bills... I ended up resigning before securing another job. Either way, I wasn't getting paid my 40 hours and was going hungry and depressed.

2) female PI - didn't make a data summary fast enough to put into powerpoint. I was using a MAC and transferring some data from a PC so the software was incompatible and I spend some time having to download the compatible version. I told her this and she just said I'm just too slow and incompetent... I ended up graduating from the program. I almost tried to find another PI to get my degree with but with funding issues and the amount of effort I already had, I bit my tongue, forced a smile and always told myself to 'clock out mentally once you walk out those doors' because your work life is not supposed to be the foundation of your mood for the rest of your day.

HOWEVER, IF YOUR END GOAL IS MEDICAL SCHOOL, DONT BE LIKE ME AND WASTE MORE TIME... focus on clinicals and shadowing, MCAT..VOLUNTEERING.. whatever you need to finalize your application. You can always do more research once in medical school. For me, I just tried too hard to make every employment situation ideal when I should've just focused on my MCAT.

Thank you so much for sharing your experience! It really shows that finding compatible people to work with is often not easy. I want to learn more about research and find great opportunities in the lab. I plan to take few gap years to study for mcat and clinical work and other stuff. (but this is not for med school but to see if any other subject interests me more than med school)
 
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Thank you so much for sharing your experience! It really shows that finding compatible people to work with is often not easy. I want to learn more about research and find great opportunities in the lab. I plan to take few gap years to study for mcat and clinical work and other stuff. (but this is not for med school but to see if any other subject interests me more than med school)

This is exactly what I did and I think taking the time to do that is extremely smart. You never want to rush yourself into a profession that requires so much time, energy and money before committing 100%! Doing so made my personal statement much easier to write plus you'll have so many ECs you'll have to decide which ones to put on there! Best of luck to you!
 
Basically, you really need to figure out if the person you are with cares about you enough. Don't work for a dictator, work for a mentor that wants to see you succeed.
 
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Thank you so much for sharing your experience! It really shows that finding compatible people to work with is often not easy. I want to learn more about research and find great opportunities in the lab. I plan to take few gap years to study for mcat and clinical work and other stuff. (but this is not for med school but to see if any other subject interests me more than med school)
I do not wish I spend more time on research knowing my end goal is going to medical school but... IT WAS A LESSON I LEARNED nonetheless =)
 
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