I think the article is well-intentioned but idk if I agree with a lot of it. To me, women just come off very superficial in it, and a lot of it just sounds hyperbolic.
"The female doctors, who I know for certain are married (and remains married), are either super, super attractive — like a model. Or they are foreign doctors and participated in arranged marriages."
"Even if the female doctor was willing to forgo hypergamy and marry down"...?!
I'd take a man who makes less but is great to me all day everyday, over a guy that makes more but treats me like crap. Marrying a guy who makes less or is shorter or is less educated isn't necessarily the same as marrying down.
If all female physicians held that attitude, I don't think there would be a dating/marriage/chores/etc problem.
The "problem" exists because of hypergamy largely whereby female physicians (usually in late 20s and 30s/40s) will ONLY date/marry men who make equal and preferably MORE than they do.
This is exacerbated by them wanting an "equal" relationship with those men in terms of doing chores or housework/taking care of kids.
Many of the male physicians are more than willing to date/marry women who are younger/slender and willing to have children/take care of children/do the chores/etc despite these women making far less than the male.
This has lead to a DEFICIT of men that women physician females find "suitable" due to a large segment of those 30s/40s physician males marrying/dating off with non physician females.
The article basically realistically evaluates the situation for those female physicians who have unrestrained hypergamy and the reason they will have a very difficult time going forward.
Solutions are simple but not easily realized due to "ego" and "hypergamy". Simple solutions include:
A) Marry a man who makes far less money than you but picks up the slack around the household. The male can manage children/chores/etc. The common refrain is that "men aren't willing to do that". However, multiple surveys I have linked confirm that younger men are VERY willing to marry UP. Its the women who have issues with that. They often sabotage these relationships by preemptively being nasty to the poorer male then claiming "men can't handle a strong women and are intimidated", giving them justification to avoid poorer men
B) Get rid of the "can have it all attitude": MOST MEN can't have it ALL and MOST WOMEN can't either. The difference is male physicians are more than willing to trade off wealth/status in their female partners for other things they value. This is why MALE physicians are able to be far more successful in the marriage arena. Female physicians CHOSE to NOT marry men who are lesser financially because they "want it all" and become more bitter as they get older and older.
C) Lose the ENTITLED whiny feminist attitudes and "shaming language": The default position of many female physicians under these circumstances aren't to CHANGE THEMSELVES but to complain/whine about "immature men", "selfish men", "men are intimidated", etc. when they are unable to obtain a male who earns MORE than themselves. They will often write screeds about how he is a "boy child who wants to abuse younger women and is intimidated by strong women".
In essence, they are DEMANDING the richer/successful men to forgo their own preferences to "marry" one of these "strong" women or they will be insulted/shamed. Unfortunately, this isn't a successful tactic and will NOT change BIOLOGICAL preferences that men have.
Surveys of educated/richer men show they STRONG value slender/younger women far more than "income potential" in the female. Income potential is the ICING on the cake but definitely NOT the substance of male desires overall.
D) The fallacy of the "exceptions": Whenever this information is stated, it will be dismissed that there are "exceptions" to this rule and some female Dermatologist married some Ortho Doctor in her 30s. Yes, there are SOME of these cases out there BUT they are NOT the majority and are DIFFICULT to obtain. Often female physicians who can't obtain this DON'T REALISTICALLY compare their situation with the other female who obtained this. Maybe they were HS sweethearts or dated in college for instance? Maybe she is EXTREMELY pretty?
E) The cry of "changing the culture" to basically force higher income men/higher status men to go with "higher income potential" women: This is essentially where feminist women DEMAND men GIVE UP THEIR OWN PREFERENCES in terms of marriage/mating to fulfill the WISHES of the female physician that is often older and not as attractive as the women he is interested in. Its essentially fascistic method that DEMANDs men change for the women without taking into account male preferences. Why should the male have to change his preferences? Maybe its the female physician who needs to change hers? Nah that would be "sexist" asking her to change.
F) Female physicians have a FAR HIGHER ATTRITION rate, especially AFTER having children/marrying a richer dude that can support her:
Part-time women doctors are creating a timebomb
Statistics clearly show women work part time or stop working FAR more than men when having CHILDREN. This is exacerbated when men EARN more than the female, so she can depend on his income.
The question for the male physician is such: If women have a HIGH CHANCE of working part time or dropping out after marrying him, whereby he has to pay for the childcare expenses/student loans/pay for wife's lifestyle while simultaneously being told that he has a "strong educated wife" who is less like to do chores and is older, why would he agree to this deal?
Please don't tell me this doesn't happen in real life with SIGNIFICANT frequency to male physicians. I PERSONALLY know of MANY cases and the stats bear this out.
Its very rational for many men to want to avoid these arrangements and go for younger/slender/less hostile women who don't have large loans when presented with this option.
